"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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girl just walked away from me, & it stings!

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xectxny19x

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me and this girl were talking and joking around. the conversation led to dating other people, and she started talking about her past relationships. i just told her i don't do the dating scene (i just hang out) & told her i disliked scheduling or making time for anyone unless it was school or work-related. i said all this jokingly, & i don't know. the girl pretty much said "oh. i understand you're busy. goodluck." then she WALKED away. wow!

i wasn't serious about the girl and was just getting a feel for her as to whether we get along or not, but geez. at first, i thought about explaining myself to her... that i disliked scheduling, but it didn't mean i wouldn't but bit my tongue and let her walk away.

what should i do?

dang. it stings being walked away from unless she just wasn't interested and picked that as a good time to walk without making it seem like it was her fault.

input? :nervous:
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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saturos

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She's talking about her relationships and dating, sayingthat she wants to go out with you.
You say that you don't do dating, and slap her across the face.
 
C

Cashew

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rather than letting her know that you like to keep your options open... you just conveyed "I don't have an interest in potential options right now."
 
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xectxny19x

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although i told her in a light-hearted manner, what i told her was true.

- i don't date. i just hang out w/ girls 1-1 & maybe pull some here and there. nothing serious.
- i really don't like scheduling unless it's school or work-related and of course, family, but for girls... per convenience.

should i just not tell a girl these things next time? i want to see what kind of lesson i should be learning from this. appreciate the inputs! :woo:
 
M

Metaphysical

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She liked you and you pretty much said "NO" to her advances. She felt rejected, so she walked away.

Jeez, how hard is it to understand what you are saying?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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saturos

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xectxny19x said:
although i told her in a light-hearted manner, what i told her was true.

- i don't date. i just hang out w/ girls 1-1 & maybe pull some here and there. nothing serious.
- i really don't like scheduling unless it's school or work-related and of course, family, but for girls... per convenience.

should i just not tell a girl these things next time? i want to see what kind of lesson i should be learning from this. appreciate the inputs! :woo:
Click to expand...
The point isn't whether you are dating currently or not...and nor is your laziness.

What you conveyed is that you don't want to date her. So she was rejected, and walked away.
 
D

drak_ool

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she must be feeling equally as bad as you, since from what you say it sounded like you were telling her you were not available.

And what do you mean you don't scheduling when it comes to girls? You mean that every girl that you f.uck is basically a random chick that you end up charming and then hooking up with her as a result within the next few hours? I just don't quite understand how your method works...
 
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xectxny19x

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haha. thanks guys for the input. :nervous:

well, the girl straight up told me she was just looking for friends to hang out with and so was i which is why i wanted to get to know the girl more. i was thinking "this is girl seems cool. she doesn't want to be in a relationship." so when she started talking about her relationships and wanting to date, i had to tell her straight up that i don't date.

as for scheduling, yeah, i do dislike it, but it doesn't mean i don't schedule. it's just that if we do schedule something and someone was to postpone it, it would difficult to set something back up with me until about a month later.

as for girls i've scored with, actually, no, scheduling was barely involved. i'd just walk around campus, see a girl i know, and be like "let's go grab something to eat." then it goes from there. ;)

so next time, i just keep my mouth shut about my scheduling and dating habits? :cry:
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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saber

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getting her to like you before establishing your dating conditions
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We all know that the dj is supposed to stay detached to the outcome and not woried about the status of the situation and things like schedualing

but this is all mental...Its better to tell a girl you will be there for her all the time and just do whatever you want then to

tell a girl you wont be there for her when actually you are covering for the fact you would be there at the drop of a hat

...not saying thats you but those are just the opposite ends of the spectrum
 
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