"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Girl w/ boyfriend says "I want you"

fbplayer06

Don Juan
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Lest this girl turn out like the one in my other post, I've come here for advice.

I hung out with this girl last summer a couple times and all we did was make out. When I presented the idea of she and I being something more serious during the summer, I think I scared her away. She and I stopped speaking to each other.

Then, last Saturday, I get a text from her and it turns out "she didn't have my number in her phone [anymore]" but somehow texted me anyway. I jokingly told her that the gods must have dialed it to encourage a fresh start between us this summer, but then I checked her facebook and saw she has a boyfriend. I proceeded to tell her "nvm...have a nice weekend" and forget about her.

Last night, out of no where on her part, the following conversation occured:

Her 7/1/09 1:40 AM
Hey

Me (pissed b/c his phone woke him up just as he was about to drift away to comfortable sleep...) 7/1/09 1:42 AM
It’s ****ing 1:45am...what do u want

Her 7/1/09 1:54 AM
okay nevermind. Sorry

Me (still annoyed and aware she could be drunk (inb4lolwut on a tuesday?!), but curious nevertheless) 7/1/09 1:55 AM
Well don’t be sorry...if u had something to say, say it.

Her 7/1/09 1:56 AM
I just wanted to know how you were and what was up

Her 7/1/09 1:58 AM
Because like I want you and I like you, but if you are not into this then I dont need to be either

Her 7/1/09 2:00 AM
And I have no idea what emotional intimacy means to you

Me (o_0) 7/1/09 2:10 AM
I thot I made it clear 2 u last summer that I wanted 2 b more than just friends w/ u, emotionally & physically. but u have some1 now so I dont know what 2 say..

Marlee 7/1/09 2:11 AM
I was with you last summer but I didn’t know what to say or do because it was all new to me and you were emotionally unpredictable

Me [no response]

...

Me 7/1/09 2:18 PM, to her on facebook (message)
"haha deleting stati ftw :p

anyway, you wanna tell me what last night's correspondence was all about? because, like you said, if you're not into it then I dont need to be either..."


SO I know this might have all been tl/dr, but my question is how to deal with this situation considering she has a boyfriend. She's known as having lots of friends (a social butterfly, you could say), so I don't want to end up being just another one of her male attention-givers. I want to be more than friends with her (because frankly she's a very cool person on the inside and very sexy on the outside) or nothing at all. I refuse to be 2nd (or 3rd or 4th) to her current boyfriend, but I obviously don't want to break this news to her as bluntly as I'm typing it here.

What should I do/say? Advice is appreciated; thanks. ^_^
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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fbplayer06

Don Juan
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Joe Stud said:
fb material if u want. nothing more
So assuming she doesn't have the morality of a wh0re and she won't break up with her boyfriend anytime soon, how should I go about capitalizing on her obvious feelings for me and bang her? HALP!
 

Joe Stud

Master Don Juan
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Next time u anticipate that she is out with her girlfriends, text her: "Just left jimmys tavern, it's dead. Are you out? Buy me a drink!" Hopefully she invites you to join them, and work it. Be cool, be a DJ. Dont lean in to hear what she's (or any of her friends are) saying, stand your ground and speak with authority... with a little C&F mixed in. i'm not much on dancing, but I hear it works well. Be cool.
 

PSYCHO

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Never trust the ho!! She's a Betrayer!!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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