"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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girl hasnt called when she said she would

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nd123

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Took her out this past Saturday (now 5 days ago). We had a few drinks beforehand at the bar at an adult go-kart place - a very fun date. I was all over her, arm over her back, fingers running across her back and her arms, moving her bangs when they fell, touching her chin… she was completely comfortable. Conversation was very flirty. At the end of the night she invited me to her condo's holiday party that is tomorrow (Friday) and said that she would talk to me sometime this week…

I have not made contact in any way since the date. Her finals week is right now and ends tomorrow (the day of the holiday party)... Since I haven't heard from her I have made back up plans with others - I'm not going to put my life on hold for her.

If she doesn't call by tomorrow afternoon I was thinking of sending her a "Congratulations!" text message. As she will be done with her last final ever (she's graduating college)... Harmless?

I have not called her often except to talk for a few minutes and set up dates with her and even with those calls I spaced them out to be about once a week at the most.

I have posted asking for feedback on another issue with this girl. Some of the post may be relevant: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=90942

I'm very interested in hearing your suggestions... thanks.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Docs

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If she's leaving...dont' look too far in her direction. The best you can probably pull is a ONS. Go nuts, I'll let others advise.
 
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Shiftkey

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Sounds to me like you have everything covered and you're handling the situation just fine.
 
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DonMEgaHoss

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I say go to the party and dont worry about the phone call. She aint your mommie. She invited you to the party go if you want but have the back-ups in case the situation goes bad at the party. If you want to send a message say that you'll be there at the party whenever it is or give her like a 20min warning.

You got it on lock, man. Just show up. Mingle alittle. If you dont think is going well bail or go for another chick at the party.
 
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nd123

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Docs - She's staying in town for work for quite some time. So I'm shooting for more than a ONS with her.

I'm going to take DonMEgaHoss's advice and text her that "I'll be there at 7... should I come upstairs first or meet you in the lobby?" something along those lines...

Thanks for the quick response!
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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wheelin&dealin

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You haven't called her in 5 days since the date? Why are you waiting so long? Call her now and talk for a bit, see how she's doing and set something up. Don't let the situation get weird.
 
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nd123

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Wheelin - She said she'd call me but asked me to come to her condo's holiday party...

I've been following the advice on the forums about not calling too much, calling to chat for a bit but in the end set up a date... so far so good... Trying not to appear needy, etc...
 
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wheelin&dealin

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Originally posted by nd123
Wheelin - She said she'd call me but asked me to come to her condo's holiday party...

I've been following the advice on the forums about not calling too much, calling to chat for a bit but in the end set up a date... so far so good... Trying not to appear needy, etc...
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What women say and what women do are 2 different things. If she said she'll call you back, pretend like she never even said that. Call her up when you think is a reasonable time frame and get things going. Some women are idiots with the phone and sometimes it takes a guy to step up and get the ball rolling. Although the advice on this forum is a good starting point, that wait a week or more bullsh*t with phone calls is a bit ridiculous.
 
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DonMEgaHoss

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You already set something up by via the party thing... Just give alittle prewarning text or message thats is if you want or just show up.
 
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nd123

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i just called her and got her voicemail... i left her one along the lines of: "hey new alumna, just calling to say hey and congratulations... i'll be at your place around 630/645, call me back when you get a chance"

i'll show up then, hopefully this continues to go as smoothly as it has been goin...

thanks for lending ur ears
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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nd123

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she just called me back... said that her mother and her mother's friend are going to be stopping by tonight to see the new condo but doesnt know what time yet... said she is probably not going to the party bc of this but said that we'll be going out elsewhere to get smashed later tonight...

guess that wraps this up... thanks again
 
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