Girl calls at night

[Tortendieb]

Hey I've just gotten a call from this girl (it's 10pm here on a Friday night). Basically we've had a quick lunch break "date" couple of days ago, and i know she's into me, we have this crazy chemistry going, really she looks quite normal but I get a raging boner just talking to her. I hope she feels similar(though hope she has no boner)

So I'm completely not expecting any calls (here in NZ everyone texts and noone calls), so it was a quite awkward convo! Of course it's her fault and I guess it's a good sign that she wants to call me!
But I wonder if I could have "played it smooth" instead of acting completely dumbfounded.

Convo was about this:
Me: Hey (name)! how are you?
Her: Hiiii how's it going
Me: Er good thanks how bout you
Her: Was just hanging out with my friends now going home
Me: Ah ok (pause... she's expecting me to say something even though she called!)
Her: Soo what you been up to?

I tell her some random stuff what I'm doing tomorrow, just because I'm not a prick, but she's not bringing up any topics so it's awkward goodbye.

QUESTION:
1) Was she somehow indicating she's free and would like to come over!? If yes I would be angry to not have taken the hint! But I don't think so because nothing much happened between us yet - and if she wanted to say that she could have made it more clear
2) How should I handle an unexpected phonecall like this, where she doesn't know what to say!? And me neither of course! I mean she's calling, she should at least hold the convo.

Anyway I think she genuinely likes me but was just really nervous. I know, phonecalls can be tough. So some minutes later I text her to come swimming with me next evening, which she readily accepts...

 

[Tortendieb]

Oh and another thing that happened recently:
This other girl who is pretty slutty but at the same time trying to give me a hard time (asking me out, late night makeout, then getting picked up by her mum) texts me at 3AM "What's up tonight sexy?"

I mean, hot damn if this was a booty call but hell it's 3 and I'm in bed sleeping and she lives pretty far away! I didn't have a car and was sure she wouldn't drive all the way. So I went back to sleep and replied in the morning exactly what I thought: "Was that a booty call? hot damn!"

But seriously, if that was a booty call... how would you have gone about it?

 

[Igetit!]

Hey I've just gotten a call from this girl (it's 10pm here on a Friday night). Basically we've had a quick lunch break "date" couple of days ago, and i know she's into me, we have this crazy chemistry going, really she looks quite normal but I get a raging boner just talking to her. I hope she feels similar(though hope she has no boner)

So I'm completely not expecting any calls (here in NZ everyone texts and noone calls), so it was a quite awkward convo! Of course it's her fault and I guess it's a good sign that she wants to call me!
But I wonder if I could have "played it smooth" instead of acting completely dumbfounded.

Convo was about this:
Me: Hey (name)! how are you?
Her: Hiiii how's it going
Me: Er good thanks how bout you
Her: Was just hanging out with my friends now going home
Me: Ah ok (pause... she's expecting me to say something even though she called!)
Her: Soo what you been up to?

Lol dude....this happens a LOT. A lot,a lot,a lot,a lot.


I've had this happen to me many,many times.


She's looking for you to take the lead. You're using logic here. You think,"Well hey,she called me,so she should be the one doing all the talking".


Nope,doesn't work that way. If she had called for a specific reason,she would have gotten to the point right after saying hi. Right after she said she had been hanging out with her friends and was on the way home,when she stopped talking,that was a cue for you to take the lead.


You said that you two have "crazy chemistry" between you two. That's why she didn't text. That's why she called you and expected you to take the lead in speaking to her. She wanted to feel the chemistry you two have. She was expecting you to stir up her feelings and the passion you two have.


Instead,you (yes,YOU) allowed the convo to get awkward.


You should have flirted with her. Teased her a little bit. Told her you were just thinking about how she looked in whatever she was wearing on the lunch date you two had a few days ago. Told her you already had a plan in mind for the next date you take her on,but not tell her what it is.


Instead of saying these things and getting her imagination and emotions running wild,you gave her a rundown of errands you had to do the next day.


Somehow,I don't think your to-do list was what she had planned to hear when calling you,lol.

QUESTION:
1) Was she somehow indicating she's free and would like to come over!? If yes I would be angry to not have taken the hint! But I don't think so because nothing much happened between us yet

I don't think so man. If the only time you two have been out together was just a few days ago for a "quick lunch date",I think her wanting to come over to your house late at night may be jumping the gun a bit.


I think she just wanted to feel the attraction/chemistry you two have. And since that can't be done through texting,she called you instead.

2) How should I handle an unexpected phonecall like this, where she doesn't know what to say!?

FLIRT
TEASE
PLAY
JOKE
USE SEXUAL INNUENDO
TELL HER SOMETHING FUNNY,EXCITING,OR INTERESTING THAT HAPPENED TO YOU THAT DAY


Do SOMETHING.....but try to avoid awkwardness at ALL COST.


If she feels awkward speaking to you on the phone,she may think that's how things will be on A DATE,and thus,she may want to avoid a date to avoid the awkwardness.

And me neither of course! I mean she's calling, she should at least hold the convo.

Stop thinking like this.

If she had had something SPECIFIC to talk about,again,she would have brought it up immediately after saying hello. If that happens again,take the lead.

Anyway I think she genuinely likes me but was just really nervous. I know, phonecalls can be tough.

True,but you still need to take charge.

Women are EMOTIONAL. If she feels awkward around you,for WHATEVER REASON,she'll link that feeling of awkwardness TO YOU.


And your little "Well she called me,so she should be the one to hold the conversation" reasoning won't do jack squat because emotions AREN'T SUBJECT TO REASON.



In other words,if she feels awkward,then you say to her,"Well you called me,so you should keep the conversation going",that won't make the awkwardness go away. It'll just make you look like a fool.



So next time be prepared.

 

[Tortendieb]

I appreciate your advice but I was just really surprised at the moment, duh. I was concentrating on something real hard, so I was practially in anti-flirt mood. Ever had the situation where you try to come up with something flirty but can't think of anything? I'm practically unapproachable in some moments.

Anyway it didn't go down as bad as you put it but thanks for advice. I'll make better use of this opportunity next time.

 

[vatoloco]

But seriously, if that was a booty call... how would you have gone about it?

Her: "What's up tonight sexy?"
You: "Me, when you come over. Jump on it."

 

[PDubb75]

I was concentrating on something real hard, so I was practially in anti-flirt mood. Ever had the situation where you try to come up with something flirty but can't think of anything? I'm practically unapproachable in some moments.

I don't think that's even possible for me. I don't think I have an anti-flirt mode. Even when my safety is at stake. If I disappear randomly from here, it's pretty safe to assume my flirting has something to do with it.

At least you will know for next time. And always be ready and on your game. Especially when you decide to pick up a call from someone you are interested in. This can be hard enough when you play everything right. Don't put yourself in a hole.

 

[runner83]

Personally, for a girl you haven't banged yet, I wouldn't have even answered a call from her on a Friday night unless you were in the right mood.

It was a simply a test to see what you were up to.

Better to ignore the call and let her wonder what you're up to on a Friday night, than to answer if you're not in the mood.

 

[cablecow15]

Her: "What's up tonight sexy?"
You: "Me, when you come over. Jump on it."

lmfao this is gold

 

[backbreaker]

assume the sale.always be aggressive.

girl calls you that late, the entire conversation should revolve around you getting her over her house. you are reacting, instead of acting. who cares what she wants. you want to ****. when a woman calls me at 10pm, i assume it's safe for me to proceed.

 

[Huffman]

edit: wrong thread

 

[Tortendieb]

I don't think that's even possible for me. I don't think I have an anti-flirt mode. Even when my safety is at stake. If I disappear randomly from here, it's pretty safe to assume my flirting has something to do with it.

Really? I have gigantic mood swings. I realize my post sounds pretty sad but when I'm feeling good everything comes to me so easy, flirt kino boom boom boom... but at other times not at all, for example if i'm at work and not motivated. I tend to be inside my head so much that noone better come near me

Okay anyway thanks, I should have decided: either work up the mood quickly, or not answer.

 

[Falcon25]

Runner is correct. Don't answer these. Next time be like "Hey, just got home, was on a date, want to come over or what?" This girl is testing you. If you had sex with her already, my analysis would be different.