"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Girls who hang out with ALOT of guys..?

ironman_2k4

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So im interested in a girl who has ALOT of friends, shes a real social person. Most of her friends are guys, and she hangs out with them alot. We hang out sometimes, but its always casual. Some playing/flirting but not too much.

My question: How do you know if a girl who is good friends with a lot of guys likes you more than just another friend?

Do girls flirt with all of their guy friends?

:confused:

Iron
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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BGMan

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Simple. Get her number. If she gives you b.s. excuses, you know she doesn't like you as more than a friend.

If you do get her number, go out with her. If she gives you b.s. excuses about THAT, again, you know she doesn't like you as more than a friend.

BGMan
 

ToughGuy

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Don't waste time and money on her!!

Hey,
BGMan's advice is on point.
Please listen him and this gal is potentially a teaser, who enjoys all the fun and perks being with guys and giving them the false hope to keep them around her.

forget her, find a new one , i personally don't want you to spent your energy , mind, money and time for this kind of *****.

so stay away and find lots of other for practice , fun, entertainment.

don't get much emotional and sentimental.

Yours

Tuffy
 

becker

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Yeah, as a guy who just went through this exact thing, I'd say it's going to come down to this.

The girl I met is living with a guy as a roommate, and she's openly told me that she has almost all guy friends. She's hot, so that's probably a bunch of guys giving her a lot of attention. Girls who get a lot of attention are picky be default. That's why if you really want them, you have to work your a$$ off for it.

Anyways, typical flaky gal. Our first meeting was somewhat flaky, but I'll tell you, she's either a wolf in sheep's clothing, or else she's genuinely busy when she says she is.

This girl that I dated was pretty darn busy with a lot of personal things going on (parents getting divorced, whacky friends, etc). Anyways, I wrote her an e-mail, and I'm going to just leave her alone. She knows how to get a hold of me if she wants, but I'm not going to spend another minute on that.

I'd say don't go after this girl, she's probably a lot of trouble waiting to happen. I know you don't want to believe that because you're probably pretty into her, but I'd say it's best if you accept it. She's probably not that one in a million gal who isn't like all the others. If that were true, we would have all won the lottery at some point in our lives.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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flexion_

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Beware women with many guy friends. Often they are mental cases at worst and attention *****s at best.

As others have stated, you most likely won't listen to our advise of stop wasting your time but when you've been through the experience for yourself you can come back and post like all the rest of us! :)

Would you want to a have 20 really good friends who are girls that you have no interest in having sex with? Of course you wouldn't... now if there were 20 girls who on some level you were interested and it gave you some self-confidence along with a 20 girl line up of potential sex partners if they fit your mood how would that feel? Think about how silly it would sound if you reversed the roles.
 

DJDamage

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Be cautious when dealing with women who has many guy friends.

You have to ask yourself those questions, why does she has many guy friends? what is she getting from it?.

From my experiences most of those type of girls, don't get along well with other women from one reason to another and they prefer the company of guys.

She prefers the company of other men because she can get away with crap and bad behaviour. Most guys will put up with her crap because in the back of their mind they hope that one day, they will be able to fvck her if they supplicate her now.

She will flirts with them constantly and that is what keeps them hooked.

Why is she doing it? Because she can't get away with this crap with other women. If a woman is selfish and rude to her other female friends, they will eventually abandon her.

With guys its a different story. SHE WILL GETS CERTAIN AMOUNT OF PERKS, WHILE NOT EVEN PUT AN EFFORT OF BEING A GOOD FRIEND. Putting less effort in a friendship while benefiting more is the better deal.

Those types of women also love the attension they get. Its like their hobby. Good healthy minded women (just like Men) are buzy with their careers, hobbies, family and relationship to hang out all the time with friends.

If her male friends are the top source of her happiness and time, then it is a problem.
 

Sart

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various reasons

Attention ***** is a possible but so to is the BPD and APD chicks that everyone is petrified of. BPD chicks have close girl friends and lots of close boy friends as well. These people supply them needs in different circumstances.

I dont have a fear of BPD and APD chicks because I actually empathize with them, they are surviving as best they can. Just dont get oneitis or emotioanlly over involved with them and you will be fine.
 

thefonz

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i was once "involved" with this girl who had practically 80% guy friends......i pretty much consider these women to be female dj's.....my guess is she usually is very attractive and tends to have beef with other women. OH, and she was VERY flirty. They also from my experience are very self-absorbed more so than usual......does she tend to act like she's very busy all the time?Like i got things to do, weals and deals to make so don't take up much of my time? My advice, and this is from my personal experience...NEXT....but make your own decision based on what u know

Did i mention this exact same girl broke my heart left me in months of depression and is the reason i went looking for this site?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Blue Phoenix

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To the starter of this thread. Man, use the "SEARCH" button, you'll find A LOT of posts about this issue!


"She usually is very attractive and tends to have beef with other women."

What do you mean by "beef"???

"They're flirty and from my experience are very self-absorbed more so than usual......does she tend to act like she's very busy all the time?"

All the flirting and "sexy outfit" is just a BAIT. As soon as she notice you fell into, she's gone!

They're inconsiderate and selfish, thus leading to:

"Did i mention this exact same girl broke my heart left me in months of depression and is the reason i went looking for this site?"

Avoid them! They just want to be admired/adored, and to them, you're just (one more) observer/"fan"! You can look but you cannot touch!

Are you willing to play this game?
 
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ScrewIt

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it's not necessarily attention *****, but somwhat imo. i believe @ one time in her life all these guy friends tried to hook up w/her ( and probably still damn tryin to) but got put into the friends zone due to afc.

there was this girl i knew from last semester, she was a hb8.5 and very laid back attitude, thats one thing i liked about her.

she had mentioned to me one time about her having a lot of guy friends. I recall one time i asked her what she did on valentine's day. she said she was @ home, then all of a sudden her friends from nowhere popped up at her doorstep one by one. she has more guy friends that girl friends.

She seemed unconfident, low self esteemed and shy when i had met her. so maybe having all the guy friends around boosts it?

well it's hard to say, but i'd say be careful that you arent afc around her or she'll put u in the friends zone like all the others.
 

MindOverMatter

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they're the same as other girls in my experiance, but if you are a paranoid / jealous type, don't date one cause you will go absolutely insane. it happened to my best friend, the dude went apesh!t with jealosy.

if you don't have that problem, feel free to date them.
 

crotchrocket

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ironman; to first answer your questions; How do you know if you are more than just another friend? Does she treat you differently or act a little differently around you than she does with the others?
Do girls flirt with all of their guy friends? For the most part Yes! there are always exceptions of course.

Is this type of girl not a female DJ? What could be better than a girl who can match you point for point in this game?

Before you get involved with a girl like this, just know two things; #1 if you have any tendency what so ever to be the jealous type -you will be driven completely nuts in no time at all, #2 she will be tough to catch and even harder to hold on to.
 

girl

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Most of my friends are guys, and I flirt with them sometimes, but it's nothing serious, just playing around.

The guy that I'm currently 'involved' with doesn't have a problem with it, he trusts me and knows I would never do anything like that. I act the same way when he's around as when he's not there.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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girl

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how is that disrespect? we have the same friends, that's how we met. i think if you're confident in your relationship, it shouldn't be an issue.

it also depends on what you're interpretting as "flirty". i think sexual inuendos are flirty, hell, i make them and laugh at them. it's not like i grope all over other guys or anything. there's a difference between "joke" flirting (mainly to poke fun at someone) and "real" flirting.
 

jakethasnake

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Originally posted by girl
how is that disrespect? we have the same friends, that's how we met. i think if you're confident in your relationship, it shouldn't be an issue.

it also depends on what you're interpretting as "flirty". i think sexual inuendos are flirty, hell, i make them and laugh at them. it's not like i grope all over other guys or anything. there's a difference between "joke" flirting (mainly to poke fun at someone) and "real" flirting.

Girl,


You are an attention wh0re. Get over it. You're justifying things left and right - but as a female who's very much into this habit of keeping boys on the backburner, you should realize that this "innocent" flirting almost always leads somewhere. Most of the time it'll be the AFC boy that confesses his attraction to you, and you'll rebuff him. But if you're mutually attracted - then uh oh - watch out. You are an attention wh0re - period. End of story. Stop trying to justify yourself.
 

DJDamage

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quote:
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I flirt with them sometimes, but it's nothing serious, just playing around.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

listen girl, to you of coarse its "sweet and innocent playing" but to other men it isn't.

When a woman flirts with a guy, she automatically sends him the message " I am intrested in you" and those same guys you are flirting with, if giving the chance, will want to fvck you.

You got to be really naive, if you are meeting with guy friends and not feeling the vibe that they are not just going out of their way just to meet you and "hang out".

If you were an ugly butch, then those guys friends will not be around.

If one day you get married, do you think your husband would want to hear:

Girl : Hon can you please take care of the kids tonight, I am meeting my old friend Steve in a coffee shop and then we are going to go out and play pool, its been a while since Ive seen him.

SURE GO OUT AND HAVE A GODD TIME!!!!
 

girl

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I don't keep any guys on the back burner, I'm just "one of the guys" normally. (Hell, one of my male friends that is married flirts with people (guys) more than me!) It's all innocent, I'm not going to go for any of them. It just happens that the group of people I hang out with are mostly guys. Why? Because of the school I go to. At my college, we offer aviation, mechanical, electrical, and computer science. There aren't many chicks around. And my guy friends don't even think of me as a "chick". The three girls in our group (myself and 2 others) are always told we're not "chicks", just "cool guys with long hair".

I don't think comments "ear nubs are sexy" (one of my friends has a weird extra hole in his ears), or anything of the like, are going to lead anywhere. People can identify sarcasm.

But think whatever you want. If you would be that unconfident in your girl, I think you should re-evaluate why you'd be jealous of that.

edit:
listen girl, to you of coarse its "sweet and innocent playing" but to other men it isn't.

When a woman flirts with a guy, she automatically sends him the message " I am intrested in you" and those same guys you are flirting with, if giving the chance, will want to fvck you.

You got to be really naive, if you are meeting with guy friends and not feeling the vibe that they are not just going out of their way just to meet you and "hang out".

If you were an ugly butch, then those guys friends will not be around.

If one day you get married, do you think your husband would want to hear:

Girl : Hon can you please take care of the kids tonight, I am meeting my old friend Steve in a coffee shop and then we are going to go out and play pool, its been a while since Ive seen him.
I don't hang out with them alone, always in the "group". (We hang out in the library at school between classes usually, or at LAN parties (where everybody brings thier computer and plays games).

Btw, I am currently married, but seperated and in the process of getting a divorce. (For the record, I was the one who left, he wanted me to stay, but I can't do that anymore.)
 

becker

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I think that this all boils down to one simple thing. People are egotistical by nature.

Who the heck doesn't like people of the opposite sex giving them attention? Whoever says they wouldn't like this is in complete denial or they are trying to make themselves conform to an image which would make them seem more likeable by the people around them. Either way, it's a total copout.

Anyways, don't hate the girl for doing what she does, everyone does it, it's just that nobody is comfortable admitting it. I don't particularly like it, but I guess I can either accept it and just deal, or get caught up in trying to change people's ways of thinking, which is nearly impossible.

But the bottom line is, girl, you like attention, that's plain and simple, no matter what kind of names people call you, if you didn't like the attention, you'd just hang out alone all day. Personally, I wouldn't have a problem if my girl had a guy friend who she hangs out with once in a while, provided that she at least does me the respect of at least maybe inviting me so that I can either come along or let her go. If they're just friends, then surely there is nothing they'll have to discuss that I can't hear, right?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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