Girlfriends Past.......

[Fed X-Man]

Can anyone tell me why I should give a damn?? What's weird though is that there is a certain part of it that just won't leave me alone??? WTF is wrong with me?? She is the coolest chick and we are so much for each other it's awesome, but then the past takes a little shine off you know?? Been with her for almost two years and it has been great...damn who knows.

 

[cave dweller]

past?????????

Hey,

What is the problem with her past?

Was she a 'gang banger' slut or what?

cave dweller

 

[Fed X-Man]

Threesome with a couple we hang out with that she knew before I met her.....some things are adding up the way that guy has acted around us a few times.....avoiding them now at all times, but his wife and her are BF's. Just awkward you know?

 

[NewMan]

The only way to rectify this situation is to fvck her best F.

There is no point avoiding him/her - because they will not go away.

You at least have the power of knowing - as opposed to her not telling you....

So you've a number of choices...

Deal with it...
avoid it and situations...
Fvck the Best F....
Or possibly just come outright when your all together...


To some extent I'm against holding someone to the gun for something they did in their past (before they knew me).... but there are some situations that are plain stupid.... such as this one.

Any woman who goes out there and has a 3 some with their best freind and their best F's husband is stupid. It can only effect their subsequent relationship(s). Fair enough if it had been with some random guy - no big deal.... but this si a different case.

I'll be interested to hear other opinions.

 

[TizZle]

Past is past in my opinion. Look at what is happening in the present and make your own judgement. I wouldn't worry about it too much, but hey i'm not in your situation.

 

[Andromax]

Ahh ignorance is bliss... too bad you didn't know about it.


I wouldnt recommend bringing it up to them or her at all.

I wouldnt recommend fvcking the friend..

you gotta fvck the husband...

its the only way...

haha,


jk, seriously though,

you gotta just either accept it, and be okay with it,

or leave her cause it will eat you up and you wont ever be truly comfortable with her.

Hope you work something out.

 

[Fed X-Man]

Thanks for all the advice.....I am trying like hell not to let it get to me, but it is hard just because of the fact that she was at the LTR stage and now she's at the steady as we go stage. The whole story I got was kind of strange to begin with, but I know that I cannot sit here and pass judgement on her either as I am no damn saint myself, but it has gotten bad enough me thinking about it to where I logged on and found this site and am now talking to you guys about it.

Just can't shake that image though. Curiosity killed the AFC.

 

[tmpgstx]

Threesome with another couple? That would bug the shyte out of me, even if it was before me. She doesn't sound like the real commital type if you know what i mean - don't be too shocked if later down the road you find out she cheated on you.

 

[Fed X-Man]

It's weird man.....to me she seems legit.....cheating is not her nature, but I can tell that when she did have these 3-somes it always involved alcohol and she happened to be fresh out of a really bad marriage, but that to me is still no excuse. That to me is being weak-minded and lacking self esteem or worth for that matter.

She said she just wanted to do her thing with her BF, but then he would always work his way into the mix??? Of course he would!!! What AFC wouldn't............hell I don't know she's awesome I love her to death, but I just want that damn image to get out of my head.

I told her that I was cool with it even though she could tell I was annoyed by this, but then after the last 2 days I told her I was cool, but at work driving around delivering boxes and **** I keep going over it and that damn image...

I need to have her watch Chasing Amy, then maybe she will see where I'm at on this.....I'm cool, but I'm not.

Almost feels like Fingercuffs.

 

[FrankWank]

If her past is being a slut, then the past is still present and will continue in her future. There is nothing you can do about it, except move on. Dont make any excuses for her about all the b.s. etc..about excepting it, cuz your just making excuses and its a sign of your insecurities
IMO....her past means alot, and i will use it against her because i dont want to be with a slut in a LTR. sluts are for entertainment purposes only

 

[Fed X-Man]

Sucks.....too much of a double standard involved to pass judgement like that. Total catch22.

 

[cave dweller]

past.........

Fed ex,

A quote here:

'A picture of her past is a blueprint of her future.'

If she is a slut just use her and enjoy.

Dump her when you grow bored.

cave dweller

 

[dietzcoi]

Same Sh1t, different day.

Her past DOES matter for an LTR. Cave Dweller is right.

Too bad a lot of chumps on here are willing to put up with anything from a woman just to get laid.

Chilling.....

Dietzcoi

 

[JohnJones]

A lot of people dwell on these things as if new information or perspective is going to change things -- they are eternally in an "information gathering mode."

To move past this you need to make up your mind about whether it bothers you or you think its not appropriate or otherwise (personally, I would not be in an LTR with a woman who has done this kind of thing -- just screams low self esteem or shallow, you take your pick). I wouldn't bother dwelling or trying to get new facts, I would just decide -- am I having enough fun at the moment? If I'm not locked in (emotionally or otherwise) why bother getting excited about it?

 

[squirrels]

Let's put it this way...if you had been the GUY in the threesome would you have thought any less of her THEN??

Sometimes girls just wanna have fun. As long as she isn't doing it because of low self-esteem or she isn't doing it ALL THE TIME, then hell with it.

Just if you want a one-man woman, keep an eye on her for any misbehavior.

 

[cave dweller]

date.........er

Fed Ex,

Just date her if you want.

But, be ready to 'cut your losses' and run.

cave dweller

 

[smoke city]

does anybody wonder WHY this chick would tell the poor guy about her orgy with his friends??
I don't know man--I'm generally wary of women who want to "be open about sexual history"...(I actually had a girl tell me how she liked the way her previous boyfriend did her in the ass.) It does nothing but polarize you and create lots of drama (what she wants).
You should care because the fact that you know so much about her past is a HUGE red flag.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

There is nothing wrong with you - a hor's past is always taxing to a man's if he is considering to be "serious" with her. And only a fool would be "serious" with a hor!!! Read the thread on a "woman's sexual past" for further clarification!!!

"Women's sexual past"

 

[belividere]

I gotta agree with Newman first on this. Your girl is a moron. She had a 3-some with her "best-friend". That is retarted beyond the worst helmet-worthy.

But none of us are you. You need to decide for yourself if you can ever look past her previous indescretions.

At this point it is your call. You have to look her in the eyes and also are stuck hanging with the guy who ****ed her that way. Maybe your future can bring other girsl in the picture. None of us really know. Do whatever the hell you really feel and at this point given the info you have what difference does it make what anyone on this board says? Best of luck to you. I hope you choose the path that leads you to a long term happiness vs. immediate gratification.

 

[Blues]

Hey Dude

I know what you are going through cos i was once in your shoes. I was in the habit of being very suspicious of my gfs past and question everything in detail that i find ambigious. I wasnt a happy man and our reltionship took a beating. She didnt do anything out of this world but somehow i expected her to make all the perfect decisions when it comes to relationshiops/men. But looking back i didnt make the best of choices myself as well. No one is asking you to have a LTR with a HO, but ultimately time will tell the real kindof gilr yr gf is. You cant hide **** like this