"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Girl trying to put me on display

DJ naruto

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Okay guys heres the speil.

I've gone out with this hot, curvy girl :D two times-- both smashing times if i might say so-- and now she wants to put me on display.

I organized our first two dates and paid for one while she paid for the other. This time around she invited me on a date, and said that she wanted the date to be a suprise. Just tonight she emails me inviting me to a " After work event for professionals" at her school. I'm assuming that most of her friends will be there, and that she wants to showcase me. Now, I'm thinking two dates and she already wants to put me on display, WTF. Moreover, by going I believe I'll have to endure numerous unnecessary **** tests:( .

Maybe, I'm overanalyzing this and should just go. Candid opinions guys? Should I just say No? :confused:
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Engetsu

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If you're genuinely interested and want to keep dating her, you'll be meeting those friends sooner or later. If you think something will develop between the both of you, go on right ahead. It will give you a good opportunity to see if you can keep on seeing that curvy chick, because someone's friends can tell a lot about who they are, and they will be (and are) a very determining factor in her life. That way, you'll be wasting less time.

If you just want to do her and move on.... Well I wouldn't advise you going, it would be just pointless because you can't get any game on and will be wasting time being social with other people while you could put the focus on the hottie on a one-on-one encounter.
 

Don_Marko

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Props on recognizing this dilema! Great question! Most people would just go without thinking....

Guy above me broke it down for you pretty nicely... I would just add this... go if you don't got anything better to do on that night. Usually I would say when in doubt DO NOT GO
 

Cremasta

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Originally posted by DJ naruto
Now, I'm thinking two dates and she already wants to put me on display, WTF. Moreover, by going I believe I'll have to endure numerous unnecessary **** tests:(
You're looking at this the wrong way, this is a golden opportunity!
1. You are probably going to get lots of free drinks and food (you'll notice I put this first) :)
2. You can go there and charm the pants of every other girl there, because at this stage you are 'just friends' out having fun together.
3. If you do a good job, all of her friends and associates will be in her ear saying "where DID you find him? is he your bf?" - your social value and value to her a potential partner/bf/casual shag will have gone through the roof.
4. If it's crap, you can just walk out and go home and never see these people again.

Plus, she is obviously showing you off, which, unless you already guessed... is a GOOD thing.

Where's the downside here? If it works well then she'll be putty in your hands, if it doesn't, then you've gotten some game practice in and potentially a few more phone numbers.

Cheers
 

Skweints

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I agree with Cremasta. I wouldn't take the fact that she'll want to introduce you to her friends personal at all. Being on good terms with a girl is good, but being on good terms with her friends is always MUCH better.

Consider this, say things go well for a while and you become exclusive... then all of a sudden, you two get into a fight and stop talking for a while. When she's not talking to you, she's talking to her friends. If her friends don't like you, they're gonna tell her "Hey, don't worry about it. He was an ******* anyways. There's better men out there." now, if you're good with her friends, it's going to work in your favor. And even still, if she decides to be stubborn, and not listen to her friends... you can bet her friends will be VERY willing to console you and try to get a foot in. ;)

Now, I try and give the LTR approach. If you're in it for the long run, you might as well go through with it. You'll learn a lot about her, just by the people she hangs around with. There's really no lose-lose situation to this. If you manage to make it a successful night, you'll definitely enjoy a huge confidence boost.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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rappermas

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LOL, she's trying to make herself look better.

"Look gals, I can bag guys like this!"
 

BGMan

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She probably will be like, "Hey, everybody, check out my new BF!"

Is that a problem?

BGMan
 

smoke city

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Originally posted by DJ naruto
Okay guys heres the speil.

Now, I'm thinking two dates and she already wants to put me on display, WTF. Moreover, by going I believe I'll have to endure numerous unnecessary **** tests:( .

Maybe, I'm overanalyzing this and should just go. Candid opinions guys? Should I just say No? :confused:
Come on. You sound like a girl.
Do whatever the **** you want. If you don't want to go, tell her you want to do something else.

Oh, and YES you are overanalyzing.
 
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