Girl is scared/afraid to have sex?

[seacabosin]

Hey all!

I've been lurking for a while but I figured I better start posting!

So basically I have been seeing this girl for over a month and she is moving soon. We really like eachother, etc. but we haven't had sex. I know she wants it but she is fighting herself over it. Basically she said she is scared to have sex with me unless she is in a relationship with me. And she is NOT a virgin so thats not the issue.

She is moving in a week and I really want her before she goes and I know I can do it but I feel I am missing something? She thinks that once she moves I'll never talk to her again, which is not true.


We are both mid-twenties. Any suggestions?

Thanks!

 

[trv26]

She's not afraid. It's just that she doesn't find you attractive (physically) enough to jump into bed with you immediately. I'll wager a bet that this is a problem you usually have with women you are dating.

That's not to say she doesn't "love" you. She probably does, about which you should know better. If thats the case you should be able to have sex eventually with her although Im not sure about how long the wait is going to be.

Solution?
1. Make an effort to look better. But remember your attractiveness is always going to be limited by your genetics.
2. Get her in the mood somehow.
That's all I can think of.

Don't take anything I said personally. I'm in the same damn situation .

 

[Warrior74]

She wants you to stop talking about it and do it. Either go for it or leave her the hell alone. You are teetering on the friendzone if you haven't already fell into it. You may have already. Go to close the deal the next time you hang out, dress fresh, smell good, have your crib clean and your sex mixtapes ready and go for it. All she can do is say no, who cares, she's leaving anyway.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

She may not wanna have sex just before she leaves. Never seeing you again. Sex can really create strong feelings for someone.

 

[seacabosin]

I.A.F.Y.B. and Warrior74 are right.

a. she is leaving and is scared to get attached to me, and she thinks sex will make her more attached
b. she wants me to just do it, even though she is scared to. basically I am the one that has been keeping it from happening. it's true. she has even asked me why i haven't done it with her yet. ironically!

c. she definitely finds me attractive ;-)

Thanks guys!