Girlfriend too touchy feely

[TheHoff]

My girlfriend of a year has always been very friendly to everyone, however it is starting to get to me a bit. She is extremely touchy feely with everyone, and although it is completely innocent it is annoying. Particularly when out clubbing..... I've already addressed the issue with her many times and it usually results in a fight, she says that is just her personality and that I can't change her . It irritates me because she can be so naive in thinking that she is just being friendly, but IMO it is giving out false signals to other men that she likes them and degrades our relationship a little.

I would also like to stress before the haters come in that she is very faithful. Before my relationship with her she ad a 3 yr relationship and never cheated once.On top if that she is very honest with me about everything and says everything as it is. Am i too uptight? btw she is 22 and i am 21

This is very frustrating for me, because every other aspect of our relationship is flawless.

 

[trojanman88]

she is cheating...lol jk

 

[crossboss]

I'd just get her back

and touch other girls.

 

[TheHoff]

what age are you? thats a bit immature and definately not the type of relationship i want to be in

 

[crossboss]

I was

just joking. No just don't let it bother you, If she isn't taking it too far then relax.

 

[DJDamage]

What's her background? I know latin girls tend to be more touchy feely with everyone. She is what she is, either accept it or move on.

 

[TheHoff]

just joking. No just don't let it bother you, If she isn't taking it too far then relax.

no problem man..thanks for your input

 

[TheHoff]

she is irish, like me! yeah i know she is what she is, and it would be a shame to next her over something so small when we are so solid in other areas! i just think that she is disrespectful when she is out clubbing and has a few drinks! im an angry dude lol

 

[crossboss]

Yeah,

Just be laid back, because otherwise I think it pushes them away. I used to be like you. So I understand your feelings. Good that you are taking the advice.

 

[TheHoff]

thanks...any other opinions on the matter?

 

[penkitten]

some people are huggers, and they like to hug everyone for every reason. aww, its ok let me hug you. i missed you let me hug you...
there are people out there that are touchy feely...
they do not know personal boundaries.
they do not know they are invading your personal space, your so called bubble.
sometimes it is bothersome and you wanna snap and say "get off me. get outta my face. get outta my bubble."

the depaul school in louisville, teaches children with dyslexia and adhd to walk around the halls in hula hoops. you are not allowed to bump your hula hoop into anyone else's. this teaches personal space and boundaries.

so i say to all the touchy feely people out there, get a dang hula hoop and learn what space is considered yours and what space is considered someone else's. i am sorry that no one taught them before.

 

[LostAndConfused]

It's bad that your having fights with her over it, cuz it shows that you're in a power struggle with her right now. Although we all hate when our women are touchy feeley with other guys, you have to trust she won't actually do anything with her, and if she does, have the balls to dump her slutty ass. just calm down, and be touchey feeley with other girls, but DO NOT DO IT TO GET BACK AT HER. She'll see right through it. As long as your calm, and chill with other girls too, she really can't say anything...because she does it too, haha.

 

[DonJuan11]

My girlfriend of a year has always been very friendly to everyone, however it is starting to get to me a bit. She is extremely touchy feely with everyone, and although it is completely innocent it is annoying. Particularly when out clubbing..... I've already addressed the issue with her many times and it usually results in a fight, she says that is just her personality and that I can't change her . It irritates me because she can be so naive in thinking that she is just being friendly, but IMO it is giving out false signals to other men that she likes them and degrades our relationship a little.

Run with that. I never undestand people when they say the relationship is awesome except for one thing their sweet girlfriend does that annoys them immensely. If you really loved a girl and she told you to put your shoes on the left side of the door instead of the right side, would you constantly put them on the right side to annoy her? Then say "its my personality and I can't change, deal with it." That doesn't sound like love, that sounds like you want out of the relationship.

When I wanted out of a relationship, I would purposely do something to annoy my partner and say "I can't help it, it's just who I am, deal with it."

When I wanted to stay in, I would compromise and never annoy the girl by doing something I know gets her upset.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

1. Tell her how you feel. (I guess when you do this you get into a fight?)

2. Some girls are just flirty like that. Even mine is like that sometimes. Just learn to deal with it.

3. Be touchy feely with other girls yourself.

4. If you really can't stand it... dump her... (last resort)

 

[dynamicallyidle]

Here is some sound advice.

First of all, this only happens in clubs / pubs right? You have to really ask yourself if her behavior is the kind of thing that ruins your night. If it truly does, you have two options:

---------------

1) Change your internal feelings about her behavior. No matter what your brain may think, your gut mistrusts her when she is touching other guys. Really reflect on which is right: your subconscious, or you. If you're mind is right, then change your emotional reaction to her behavior. This will not be easy, and will take a lot of time, patience and practice.

OR

2) Simply stop going out to clubs and pubs with her. Change the way you guys chill.

---------------

You have to understand that girls will not change in a situation like this - the majority of girls at that age do not have the self-control to change their fundamental behaviors. You must count on yourself to change.

This issue you bring up is not trivial. Her touchy-feeliness is an integral part of her personality. Would you date a girl who was unhappy all the time? No. So why would you date a girl who is too touchy-feely with other men?

Look into your heart and good luck.

 

[young_gun]

Don't worry about it. I'd much rather have a touchy-feely girl than a girl who's uptight and non-affectionate. It seems like it's just part of her personality. If she hasn't cheated on you, and didn't cheat on her last bf, I'd say she's a trustworthy girl and a good match for you.

By the way, if a girl EVER cheats on you, that is blatant DISRESPECT and you should get away from her FAST.