"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
girl calls at the last minute and wants to meet at a bar, what does a dj do?
- Thread starter 007mja
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
wheelin&dealin
Master Don Juan
Tell her to come over and you'll rent a movie.007mja said:
Movie = guaranteed make-out session & possibly more
THE_ADDMAN
Master Don Juan
nothing, you missed the call cuz of your busy life
right?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
thederekeffect1
Master Don Juan
Let me ask you guys a question, at what point do you say YES to going out on a date. Or do you always sit around and make excuses not to for the sake of "looking busy" and "being don juan" and "making her eagerly await the next time she see's you".
Haha, screw that bull****. If you want to go out and have some fun tonight with a beautiful woman... By all means, do it. If you don't want to, don't. It's that simple. Don't make up some phony excuse not to if you really want to just so you can be "Don Juan". You're only playing yourself if you do that.
thederekeffect1 said:
I'll have to agree with this guy a bit more than the other chaps, notwithout giving due credit to each response.
An underlying message I'm getting here that goes deeper than the question you're asking though, IMO, is: HOW DO I KEEP THIS GIRL IMPRESSED?
Bottom line, if you're asking guys about how to respond to a girl's request, what you're actually saying, in reality, is: I haven't yet trusted MY own instincts.
This is what Derek was hitting upon. What do YOU want to do? It goes further than a mere question to go out on a date at the last minute. That in itself is just a drop in the bucket. But sooner or later, you'll come to find out, that the question you just asked is parallel to questions like:
-What do I do if she looks like she wants to kiss me?
-What if she asks me to come over to her house?
-What if she asks me if I have a girlfriend?
-What if we hold hands and her hand goes limp?
-What if the conversation hits that awkward silent moment?
WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN, WHY....
STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You're missing the point if you go for the step-by-step, Q and A approach.
Ultimately, the main factor to getting the right answer? Is... YOU.
For now on, when it comes to what YOU think a woman is going to think about you... STOP. And ask yourself this: What do YOU want???
Man up.
BuckwildNYC
Senior Don Juan
thederekeffect1 said:
Man o man....................if only it was that easy my friend. Unfortunately you can never let your guard down and just DO WHAT YOU WANT. You always have to be playing the game if you want to be successful with women. It sucks big time but its true. I'm living it right now, here's my quick story.........
On St. Patrick's Day my long time friend from high school, who is a girl, invited me out. She's been hooking me up with girls for the last 10 years and she said there was this cute single girl from her job coming out and she wanted me to meet her. Fine, so I meet the girl and we really hit it off. We danced and talked all night. The night ended and I took her number.
It just so happened that my Birthday was the next day too. I was having a party in a club with about 20 people but I didn't have any female prospects coming. I wanted to maybe find me a new one that night. But, then I figured I met this great girl the night before, who I thought was pretty much a sure thing, so why not invite her out. I figured she was a friend of a friend so maybe I could let my guard down a little. Big mistake. NEVER break the 2 or three day rule for calling girls.
So I call her the next day and I get her voicemail. I leave a message saying what club I was having my party and if she wanted to come to just call me. She never returned my call. 3 days went by and nothing. So I call her again and leave a message saying to call me back. 2 more days and nothing. Obviously she's thinking I'm some desperate fukk who didn't have a date for his birthday so he was inviting out some chick he JUST met to fill in.
So, I leave her a text message and word for word this is what I wrote..... "why did you give me your phone number if you didn't want to talk to me. Jessica said you were such a sweet girl. What happened?" She calls me back literally 4 minutes later. She says how sorry she is but shes been very busy with work blah blah blah. Please............she was just trying to weed out desperate lonely guy. She probably thinks I'm gonna turn into one of those clingy annoying men. Bottom line is it's been taking me 2 weeks to try to wash away that desperation aura thats hanging over my head. All because I WANTED this supposedly sweet girl to come out and I forgot to play THE GAME...................don't let it happen to you.
Be strong. Even if you want to go on that date, if it's gonna make you look desperate or needy don't go. Better off turning her down and let her think about you for a couple days than to accept her date and look like you don't have a life.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.