"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Girl called me mysterious

teddy

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I assume it's because she liked it.

My question is......do I continue to play up the mystery angle or what?

I've always lived by the axiom short and sweet. I don't give anyone too much of my time, but when I do, I make sure they have fun. End on a high note.

I never want to overstay my welcome, so to speak. But maybe I have to to get anywhere.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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zekko

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teddy said:
I never want to overstay my welcome, so to speak. But maybe I have to to get anywhere.
I notice that most of the guys who advocate the mystery angle don't seem to ever achieve intimacy in a long term manner with women. Not that there's anything wrong with that, as long as you are just interested in the short term. It just depends on what you want.

Mystery can help attract a girl in the early stages, and get her thinking about you. And that's great for one night stands, FWBs, and the like, if that is your goal. But if you want to keep a girl in the long term, then she actually has to be attracted to the real you. So you can't just be evasive with her and unavailable forever. At some point the act will get old and she'll be distracted by some other shiny object.
 

teddy

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zekko said:
I notice that most of the guys who advocate the mystery angle don't seem to ever achieve intimacy in a long term manner with women. Not that there's anything wrong with that, as long as you are just interested in the short term. It just depends on what you want.

Mystery can help attract a girl in the early stages, and get her thinking about you. And that's great for one night stands, FWBs, and the like, if that is your goal. But if you want to keep a girl in the long term, then she actually has to be attracted to the real you. So you can't just be evasive with her and unavailable forever. At some point the act will get old and she'll be distracted by some other shiny object.
I understand you, but this is more of a "next step form here" question. Long-term, I obviously have to open up a bit. But for short, short term, is it better to play up that angle?
 

zekko

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teddy said:
I understand you, but this is more of a "next step form here" question. Long-term, I obviously have to open up a bit. But for short, short term, is it better to play up that angle?
I'm not a big fan of the "mystery" angle, myself, although others swear by it. I prefer to have women like me for who I am.

Now, if what you're doing is working, and it's attracting her, I imagine most people would tell you to keep doing it. And that's okay, but the question arises is it really working? If you haven't gotten anywhere with what you've been doing, as you say, I'd say the next step is to spend some time with her and escalate. If she rejects you from there, at least you know where you stand. But it sounds like you've already built some attraction, so I would say it is time to move things along, toward whatever it is you want to do with her. Have you been out with her yet? If not, I'd say invite her.
 

Don-Kong

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Mysterious means 2 things - Weird or interesting.

If you are weird, then this will seem weird.
If you provide content, you will inform intrigue and curiosity which will fuel interest.

You still need to open up and provide possibilities and alternatives for her to think about.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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