"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Girls texting dramatically changed

Beau Johnson

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Ok so I'm new to the site but here goes nothing. So I met this girl about a month ago through my sister, since then we have gotten really close and text all the time. I've been the one to initiate the text but she never fails to reply within about a minute. Well her brother, who I am now friends with, found out that we were texting a lot, and said she needs to pick between me and the guy she used to like but he stopped pursuing her. Now when we text I still initiate and she still responds quickly but it seems like she's holding back like the length has gotten really short. She still acts the same in person, as far as I know, she still hits me "accidentally" or playfully, stays close to my side no matter what, and talks to me about everything; I just want to know what happened and if I can do anything. I'm supposed to talk to her brother tomorrow then her afterward.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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CBear

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If your gut tells you that something is off or that interest has faded, your gut feeling is usually right.

You never mentioned asking her out. Too much texting automatically puts you in the friend zone. Worst thing I did when I started pursuing.
Better luck next time.
 

wifehunter

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Body language is vital.

Texting and calling fail at this, and therefore borderline useless.

Texting and calling are good for setting up face to face meetings is all.
 

Beau Johnson

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No, I had planned to ask her out tomorrow and I might just be really stressing out. We have only been texting for probably 2 1/2 weeks because that's when I actually met her in person and hung out with her. In person she hasn't changed that I can tell, it's just over text. My gut is telling me that her interest is fading which is why I was going to ask her out sooner than I normally would.
 

Beau Johnson

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I actually was going to ask her out earlier but went on a last minute trip out of state and didn't want to do it over text. I've only noticed the change in texting for like two days so I don't know if it's too late or not. She knew I liked her because my sister told her I liked her and her brother and friends have told me she liked me but I didn't want to rush anything.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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antr

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I actually was going to ask her out earlier but went on a last minute trip out of state and didn't want to do it over text. I've only noticed the change in texting for like two days so I don't know if it's too late or not. She knew I liked her because my sister told her I liked her and her brother and friends have told me she liked me but I didn't want to rush anything.
Stop texting. Send her one text message next time and ask her out in 2nd one with time and place, anything other then clear yes, try again in 1 week then next if she doesnt say yes.
 

Beau Johnson

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Stop texting. Send her one text message next time and ask her out in 2nd one with time and place, anything other then clear yes, try again in 1 week then next if she doesnt say yes.
Appreciate it, if everything goes well I'm just going to ask her in person tomorrow. I don't have much experience in this situation though, I've only had one other girlfriend and it was nothing serious. The thing is I'm nervous she might say no, and that would make things awkward because we see each other 3-4 times a week.
 

sph21

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Appreciate it, if everything goes well I'm just going to ask her in person tomorrow.
Nice. Do it. Don't put too much pressure on yourself while you're doing it.

I don't have much experience in this situation though, I've only had one other girlfriend and it was nothing serious. The thing is I'm nervous she might say no, and that would make things awkward because we see each other 3-4 times a week.
Do you want to live your life to your fullest? If yes, then don't be afraid to take the risk. It's part of how we grow. Confidence is not built merely from successes but also from failures.

What other member wrote is correct. Stop texting too much. Texting can kill her attraction for you if you don't know what you're doing. It takes plenty of experiences to balance that texting game. You can easily enter a friendzone by too much texting. If you try to be her friend, then you'll end up in friendzone. It's an abyss.
 
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