"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Girlfriend checks out guys in front of me

Innovator

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Hi guys,

I'm not going to lie; I check out women around me, but I don't do it in a blatant way in front of my girlfriend.

So, sometimes when we go out, I catch my gf looking at other men. I have called her out on it saying "you should go get his number ;) & I'll get a new girl's number too." She usually smiles and says she doesn't want me to go. She says she loves me & actually shows it trough her behavior (cooks for me, comes over all the time, secks whenever I want, etc.). This situation really bothers me & I want to know how some of you have handled a similar girl. I talked to her about it last night & she said "I look because they're cute or have nice muscles, but it doesn't mean I'll date them."

I'm pretty ready to let this girl go, as I see this behavior as low interest. She was verbally and physically abused as a child & really enjoys attention (maybe what she didn't get from her parents). She claims to have had only one sex partner & I believe it, as she had no idea what to do he first time we banged.

I know it's inpossible to have a girl be completely focused on you without being aware of her surroundings, so maybe I am overthinking this situation. Yet on the other hand, she does it so blatantly that I can't stand it, even with my friends. I'm slightly overweight & feel insecure whenever fit guys are around, including my friends. I'm in the process of creating a fitness plan & would appreciate any tips. It's time to ge rid of this insecurity.
 
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"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Konada

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Guys check out girls all the time..Likewise is a natural thing for girls to check out guys as well. Get over it and most importantly get your sh!t together.
 
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It’s natural to notice other attractive people, but in my experience it is not normal for a woman to be blatant about it. When a woman is really into you she’s not going to be looking at other guys. Unless you’re a supermodel, women just aren’t going to be checking you out when they aren’t single.

For example, I’m a muscular and good looking guy, but women will break eye contact with me quickly when they’re out with their man. Of course that happens too when they’re alone, but it’s virtually 100% of the time when they’re with a man. You can see a woman’s eyes look at you, go down, back up, and then at you again when she’s checking you out, and that just doesn’t happen when they’re hanging on their man’s arm. She instinctively knows to look away because she’s not wanting to give you that signal even if she does find you to be an attractive guy.

If she really is checking out other guys when she’s with you, then I’d say you’re probably better off ending whatever it is you have with her. Either she’s not that into you, you’re boring her, or she’s not a loyal woman. Get in the practice of rejecting women when they clearly deserve it. Being a woman does not mean she’s allowed to get away with being rude or disrespectful.

I’ve found it helpful to write out a list of behaviors and qualities that you will not accept from a woman, and what your response will be. For example, if a woman cancels or flakes on a first date I will not tell her “it’s okay”, I will not ask her to reschedule, and if she asks to reschedule I will tell her that I’m free for the time we scheduled or that she can call me in a few weeks. Doesn’t matter how hot she is or how much I think I’d like her that will be my response. Doesn’t have to be an exact script, the idea is just to know where your limits are ahead of time so you don’t start rationalizing a woman’s bad behavior because she’s cute.
 

yun-j

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RecoveringNiceGuy said:
If she really is checking out other guys when she’s with you, then I’d say you’re probably better off ending whatever it is you have with her.
Its only ever ok if you both check someone out then look at each other and smile because they are striking.

What about the women who checks out other men when the partner has their back turned? She is doing it undercover. What does it say about this type of woman?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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G_Govan

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Please stop this. Let her look and pretend you don't notice.

Enjoy your time with her but spin plates.
 

C-quenced

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Let's cut through the bull**** and straight down to the source. The reasons why she's doing this are:

a) she's a ho. She says she's only been with one guy sexually but she's not telling you about the other guys she probably sucked off. Just forget about what she told you. This ho already thinks she can do better than you. The second her type of guy comes around and spits some decent game on her she'll be on his **** regardless of whether you're with her or not.

b) she has low interest

C) she doesn't give a ****I

This ***** doesn't owe you any ounce of loyalty. There's no ring on her finger. But guess what? Neither do you. Go **** other/superior women.

Also, stop letting these *****es disrespect you. Tell her to get the **** out of your face and don't ever see/talk to her ever again. All the idiots talking about how since its natural for guys to stare at girls then it must be natural for girls to do the same are projecting male sexuality at women. They're not the same.
 

BMX

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Then it's time that you verbally hit on women in front of her. Do it now.
 

sharkbeat

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Are you buffed?

Are you good looking?

What do you wear when you go out with her?

Although women don't sometime comment on how you look, they take notice, and put you on a scale of 1-10 subconsciously all the time. When she's blatantly checking other guys out, you have dropped to a 5 and that guy at least an 8 to her. You are no longer fun and engaging to her, and you are not that physically attractive that she's drooling over other men.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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yungballa

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She's checking out guys in your presence? That's mighty disrespectful. If I were you, I'd drop her in a heart beat. That's probably what's in your best interest, unless of course you wanna keep a girl around who's disrespecting you.

Just my 2 cents, pal.
 

RangerMIke

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You have two choices....

(1) Dump her, not my choice.

(2) Ask her if she's interested in a three way, and point out some other hot women you see.

Trust me option 2 is much more fun. If she says no, go ahead and dump her.
 

foreverAFC

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im a pretty horny guy and even i have enough self control to stop myself from checking out other women when im with a girl i like, if a woman cant keep herself from doing it she is either dumb as a rock or isnt turned on by you physically
 

Bible_Belt

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Ask her if she's interested in a three way

I was thinking sorta the same thing, except telling her to go talk to the guy she was looking at for a MFM threesome. I am yet to have a woman call my bluff on that suggestion. It's a polite, discreet way of telling her she's being a wh0re.
 

DonJuanit0

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Bible_Belt said:
Ask her if she's interested in a three way

I was thinking sorta the same thing, except telling her to go talk to the guy she was looking at for a MFM threesome. I am yet to have a woman call my bluff on that suggestion. It's a polite, discreet way of telling her she's being a wh0re.
I've been away from this website for so long and still, I come back to find you give precious answers! ^^
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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DonJuanit0

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Bible_Belt said:
Ask her if she's interested in a three way

I was thinking sorta the same thing, except telling her to go talk to the guy she was looking at for a MFM threesome. I am yet to have a woman call my bluff on that suggestion. It's a polite, discreet way of telling her she's being a wh0re.
I've been away from this website for so long and still, I come back to find you give precious answers! ^^
 

Alvafe

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I will tell what a friend of mine did when his girlfriend(at the time) was looking to another guy, the guy was wearing a air force uniform(the girl target).

he notice his GF was looking at the guy, he took the girl to the guy and said to him, hey my girl was checking you out, and I find you cute too so please know each other, he leave her there, it didn't take long for her go after him angry and complaining, he just said he is not a idiot to tolerate that kind of behavior, after that the girl don't even looked side ways.

the real question here is why you want a female like that around you? lack of options?
 

zinc4

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The only correct answer is to dump her. My god she us seriously fantasizing hard core about other guys. I am a total dig and still don't check out other girls where my gf can see it and guess what I'm cheating on my girl. Your girl is already likely cheating or will be soon.

If I was you I would reverse the situation and dump her. Check out and hit on.other women in front of her....when she complains or says anything say I'm sorry...I just don't feel anything for you anymore...sorry if I hurt you, but this will be good for you in the long run.

Turn the tables and dump her now.
 

Building_and_Loan

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She's dating you while still playing the field. Been there, it sucks.

She won't swing from her current branch until she has her hands firmly on the next one.

However, my advice will differ from the others IF this girl is LTR/wife material. You have to decide if she is or not, and whether or not you want to keep her or move on. If you do like her and want to keep her, you gotta work on yourself to re-atttact her to you as if you just started dating her again.

Her looking at other guys is a sign of low interest, so you'll need to raise her interest level if you're intent on keeping her. Girls aren't like your bros, they won't stay with you no matter what. Once you start to stagnate and gain weight, they'll start to loom elsewhere, subconsciously or not.

Statt working out 3 days a week. No exceptions. Start running and make it a goal to do a 10K within 3 months. Take a backpacking trip without her for a week. Join a professional networking group or start taking some kind of class to improve yourself.

These types of things will most imporantly make you a better person, and a byproduct will be that she'll get atttacted to you all over again without realizing why. And if she does leave you for some other guy, well you probably would have already found a few new prospects by then anyway.
 

zinc4

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No....just dump her.....don't ever tolerate this treatment... Dump her then start working out...and once a girl is really crazy about you...even if you gain a little weight she still won't be looking elsewhere... Bottom line is her interest level is low and was likely low from the beginning...

But do hit up the gym and get a good body to attract new girls...but dump thus one immediately...
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

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