girls, as friends.. or.. what?

[ronjohn]

i am a guy. i am 20 years old. all of my true 'good' friends in the past have been guys. whenever i see an attractive girl, i feel a little uneasy (but this is normal). however, when i am find myself in a situation where a girl is around and we're doing something (maybe a school project or a class together where we're partners), i always start to feel like i have a 'connection' with her, and start imagining me asking her on a date or us going out or something. sometimes i make myself insane by constantly thinking of her. this has happened so many times in the past, and these 'insanity' bouts usually last a few weeks.

now to my present situation. school is over and there is a girl i had a class with where we interacted a lot. she lives near by. i am attracted to her. i don't know if she has a boyfriend - as of 1 month ago she did, but i think it is over. if i ask her to do things and hang out, and she occasionally asks me to do things, how do i know if she is wanting to be 'friends' or wanting something more? i have asked her to do things (lunch) and she agreed to go. she has invited me to do things (dinner) and we went.

as my first paragraph explains, i am wanting something more (boy/girlfriend), as i am not used to having girls as just 'friends'. a lot of guys have friends who are girls and visa versa, but i have never experienced this so i am very confused i have had 1 girlfriend in the past, and this lasted over a year, and we were set up - so now i have to do the work on my own.

i hope my questions are clear. first, is what i describe in the 1st paragraph normal or am i crazy? :woo: second is the question in the 2nd paragraph. thank you for any advice

 

[whistler]

You sound pretty normal.

I don't have any friends who are girls. There are girls I know but I'd never sleep with (for whatever reason), but I rarely see them. They're more like acquaintances.

My guess is the girl is interested in you. Unlike guys though, girls can have friends of the opposite sex. So you should either (1) quickly show your sexual interest and make it obvious or (2) act indifferent to her advances and pursue other women. They both can get you the girl, though (1) is preferable; because once you become a friend in her eyes, you're basically fvcked, and (1) minimizes the chances of that happening.

 

[BrotherAP]

C'mon dude. So you're around these girls, and you find yourself liking them? That's no big surprise. Of course it's normal.

How do you know if they like you? When you know - you'll know. Just respect her boundaries, treat her like a lady. Show her you like her by making a grand gesture - try spelling out her name in rose scented candles, then write her a song about he she completes me.

Now say it with me: "Baby - you complete me"

OR...





























Ahahahahaha haha ha oohhh ok
Now, for real, read the DJ Bible. It will answer all of your questions and much, much more.

http://www.jbspencer.com/djb/

 

[Craig Reeves]

Hey RonJohn!

OK, your predicament sounds REALLY normal, man. LOL.

Let’s get down to business.

Here’s what going to have to happen FIRST.

You’re going to have to start treating the situation with OPTIMISM.

I always say that if YOU don’t know she WANTS YOU. She won’t either. Whenever are in situations like this one, where you are not sure whether a woman is into you or not - you must ALWAYS assume that she is. Read that again. Anytime a woman is giving you signals that you feel are mixed, you must ALWAYS assume that she wants you.

You are the MAN in this situation so you control the flow of the relationship.

The guys I know who are the absolute BEST with women treat every situation they get into with women with OPTIMISM -- they assume the woman they are dealing with WANTS them. This is the mindset and focus that they have.

As DJ’s we need to be focused on proof that a woman WANTS us rather than proof that a woman DOESN’T want us.

Remember - if she wasn’t into you - YOU’D KNOW IT! Women are much, much clearer about DIS-interest than interest.

So yeah man - she wants you….GO FOR IT!

 

[mactheripper]

Originally posted by Craig Reeves


Remember - if she wasn’t into you - YOU’D KNOW IT! Women are much, much clearer about DIS-interest than interest.

Hmm that's an interesting way of looking at things. I am likewise trying to ascertain whether a girl is interested or not.

 

[Wiesman44]

Funny, i usually say the exact opposite. When a girl is into me, I always know it.

The girls that don't blatenly show their IL are usually the type of girls I dont like. Shy , quiet girls I dont like and girls that take a long time to open up usually are weird like that.

If they're not gonna be sexual right away I'll find others.



Wanna know if she likes you ? Its quite a simple way of determining it. Freaking kiss her. You'll know instantly based on her reactions.