I've known this great girl for a while.
She is a TRUE romantic...is into the whole "courting" process...getting to know someone...flling in love with her best friend, etc. and she is VERY LTR material. She is also a bit shy when it comes to making friends/calling people/going out.
There has always been a great sexual attraction, and we slept together a few months ago. But timing was bad, as she JUST broke up with her BF. She was going through a lot of family problems, and emotionally, she felt she wasn't ready for another relationship yet.
We kept the communication open for a month or so, and she started mentioning things like, "how we would be as a couple"; "how much time she wasted on her lousy ex BF, when i was right infront of her"; "how much she loves spending time with me", etc. I played it cool and we started getting closer and closer...but she was still holding back. She didn't call me very much...it was hard getting her out on a "date"...
Then on Monday, she reveals to me that her heart is still with her ex BF, and she is still not ready to move on. I was a bit pi$$ed off, but remained cool. She said her heart is not available to anyone right now, and wants to take some time to sort herself out.
HER - "My heart is already taken...and it's not available to anyone. I think the reason he was mean to me, was because of his illness. One of the things i didn't tell you was that on our second date, I was at the doctor's office with him and we found out together that he has a terminal illness. I had to make a decision then, whether or not to date him, and decided to."
I kept my response light and ****y...
ME - "let me guess...I'm too young for ya...too old..."
HER - "...beleive me, that's not the problem....
ME - "too sexy for ya...not good looking enough...not attracted to me?"
She gives me a look...
HER - "uuuh no...that is DEFINITELY not the problem. Ultra DJ....you are an AMAZING man...
ME - "So what's the problem?"
HER - "Do you know how many times I've though about you? How many times i tell myself that here is a Ulra DJ right infront of me who REALLY cares about me?
ME - (****y) "I can't believe you are letting ME go..."
HER - "...my heart is not available to anyone."
I think the convo ended up being 1 hour long. Then she holds me/hugs me for about 2 minutes...she pulls away and smiles.
HER - "you know...after all this...you're my best friend."
now...normally i would be worried about a comment like that, but her and I have already gone BEYOND friends, by sleeping with each other a few times, so it not like I'm in the LJBF zone...
We ended the convo pretty much there, but she told me to call her the next day...
She called me a couple of days later and left a long message on my machine, telling me about this song she wrote and how she wasnts me to write some music for it...
I don't know...
This isn't some girl I picked up in a club or on the street. This is a girl i REALLY care about. Part of me wants to keep my distance, in the hopes that NOT getting attention from me will make her realize she lost me. On the other hand, I've known her for 7 months so it's hard to do it. I;m afraid that by being as close as we have been, I;m going to keep wanting her.
How do I handle this?
She is a TRUE romantic...is into the whole "courting" process...getting to know someone...flling in love with her best friend, etc. and she is VERY LTR material. She is also a bit shy when it comes to making friends/calling people/going out.
There has always been a great sexual attraction, and we slept together a few months ago. But timing was bad, as she JUST broke up with her BF. She was going through a lot of family problems, and emotionally, she felt she wasn't ready for another relationship yet.
We kept the communication open for a month or so, and she started mentioning things like, "how we would be as a couple"; "how much time she wasted on her lousy ex BF, when i was right infront of her"; "how much she loves spending time with me", etc. I played it cool and we started getting closer and closer...but she was still holding back. She didn't call me very much...it was hard getting her out on a "date"...
Then on Monday, she reveals to me that her heart is still with her ex BF, and she is still not ready to move on. I was a bit pi$$ed off, but remained cool. She said her heart is not available to anyone right now, and wants to take some time to sort herself out.
HER - "My heart is already taken...and it's not available to anyone. I think the reason he was mean to me, was because of his illness. One of the things i didn't tell you was that on our second date, I was at the doctor's office with him and we found out together that he has a terminal illness. I had to make a decision then, whether or not to date him, and decided to."
I kept my response light and ****y...
ME - "let me guess...I'm too young for ya...too old..."
HER - "...beleive me, that's not the problem....
ME - "too sexy for ya...not good looking enough...not attracted to me?"
She gives me a look...
HER - "uuuh no...that is DEFINITELY not the problem. Ultra DJ....you are an AMAZING man...
ME - "So what's the problem?"
HER - "Do you know how many times I've though about you? How many times i tell myself that here is a Ulra DJ right infront of me who REALLY cares about me?
ME - (****y) "I can't believe you are letting ME go..."
HER - "...my heart is not available to anyone."
I think the convo ended up being 1 hour long. Then she holds me/hugs me for about 2 minutes...she pulls away and smiles.
HER - "you know...after all this...you're my best friend."
now...normally i would be worried about a comment like that, but her and I have already gone BEYOND friends, by sleeping with each other a few times, so it not like I'm in the LJBF zone...
We ended the convo pretty much there, but she told me to call her the next day...
She called me a couple of days later and left a long message on my machine, telling me about this song she wrote and how she wasnts me to write some music for it...
I don't know...
This isn't some girl I picked up in a club or on the street. This is a girl i REALLY care about. Part of me wants to keep my distance, in the hopes that NOT getting attention from me will make her realize she lost me. On the other hand, I've known her for 7 months so it's hard to do it. I;m afraid that by being as close as we have been, I;m going to keep wanting her.
How do I handle this?
