"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Girl being flaky after I might have come off as a little over eager

Auburnfan2010

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Well I met this girl at work about a month ago. A week after we met we went on a date. The date went great. We had great conversation, lots of kino, she complimented me, and at the end of the night we kissed. She said she had a great time and we should do it again. Well a few days later I asked her again. She said she was busy with school. I told her that was cool and if she found time to let me know and I would see if i was available. Well I wait a couple of weeks and ask her again and same kind of response. I feel like if she was interested enough she would make time to do something. So I understand that. I will say that during the 2 weeks we still talked a little bit and she initiated a lot of it. My question is was I to over eager with her? And, can I turn this around or would I be wasting my time?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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bigneil

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The Formula:

1) Show her a good time.
2) Go NC until she writes to you.
3) Repeat.
 

sicsec

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NC her immediately. If you work with her thats impossible almost. But she probably thinks you are chasing her and have put her on a pedestal in your mind. I make this mistake here and there, Treat the real pretty girls like they are your cute younger cousin with sarcasm, kidding around and NO urgency for anything else and see how she responds to you. Women are like cats, give them too much attention they run a and hide, ignore them and relax they come and sit on your lap all night.
 

Zerro

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sicsec said:
NC her immediately. If you work with her thats impossible almost.
Depending on how big your workplace is, if you're even in the same department, etc then it can be nearly impossible or it can be rather easy. If you do have to talk to her to get your job done then just keep it professional and don't treat her differently than you'd treat any of your other co-workers.

sicsec said:
Treat the real pretty girls like they are your cute younger cousin with sarcasm, kidding around and NO urgency for anything else and see how she responds to you. Women are like cats, give them too much attention they run a and hide, ignore them and relax they come and sit on your lap all night.
There's one chick I know who's practically become a case-study for me over this: every guy who comes on strong gets pushed away after the first night while she practically stalks the ones who don't pay her much attention.
 

Auburnfan2010

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Thats the good thing. She works in another department so I don't see her hardly at all. I feel this can be turned around if I play my cards right. I'm not gonna push anything and just play it cool.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Auburnfan2010

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So the last 3 weeks or so I have really taken a step back on pursuing her. I have run into her a few times around work. She has texted me a couple of times during this time also. Well last week we bumped into each other a couple of times. She was real chatty and both times she reached out and tried to touch my shoulder. My question is should I keep doing what I'm doing to possibly still have a chance with her? I'm almost to the point of thinking there is no chance of anything because it has been 5 or 6 weeks since we hung out together. I'd appreciate any advice on this situation.
 

JoelyBoy

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use the 3 strikes rule man, and on the third strike, I would say something like, "So listen, it's probably time you asked me out for coffee isn't it?" in a jokey way (that maybe a little weak, but jokey), or if you wanna be the alfa then, "let's go out for coffee this thursday, about 8ish would be good". Either way, if she wants to she will, and even if she's busy she'll suggest another time/day.
That's how I would play the work colleague thing anyway. And if she turns you down move on i guess ;)
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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She has another dude. Plain and simple.
 

Auburnfan2010

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Yeah I figured she ia probably talking to some other guys. Its just weird because in my case, usually when they find someone else they become extremely cold,and she hadn't been like that. I think im just gonna let it ride for a couple of weeks, and then reevaluate the situation. Just about every girl I've ever dated no matter how long has eventually turned back and around an wanted me again after awoke of not talking to them
 
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