"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Girlfriend Advice

SpacemanP

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Me and my GF are both 16. She is a virgin(but has done some sexual things before).
We have been in a relationship for nearly two months now but i have not
been able to do anything very sexual with her.
When we make out she has no problem with me stroking her breasts etc and she is very used to my touch.

A couple of days ago when i slid my hand down her pants she drew it back out without speaking.

What would be the best way to react to this?/How long should i wait to try again or should i wait till she initiates?

Do you have any tips to help my build a sexual relationship with her/ tips to create a more sexual mood when we make out.

Obviously i know that it is normal for her to be this way and i am not irritated at her reaction. And it is important for me that she is comfortable with what we do together.
Do you have any tips for building this kind of comfort?

Sorry about the length, thanks for reading.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Five To One

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You have to be able to turn her on with her thinking your not doing anything over the line. Theres a couple things you could try. Ill write about them when i have a little more time if you want.

Also, last time I was stopped by a girl in a similair situation, I stopped everything and called her out on it in a joking way. "did you really just do that?"... Instead of pretending it didnt happen, we ended up talking about it for a couple minutes and she became much more confortable with me
 

Four_Aces

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Five To One said:
You have to be able to turn her on with her thinking your not doing anything over the line.
Exactly. You have to get her so worked up, she totally forgets about her "hang-ups" about doing sexual things with you, and things will naturally escalate. Have you gotten her naked yet?

Two months is a really long time. I would consider two months to be the MAXIMUM I would wait for a virgin. What do you think could be causing her to put the sexual relationship on hold?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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intrextrovert

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try rubbing your knee in her vag and dont go straight for it, go down slowly and go around.
 

SpacemanP

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Four_Aces said:
What do you think could be causing her to put the sexual relationship on hold?
Especially round here thats quite normal. Most girls her age (16-17) have had 1 or no sexual partners, there are some "wild girls" but she is not one of them lol. They all "like to wait" at least a couple of months before giving it up. I know its crazy, its just them "not wanting to feel like sluts".

It is very frustrating because we just make out for hours and then she wont let it go further. I get some pretty awful blue balls, should i tell her?

She is very good looking. Like 9-10 but you are right and i can not really see myself hanging round much longer if she wont take it further.
 

Four_Aces

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SpacemanP said:
Especially round here thats quite normal. Most girls her age (16-17) have had 1 or no sexual partners, there are some "wild girls" but she is not one of them lol. They all "like to wait" at least a couple of months before giving it up. I know its crazy, its just them "not wanting to feel like sluts".

It is very frustrating because we just make out for hours and then she wont let it go further. I get some pretty awful blue balls, should i tell her?

She is very good looking. Like 9-10 but you are right and i can not really see myself hanging round much longer if she wont take it further.
So you live in a small town? Why do most girls around your town want to wait that long? If that's the case ... I honestly would suggest you wait for her.

I know it can be really frustrating to just makeout for 3 hours and then not **** her. But maybe there's some other way you can work up to sex -- how do you think she would feel about you giving her a hand job, or oral?

She seems like a very decent girl. If you can see yourself with her for a while, I think it's okay to wait for her. Take is slow... and you'll be able to take her virginity. That's something she will remember for the rest of her life.

It all really depends on how much you like her as a person - and since you've stayed with her this long... I'd recommend staying the course, and be with her until it happens.
 

SpacemanP

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Four_Aces said:
So you live in a small town? Why do most girls around your town want to wait that long? If that's the case ... I honestly would suggest you wait for her.

I know it can be really frustrating to just makeout for 3 hours and then not **** her. But maybe there's some other way you can work up to sex -- how do you think she would feel about you giving her a hand job, or oral?

She seems like a very decent girl. If you can see yourself with her for a while, I think it's okay to wait for her. Take is slow... and you'll be able to take her virginity. That's something she will remember for the rest of her life.

It all really depends on how much you like her as a person - and since you've stayed with her this long... I'd recommend staying the course, and be with her until it happens.
Thanks for the advice man, and yeah thats just the way things are round here. Sucks don't it?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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SpacemanP

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How would I go about getting her to give a BJ/Hand job do you reckon? Does anyone have any tips for this sort of situation?
 

Drewskie

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Well, I'm not sure what the other gents are talking about, 16 is still damn young and most 16 year olds I know are still virgins. The other poster was right, you just have to get her hott enough that she will be ready to go for it. The best way, if you haven't tried it already is while you are making out for your 3 hours, start kissing her in other places. The best I have found are the ears, (slowly and gently), the neck obviously, and surprisingly, massaging and kissing her wrists, yes wrists, will get her going. I alos like the technique of a massage all over, just start at the shoulders, back, etc. and work your way down. When you get to parts of her body covered with clothing, just take it off. Don't rip it off like a madman, just slowly so that you can massage her skin easier. All the while you can kiss her wherever yoou are massing, back, shoulders, etc. This has worked for me a few times. As far as getting her to beej you up, I think you have a better chance hitting it. Most virgins are afraid of the penis for a while. But if you insist, while you are making out, you can put her hand on your shaft and hope she goes with it. If you are close enough with her that you won't feel like a perv, when your in the middle of your 3 hr. session, start touching your own cack, but not like you would if she wasn't around, just kinda rubbing and stuff......when she asks wtf you are doing, just say that since she won't you had to yourself. You must say this jokingly and know her enough to know she won't freak out. This will work, depending on the girl. good luck.
 
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