Girl I am dating (more exclusively) is starting to become overly sensitive with my jokes. Thoughts?

[spiegel549]

Been dating this 23 year old chick for 3 months and we just recently became "exclusive" with each other. I am noticing more recently that my jokes that I say, and have been saying for years she gets offended by. Like out of the blue. She doesn't make a big scene because I squash it by putting her in check such as "It was a joke, don't be so sensitive, get over it." followed by a laugh.

Example A: I made a joke about Charlie Sheen having aids and that I wouldn't want to share a beer with him. She got slightly offended because she use to help homeless people with aids, going on about how you can't contract it by sharing a beer etc.

Example B: Her best friend got hit by a car on her bicycle. My first response was is she ok? She is ok good, she needs to sue! I can tell by her tone of voice that she was somehow offended by my thought of suing someone who hit her with there car.

Example C: Homeless guy on street with no shoes. She wanted me to give him my shoes and she would go buy me new ones. We were literally on our way to dinner. I said absolutely not, he is just going to get my shoes dirty. She didn't like that joke haha.

Just for the record she does A LOT of great things for me such as cook, clean, almost zero complaints about what we go and do, always down for whatever and good sex. But...

I have dated a lot of women, almost all get my jokes and know that they are jokes. This girl I am dating now does A LOT of volunteer work and seems more recently showing this sensitive/offended side. I need to just make sure, and answer honestly.

What am I getting myself into here? Should I ease up a bit on my over the top jokes? Thoughts?

 

[Yewki]

I don't understand what the problem is. All your examples are minor disagreements over totally mundane and inconsequental things. How is this a problem?

These are not really jokes either, not sure why you call them that.

 

[Caravaggio]

She's a bleeding heart and overlooked your cynicism until she felt in a power position, (aka exclusive,) to address it.

I'd ignore it. If you change something as fundamental to your core as speakinging your mind, she'll lose respect for you.

Think of it a an easy way to maintain the "hes such an *******" gripe that keeps them coming back.

 

[El Payaso]

That's how it starts. The over sensitiveness. Finding a fault in everything you do. The feeling of walking on tip toes around her. That turns good relationships...bad.

 

[ohrein]

They don't really sound like jokes to be honest. Not that she should be getting all uppity about it anyway but seems like you could do with reading up on humor.

Q: How much coke did Charlie Sheen take last January? A: Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

That's a joke.

Anyway, I've had these sort of issues crop up as I like to push boundaries in conversations or I get bored. Women are incredibly insecure so you can't be just offensive. You have to be funny and offensive. If you lack the humor element you are just an ******* and that will start to drag you down in an LTR. Works on some chicks you are just casual with but yeah.

If she's not laughing, you're doing it wrong.

 

[bigneil]

She's mad that you won't do other people favors? And she would have a "Feel the Bern" bumper sticker, but she can't afford a car?

Dump that whiny liberal.

Men, these little warning signs need to be taken extremely seriously. They are a sign of falling attraction. When a woman is sufficiently attracted she'll be too busy singing your praises to find fault like this.

It usually starts small, with their trying to adjust your tie or something. This is the modern woman. Never satisfied. Expecting Tom Selleck circa 1980 or somehow feeling let down.

 

[SadoMasochrist]

You're forgetting to monitor what she does, not what she says.

Just for the record she does A LOT of great things for me such as cook, clean, almost zero complaints about what we go and do, always down for whatever and good sex. But...

Continue on until something changes.

 

[wifehunter]

That's how it starts. The over sensitiveness. Finding a fault in everything you do. The feeling of walking on tip toes around her. That turns good relationships...bad.

yes, been there!!! It's Satan's NASTY way of destroying relationships!!! To expect perfection, is unrealistic... only God is perfect.

Judge not, lest ye be judged.... aka finger pointing.

Moving forward, I would start with saying less: http://48laws-of-power.blogspot.ae/2011/05/law-4-always-say-less-than-necessary.html

 

[spiegel549]

Thanks for all the responses guys! After taking some time to evaluate myself and reflect on these comments I realized something major. I talk entirely to much. I NEED to learn to be more selective and what I say and when I say it. Especially when it comes to women. I agree with certain jokes are perhaps not necessary and come off more of being an azzhole then being funny.

With that said even with my texting I am realizing less is more. My chick tells me her friend got hit by a car. I asked if she was okay. She said she was fine. THAT is where I should of left it alone, but no I decided to go into suing and lawsuits. Honestly who gives a crap about her friend? lol.

I think moving forward unless it affects me DIRECTLY why care? Thoughts?

 

[Yewki]

I think moving forward unless it affects me DIRECTLY why care? Thoughts?

Too extreme.

But as you said, talking less might help. This is basically a side effect of just caring less about the little things. The fact you posted a thread about mundane disagreements shows you definitely care too much. Not sure what the best way is to do this is, other than just learn and gain experience.

 

[bigneil]

Once upon a time, when women had been with 5 or fewer men, they would get attached if you had sex with them, and they would literally love you unconditionally, for at least a month.

Sigh... the good old days.

Now she's too busy complaining that you're not as rich as the richest guy she ever dated (who is 70), not as hot as the hottest guy she ever dated (who is one year younger than her and lives in his mother's basement but has great parties [despite the mildew smell]), and not as good in bed as the best lover she ever dated (who is gay, and female).

 

[ubercat]

I agree say less and combine that with a little push pull. To be honest I think this is a classic mistake you're trying to be your woman s entertainment. She's meant to be yours. R u spending a lot of time together?

 

[spiegel549]

Another thing is we are spending a lot of time together and I have cut that back a bit which has helped. Still seeing other plates but it is becoming more difficult mentally because I feel like I am going to be seen out somewhere. Especially because I am all about flirting and Kino.

I am legit working later into the night and coming home late and passing right out. So I am able to cut down how often she comes over to 2-3 times a week including weekends. She would come over every single night if she could but I do not allow it.

The latest is I went out to eat breakfast and as we sat outside a fly landed on my food. I killed it. She followed up immediately with "Why did you have to kill it..we were in his domain." I come from the east coast raised on hunting fishing shooting etc. I literally just looked at her and continued eating my meal.

Not to start a debate here but I am noticing she is all about the things I disagree with. I have nothing against gays but seeing two guys make out at the bar grosses me out. She got upset that there is nothing wrong with it etc.

You get where I am going here? Should I pull the plug on this or just enjoy the sex and keep spinning side plates?

Edit: She is 22. I am 30. Also probably the problem.