“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Girl who prefers BBM/gchat over phone...why?

Yachtie

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My "lady friend" of about three months with only a handful of dates but an apparent commitment to me likes to talk with me on bbm and gchat, but never on the phone. Anyone else with a similar problem? Is this the new way?

Backstory:

I love and hate Blackberry Messenger (BBM). The "D" and "R" can be killers.

Three months ago this girl approached me on the dance floor at a bar that I rarely visit. I can't remember what she said at first (it was loud and I had beer-muffs on). We exchanged business cards (like adults, except that I slipped it into the back pocket of her very tight jeans with a brief gentle touch). She smiled and was taken aback by that approach but seemed to like it. I'm a bit hazy on what we talked about or how it got to that, but it apparently went over well.

The lights came on about 10 minutes later and we all spilled out onto the street. We rendezvoused outside when she was standing there with four of her guy friends. I introduced myself to all of them with a firm handshake and eye contact. Somehow she went home with me and slept over. Lots of kissing, no penetration; she even left her jeans on. I drove her to her friend's place the next morning.

About a day or two later she texted me. We linked up on BBM and facebook and chatted by BBM and gchat a bit. We hung out a few times with other mutual friends, but didn't sleep together the second time. She invited me to come visit her city (1.5 hrs away) for dinner. I showed up with no gift/flower/wine; I know, rookie move but maybe it's ok in hindsight. After dinner we went back to her place for wine and 420 (both at her suggestion). Slept over, digital penetration on her.

She visits me the next time (sleep over, no sex, brown-out) and forgets her phone charger. I mail it to her, but include a note: "you know this defeats the purpose of a leave-behind, right?" She BBMs me to say how cute it was, and says we can hang out again minus leave-behinds.

Next time, back in her town, I bring 3 flowers + small bottle of wine. After dinner, she offers to split the check and explains she doesn't expect the guy to pay all the time, but I said she could pay for the next one -- with a wink/smile. Back at her place, she talks about what we can do together during the forthcoming winter. Yada yada yada, I sleep over again, mostly kissing/me massaging her/digital pen.

The ISSUE: I haven't been able to get her to talk with me on the phone, and I've done most of the initial chatting. Only BBM and gchat. I asked her (via BBM) if she knew that her blackberry can make calls. She laughed and said she was going to think about it (seemed sarcastic). Still no phone chats. What is this all about?

In person, the last time we hungout, I mentioned something about it. She said "I dunno, you live kinda far, this might not work out" and then smiled/laughed (we don't live that far apart) and we made out (for the rest of the night).

Side ISSUE: the self restraint against BBM'ing, gchatting, or calling her is INCREDIBLY challenging. I'm going to try to give it a couple days, including a weekend. How do you guys handle the pressure? I'm cursed with being feverously jealous and "emotionally needy." I don't want to screw this one up (she's smoking hot and very nice), so I'm reading the $hit out of this site.

Is this the age we live in? Does everyone really only want to talk when we're apart via electronics?

PPS: she hasn't touched my junk with her hands/mouth yet. should i keep taking this as a good sign that she's not a slut? previous BFs for her were 2, 2, and 5 yrs each and she lived with the last two respectively.

thanks for reading...
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

handle

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I see a lot of potential problems here, namely that she lives a while away (do you really want to put in that effort right now?) and that it's been 3 months. Just want to mention those. Far away. 3 months. Not much has happened.

As for this being "the way" -- I dunno man, never dated someone who lived further away. A lot of people aren't phone talkers these days. Don't really know why. Also I've never really dated anyone I didn't sleep with first. I get this feeling that you're getting strung along. But to each his own -- perhaps you feel like this is worth pursuing.
 

Yachtie

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thanks -- i have guy friends with girls in the same city as well as other friends there, and she has friends in my town, so it's really not a problem distance wise.

The three months were strung out with only a few dates by each of us having other stuff to do, primarily me (sports).

i understand you think i might be strung along... what gives you that? for every time we've hung out, only once did we not sleep in the same bed, but we haven't done the deed yet either.
 

The Mad Ghost

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Because its comforting. A retard can lower you to their level of intelligence by just BB'ing and texting, however on the phone, it may not always be in the retards favor. Its a frame thing, sometimes. A retard won't BB there boss, employer or girlfriend(s) - unless it says ''Call me now/back x''.

The retard has WMD at their disposal, modern day technology has the retard on an all time high of God Mode of all fronts. To be a retard, is to also be a coward. To clearly classify an evolved retarded coward, is you text them for a short period of time, then call them, to see if they answer, if they don't answer it and text you back with some retarded excuse for not answering, you have just interacted with an evolved retard.
 

badboyjmm

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The Mad Ghost said:
Because its comforting. A retard can lower you to their level of intelligence by just BB'ing and texting, however on the phone, it may not always be in the retards favor. Its a frame thing, sometimes. A retard won't BB there boss, employer or girlfriend(s) - unless it says ''Call me now/back x''.

The retard has WMD at their disposal, modern day technology has the retard on an all time high of God Mode of all fronts. To be a retard, is to also be a coward. To clearly classify an evolved retarded coward, is you text them for a short period of time, then call them, to see if they answer, if they don't answer it and text you back with some retarded excuse for not answering, you have just interacted with an evolved retard.

+1 So true
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Zarky

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Lotta problems here, and your medium of communications isn't one of them.

-You're dating a chick who lives 100 miles away.
-You're traveling to see her.
-You're bringing her flowers?? You only buy a girl flowers after she's caught you boning some other girl. That's what flowers are for.
-You haven't screwed her yet. "Digital penetration" FTL
-She's calling all the shots.

Text messaging is the thing these days, and we're all going to have to deal with it. There have been some long term relationships I've had where we NEVER spoke on the phone. It was all email, text, and in-person. No phone, ever.

One of the problems is that everyone has cell phones and the damn things have a little 1/2-second delay when you're trying to talk. It's incredibly annoying and makes conversations awkward. So I too avoid it when I can.

You've got to start dating other chicks and reducing the time and effort you're putting into this one. DATE OTHER CHICKS.

PPS: she hasn't touched my junk with her hands/mouth yet. should i keep taking this as a good sign that she's not a slut?
All girls are sluts. Just not always with you ;)
 

Boilermaker

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Zarky said:
Lotta problems here, and your medium of communications isn't one of them.

-You're dating a chick who lives 100 miles away.
-You're traveling to see her.
-You're bringing her flowers?? You only buy a girl flowers after she's caught you boning some other girl. That's what flowers are for.
-You haven't screwed her yet. "Digital penetration" FTL
-She's calling all the shots.

Text messaging is the thing these days, and we're all going to have to deal with it. There have been some long term relationships I've had where we NEVER spoke on the phone. It was all email, text, and in-person. No phone, ever.

One of the problems is that everyone has cell phones and the damn things have a little 1/2-second delay when you're trying to talk. It's incredibly annoying and makes conversations awkward. So I too avoid it when I can.

You've got to start dating other chicks and reducing the time and effort you're putting into this one. DATE OTHER CHICKS.



All girls are sluts. Just not always with you ;)

Zarky, I dig your style man! You are what I want to be when I am 35 :D

:yes:
 

Mike32ct

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I'm not sure why you haven't gone all the way yet. During kissing, have you tried getting in top of her and grinding / dry humping her? A long makeout and dry humping session in bed should leave her begging for penetration.

Otherwise she is only marginally attracted and/or it's a power move on her part.
 

Yachtie

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iliketennis was right. Her contact frequency went way up after banging her.

She said she liked me because I didn't play games. I think: 1) I'm not gaming right, 2) she doesn't know her own good.

as for her using text to control and be a retard behind the safety of text/bbm --- she's very 'on' when we talk in person and when we have talked on the phone (since opening this thread), so i don't that theory, though well considered, applies here.

thanks for the feedback guys.
 
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