Girl: My BF and I just broke up

[PDubb75]

I have run into this a few times lately, and I have tried some different methods to see how they worked, but no solid outcome to give me a good enough idea about this.

A girl you approach tells you during your conversation that her and boyfriend recently broke up. How do you generally play that? I can't even tell if it's a sign of interest or not.

One of the girls who said it to me, it was fairly obvious she mentioned it because it's been on her mind and bothering her. I could tell from the start she seemed a little upset. Still got a make out and her number. Another girl just randomly threw it in as if she was talking about the weather. I couldn't tell if this was more her way of saying "I am single" or "leave me alone... here is some drama in my life that should scare you off".

Do you generally address the issue if it's brought up? I usually try to stay off of subjects regarding ex b/f's. I won't even ask girls I'm dating about their ex. It means nothing to me, so why get him on their mind?

Curious how you all handle that comment in an approach.

 

[TRSX]

Control the frame.

Any part of a conversation you don't like.. it's as easy as just changing the subject into something you DO like. Don't be phased by anything a girl says..

All you hear in your head is "I just broke up with my boyfriend so now I can get really crazy sucking your ****"

Also, i read a good piece of advice that no matter what you always ALWAYS assume a girl likes you. Even if she doesn't.. this makes you feel like you are the prize, and not some sloppy seconds.

 

[SoSuave666]

Yep I ran into this once. I got a good vibe from the girl but she mentioned she broke up with her boyfriend a week ago. I could tell SHE initiated the breakup because it kind of just rolled off her tongue, much like your second girl. Something tells me your first girl who was kinda depressed about it got dumped.

Anyway here's how I dealt with it.

Her: I just broke up with my boyfriend actually, about a week ago.

Me: Ah, well I could be your next ex boyfriend if you'd like.

Her: Why would I want another ex! That doesn't make any sense.

Me: Don't get me wrong...we'd have a great honeymoon stage and an extremely passionate secks life. But then you'd begin to resent me because of my dominating bravado and I'd start to notice how controlling and clingy you inevitably would become. I had no idea you were so needy!

It went pretty smoothly from there. Now I don't remember if that's exactly how I said it, but the main points are there. She turned into a plate for about 3 months until, miraculously, she began to want a relationship. Turns out I was right.

I guess the gist of it is to just play cool. You can either make a joke out of it, like I did, or simply move on to another subject. As long as you are getting IOIs and makeout sessions, which it sounds like you are, you're doing something right.

 

[Iceberg]

Control the frame.

Any part of a conversation you don't like.. it's as easy as just changing the subject into something you DO like. Don't be phased by anything a girl says..

All you hear in your head is "I just broke up with my boyfriend so now I can get really crazy sucking your ****"

What he said.

It's information that you can use in your evaluation of the girl. But it's not something that should steer the conversation.

 

[NobodyCares1]

happened to me once too... but the situation was a bit different... she said that she broke up with her BF the day before she met me and was making out with me... but the main point is that I actually asked her about what happened and she said that he hit her and stuff... although later she admitted that she will get back with him... I didn't care at all... I had my fun and didn't want anything more form that...

 

[PDubb75]

Control the frame.

Any part of a conversation you don't like.. it's as easy as just changing the subject into something you DO like. Don't be phased by anything a girl says..

Agreed that it's easy to change the subject. I just haven't been able to tell if I should WANT to change the subject. I can see it being detrimental to the conversation, but I can also see it leading to perfect opportunities to push the convo to the next level.

I just haven't yet figured out what a girl's motive could be for bringing this up voluntarily. It isn't like I ask her to be my girlfriend and she uses a recent breakup as an excuse to say no. It can be out of the blue and slightly seems like an IOI. So, like you said, I can of course treat it that way. But I'm not sure that's actually the case.

I guess I need one of those "What girls really mean when they say..." translations here...

 

[TRSX]

When a girl says "I just recently broke up with my boyfriend"

She means: " I am insecure right now and I'm waiting for an alpha male to throw me down and help me forget all about it. "

If you are not the alpha male, guess what - you're not gettin anywhere.

 

[Bible_Belt]

A girl you approach tells you during your conversation that her and boyfriend recently broke up. How do you generally play that?...I can also see it leading to perfect opportunities to push the convo to the next level.

I would act like that was very serious news and say, "oh my goodness, you should really stay away from men right now. You're vulnerable and might make bad decisions....No, no I'm serious. You shouldn't be talking to guys."

If she agrees, then you have something to talk about. And if she disagrees, then she just told you that she wanted you to stay and talk to her.

 

[PDubb75]

A girl you approach tells you during your conversation that her and boyfriend recently broke up. How do you generally play that?...I can also see it leading to perfect opportunities to push the convo to the next level.

I would act like that was very serious news and say, "oh my goodness, you should really stay away from men right now. You're vulnerable and might make bad decisions....No, no I'm serious. You shouldn't be talking to guys."

If she agrees, then you have something to talk about. And if she disagrees, then she just told you that she wanted you to stay and talk to her.

That is perfect. Love that...

 

[troy_003]

Well,I've been through with that a couple of times and I guess every response that I make depends of either I like the girl or not,if I like the girl I tend to listen to her "melodramatic speech" regarding her ex yet I made sure to comfort her after and who knows it might lead to something else,Nevertheless if I am not so interested with the girl I just tend to ignore it and nod.

 

[Cremasta]

If she's just broken up with her bf, she's either going to be real happy, or real unhappy about it. Find out as quick as you can, or you'll be dancing around a conversation all night.

Her: "I've just broken up with my bf."

You: "So, is that a good thing or a bad thing?" or if she sounds like she's on the rebound "So, are you trying to get back at him? I'm up for that."

Let her know there's fun times ahead for a girl with the right answer...