Rint said:
I asked her to be my gf and she said she had lots of feelings for the other guy.
You asking her to be your girlfriend was a mistake.
It's generally a good idea to let the girl bring up "relationship" talk.
You should have just continued seeing her,continued making her attracted to and interested in you,and continued strengthening the connection you two had together.
If you had just exercized a little more patience,there's a good chance
she would have been the one trying to get you to commit to her.
You say that she told you she had feelings for this other guy. That may be true,but even with that being the case,she
still went out with and got
still involved with you.
My guess is that she went out with you because there's something missing with this other guy.
Nevertheless,you
still shouldn't have asked her to be your girlfriend just yet.
Rint said:
I peaced out and a week later she texted me and came to see me and started crying and saying how she felt like we had a really special connection and how she missed me and didn't like cing me with another girl.
I wouldn't put too much stock into her talk about "connections" and "how she feels".
She said the same thing about this other guy and her so-called "feelings" didn't prevent her from going out with you.
And her saying that she doesn't like you seeing other girls....you know what I'd say to her about that?
TOUGH.
She doesn't want
you seeing other girls,while she has "feelings" for another guy?
TOUGH.
That's
her problem.
She's trying to have her cake and eat it too,and in the process of this,it'll make a complete
FOOL out of YOU.
Personally,I'd tell this chick to GET LOST.
She's trying to make you a "SPARE TIRE". She's trying to keep you on "standby" while she's getting it on with this other guy.
I HATE when girls do this,BUT she couldn't do it without YOUR COOPERATION.
You titled this thread,"Girl has too much power over me",but it should be titled,"
I GAVE my power away to this girl".
This nonsense could be over with in a SECOND.
It's YOU who's doing this. You just need to have a willingness to walk away,to SERIOUSLY walk away.
You need to demonstrate to her that you're a MAN,that you're 100% whole,complete,and happy WITHOUT her.
You asked her to be your girlfriend,and she said no....
twice,yet YOU continue being around and hanging around her.
You
unintentionally showed her that you're willing to settle for what you truely DON'T WANT.
And that's bad.
If you would have walked away and continue seeking for a girlfriend,which is what you REALLY want,she would have seen you're a real MAN who doesn't settle for less.
She would have look at you as a MAN. If she sees that you'd rather end things ALL TOGETHER than to keep hanging around her for the bits and scraps of little sexual affection she uses to keep you hooked,her attraction for you would have skyrocketed.
How many guy do you think she runs into who'd turn down her sexual "bait" to pursue what they
really want? Not many I'd guess.
So you would have stood out. That would have made YOU special in her eyes and DEFINATELY would have put you above that other guy.
Well nevermind now.
Rint said:
So we got back together for a week than I asked her to b exclusive, but not a couple and she said no because everything was a mess and she didn't feel it was right.
She didn't "feel" it was right. You mean right for you and her to become exclusive.
So she doesn't "feel" it's right for you and her to get into a relationship,but at the same time she doesn't want YOU seeing other girls.
And ALL THIS
WHILE she has these "feelings" for this other guy.
Well? So what do you plan to do here?
Are you going to let this girl,who has feelings for another dude,who REFUSES to date you,make you stay ALONE simply because she doesn't like you seeing other girls?
Rint said:
Than the day after that I told her I didn't wanna take the idea off the table yet and she agreed.
Of course she's not going to take it off the table,that's how she keeps you hooked.
The "hope" for a relationship is the carrot she has dangling in front of your face.
It's like a mirage in the desert. As soon as you think you're making progress and getting close to it,it disappears.
Everything you're doing now is only ENSURING that's she'll NEVER become your girlfriend.