ok so ive been seeing this girl on and off for about 3 months now. The other day she tells me that shes going to make me wait for sex until she knows that I really want her. WTF is up with that? Im seeing 2 other girls right now, one of which ive had sex with and girl #1 knows it, and the other girl is just kind of a toy. Anyway when she brought this up, I didnt say much, i just played it off like she was making a joke. What can I do to turn the tables back around and make it like Im in control of when we "get to have sex". I dont want her thinking shes in control of my emotions and when I "want her enough" for us to finally have sex. Any ideas?
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girl im dating tells me shes making me wait for sex???
- Thread starter jamescr73
- Start date
strong like bull
Senior Don Juan
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tell her, you dont waste yourself on girls who play immature games and that when shes ready to put the bull**** aside, give you a call.
or, get really intimate, make out and do some heavy petting to really turn her on. let her think shes about to stop you again.. then all of the sudden, stand up, say youre going to make her wait for sex until you know that she really wants you, and leave the room. literally, drive home or go somewhere else. leave her by herself.
thatll stun her like a cattle prod.
regardless, in the mean time, hook up with those other girls and **** their brains out.
or, get really intimate, make out and do some heavy petting to really turn her on. let her think shes about to stop you again.. then all of the sudden, stand up, say youre going to make her wait for sex until you know that she really wants you, and leave the room. literally, drive home or go somewhere else. leave her by herself.
thatll stun her like a cattle prod.
regardless, in the mean time, hook up with those other girls and **** their brains out.
In a way, she may want you to let her know that you want to be with her for a human being, and not just a piece of meat. If thats the case, you may want to show her you care about her beyond her physical looks and actually enjoy being with her for who she is. If that is not enough, and your needs are not fulfilled, you have the choice of getting out (NEXT) or sticking with it and seeing what comes of it. Some would say the DJ way is walking away or nexting her, but ultimately its your call. Do what feels in your best interest.
She's made you wait 3 months already... uh, I'd say that's plenty f*cking long enough. How old is this girl? She sounds like she's still in high school.
If I were you, I wouldn't push for sex, that'll only make her less likely to give it to you. I've been in this position many times-- women seem to always see me as the "long term" type and they feel they should "build" something first before coital relations. Only difference is I've never had to wait longer than 4-8 weeks. You've waited enough. Give her another week while making it perfectly obvious you want some tang without actually verbalising your desires. If she still doesn't give it up, just stop calling her or seeing her. You always have two other girls if she fails to see the big picture. You win either way.
If I were you, I wouldn't push for sex, that'll only make her less likely to give it to you. I've been in this position many times-- women seem to always see me as the "long term" type and they feel they should "build" something first before coital relations. Only difference is I've never had to wait longer than 4-8 weeks. You've waited enough. Give her another week while making it perfectly obvious you want some tang without actually verbalising your desires. If she still doesn't give it up, just stop calling her or seeing her. You always have two other girls if she fails to see the big picture. You win either way.
I like this idea in theory. But I also suspect that she could easily see through your game and resent you for it. I think if you change up your script a bit it may work better... like this:
(in the middle of petting, right before sex) "I've been thinking about what you said, and I feel you may be right. I'd rather wait for sex too until I know you really want me... blah, blah, blah, ad nauseum..."
tracy Jaks
Don Juan
your no dj your a jerk, how do you expect to **** this girl if she knows your ****ing other girls.
Pepe Le Pew
Don Juan
Listen to Charm.......
Shes 21. And she hasnt really made me wait 3 months, its been off and on, there was actually a 1 month period where I never talked to her because of some drunken **** she pulled at a club one night. Thanks for all the advice, and I think what Charm said has alot of pull in this situation. I used to date one of her friends (thats where I originally met her) but they arent friends anymore. She constantly reinforces to me "im not Rebecca" cause she was a h0e. The next time we start making out though, I think im going to try what drZaius said. Thanks for the ideas.
Anything else?
I have to say that what Charm is suggesting is, in a way, the same old AFC, Cosmo, Oprah Winfrey bullsh1t. You are pursuing a relationship with this girl to have SEX. I'm sorry, but SEX is a MAJOR part of any relationship with a woman. Believe me, you have given this girl more than enough time to show her that you care for her as a person, not out for just sex, blah blah f*cking blah. From what I can see, this girl has already been trouble for you-- maybe she's just trouble, period. You may want to think about calling up one of your relievers a little earlier than you want to.
tracy Jaks
Don Juan
A girls making you wait for sex, so what who cares that what they do.
So your dj skills didnt get her into bed in the first 3 months, wait another, or is that all you want sex?
Shes testing you, you say youve been wth other girls and she knows, well then why should she give her boy to somebody who isnt going to respect her?
So your dj skills didnt get her into bed in the first 3 months, wait another, or is that all you want sex?
Shes testing you, you say youve been wth other girls and she knows, well then why should she give her boy to somebody who isnt going to respect her?
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
This is too simple!
She simply doesn't want to be just another notch in your belt.
Either cut the extracurricular activities, or don't expect sex from her. She wants to be the only one in the game before she does it.
She simply doesn't want to be just another notch in your belt.
Either cut the extracurricular activities, or don't expect sex from her. She wants to be the only one in the game before she does it.
Umbra
Master Don Juan
If I wanted to speed things up, I'd behave along the lines suggested by "strong like bull," but not as harshly.
I would simply become more cold and distant, and when she noticed and asked what's wrong, I'd act emotionally injured. I'd simply say "I just don't like it when people play games with me" and then she'll ask what I mean. Then I'd say, "Well, I'm just straight-forward with people. If I like someone, I just do. I don't make people wait for things and test them and play games. It just upsets me." That will play on her guilt, but if you don't play that card perfectly, it will backfire. The next suggestion is better.
Don't throw in the immature "I'm going to make you wait for sex, too" part. But I think you should turn the game around. Every time the two of you make out, turn up the heat and be really good, and then stop things abruptly and say "It's getting late" or "I have to get up early tomorrow." Turn it around.
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JustDoItAlways
Master Don Juan
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What women say versus what they mean
This is almost always a really good sign.
It means that she is thinking about having sex with you, that she's ready to take the leap. She, in fact, said she would.
Women usually don't literally mean what they say. There is always another layer underneath. Its called ******** and men don't understand it because we usually mean what we say.
Whenever a woman says to me "there will be no sex tonight", or "I want to wait to have sex" or "I'm not looking for a boyfriend", I think damn, I'm going to get lucky very soon and I'm usually right.
James, what she really said was "keep playing your cards right tiger, and we'll be bumping uglies in no time."
This is almost always a really good sign.
It means that she is thinking about having sex with you, that she's ready to take the leap. She, in fact, said she would.
Women usually don't literally mean what they say. There is always another layer underneath. Its called ******** and men don't understand it because we usually mean what we say.
Whenever a woman says to me "there will be no sex tonight", or "I want to wait to have sex" or "I'm not looking for a boyfriend", I think damn, I'm going to get lucky very soon and I'm usually right.
James, what she really said was "keep playing your cards right tiger, and we'll be bumping uglies in no time."
Umbra
Master Don Juan
JustDoItAlways is absolutely right. I forgot to mention that it was a good sign that she "wants to make you wait." That's a sure sign it's coming. In fact, I'm going to say that's it probably better that you don't try to speed things up. If you just show a little patience, she'll jump on you. She just wants to feel like she's in control.
Yeah, like when mommy used to say "Be on your best behavior and you will get one cookie before dinner when we get home." Oh Boy! A treat! If I'm a good little boy I'll get a special surprise! YAY! 
I'm disappointed in these responses. Grow the f*ck up. Sure, this kind of arrangement is great when you're four years old, but we're adults now. I can go to the store and get my own damn cookie. James, don't let her pull your f*cking strings like you're a little b1tch puppet waiting patiently for his prize. It has already been well-established-- you have other girls who are perfectly willing to have sex with you. Stop wasting your time with a control freak.
I'm disappointed in these responses. Grow the f*ck up. Sure, this kind of arrangement is great when you're four years old, but we're adults now. I can go to the store and get my own damn cookie. James, don't let her pull your f*cking strings like you're a little b1tch puppet waiting patiently for his prize. It has already been well-established-- you have other girls who are perfectly willing to have sex with you. Stop wasting your time with a control freak.
JustDoItAlways
Master Don Juan
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That was just the point of my post dr,
He doesn't have to wait, he doesn't have to let her pull his fvcking strings.
She is ready now.
He just has to make his move, maybe wait till the second time, and its done.
Too many guys miss this signal and take her literally.
He doesn't have to wait, he doesn't have to let her pull his fvcking strings.
She is ready now.
He just has to make his move, maybe wait till the second time, and its done.
Too many guys miss this signal and take her literally.
ok i realized what date it is, and ive only been seeing her since march 20th or there abouts. Then there was the 1 month abscence after the club incident. So I would say weve only been "seeing" each other for about a month total. The other day she said something about not knowing how she feels about me, and she doesnt really know where I stand in her life. Shes not seeing anyone else, and hasnt since we met back in january (remember I dated her ex-friend first up until late march). One more thing, her ex-friend called me the other day and asked me to go and get a beer with her. I denied her cause I was busy, and I really dont want anything else to do with her. So I told the girl of discussion that her friend called me and she got so pissed. She was like "I bet she wants to start dating you again," and she got really jealous and fast. She then said she was going to call her up and tell her that we had sex and it was really good. (I never had sex with her friend but we got really close to it one night). So I know shes been thinking about having sex with me. What can I do the next time she invites me to her house (happens about once every 2-3 weeks) to seal the deal? Sometimes she seems really distant at first and doesnt want to get physical. She would just rather sit on the couch and watch a movie and talk. But we always end up "sleeping" together with the making out and heavy petting just before. Any ideas???
( . )( . )
Banned
most of these replys are sickening, my god what a bunch of pvssies, i even saw some guy say "sex is that all you want" and another saying it isnt that big of a deal... LOL.
wake up out of your brainwashed femanised stupor.
YES YES YES sex is VERY important to a young man, its SO important that if i was allen your accounts would be banned for implying that this guy should be feeling the tiniest bit guilty for having a primal urge, shame on you.
STOP giving out this bullsh!t advice.
and this guy what the....
is he married?(not that marriage means anything to most couples now anyway) is he a monk? a priest? .
this attitude is bloody appalling, with this type of thinking no wonder men are so rare.
James if she has some warped, game playing hoops she wants you to jump through, throw that chick out like yesterdays banana peel.
and go find a women whos not afraid to be an actual WOMEN
wake up out of your brainwashed femanised stupor.
YES YES YES sex is VERY important to a young man, its SO important that if i was allen your accounts would be banned for implying that this guy should be feeling the tiniest bit guilty for having a primal urge, shame on you.
STOP giving out this bullsh!t advice.
and this guy what the....
what gives you the right huh? so what if hes seeing other girls?
is he married?(not that marriage means anything to most couples now anyway) is he a monk? a priest? .
this attitude is bloody appalling, with this type of thinking no wonder men are so rare.
James if she has some warped, game playing hoops she wants you to jump through, throw that chick out like yesterdays banana peel.
and go find a women whos not afraid to be an actual WOMEN
