"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Read more...

Girl asked me to move w/her.

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
3,739
Reaction score
41
Age
45
Location
-777-Vegas-777-
There's a milf at my job (22yr old HB7.5) who I always figured had a thing for me but is engaged so I never moved on her. Anyway, she always complained about my fiance and how he barely works or makes any money blah blah blah. The only reason I listen to her is because I have nothing better to do...and the office is to limited for me to run away. So we've both been talking about how we're planning on leaving las vegas (It's nice but this uber party lifestyle has got to stop). She told me that she's moving to cali and I told her that I'm stuck between cali and florida.

So today she tells me that her fiance has gotten another ticket and he wants her mom to take care of it. He's a driver for some company and she's a lawyer so it's not that hard for her. Well, later on in the day I was in the back corresponding with our UK office by myself and she came back down next to me and flat out asked me if I wanted to move to cali with her and her kid! The kid is from her previous b/f who's apparently pretty nutzo, not her fiance. I asked her if she was serious, and she said yes because I'm a decent guy, good looking, I work too jobs blah blah blah she'd really like to break things off with her fiance and have me come with her.

She's lucky this is the only bad inccident I've heard about her other wise I would have blown up on her and told her she was f*cking smoking crack. However, since from what I've seen she's some what of a nice person I politely told her that she hadn't thought any of this through and she was acting on impulse only. We hadn't dated so she really doesn't know what I'm like outside the office, and first and foremost she should at least attempt to work things out with her fiance, a man who pledged to marry her while she was taking care of a kid that wasn't even his. He may be a loser in some respects, but I know a lot of "men" who wouldn't own up to such a big responsiblity.

After that she kissed me on the cheek and told me she'd see me at the christmas party. She still thinks she's making the right desicion trying to turn to me but she's going to take my advice anyway. Still there's no way I'd ever turn my life over to a girl I barely know who is with child and then abandon my single life to take up one of such complexity on a whim just because a girl is cute. I do however think I handled the situation fairly well keeping the tension low between us because we are co workers and the last thing I need is drama in my work life.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

KarmaSutra

Banned
Joined
Oct 13, 2005
Messages
4,818
Reaction score
142
Age
53
Location
Padron Reserve maduro in hand while finishing my b
Drop a load in her backdoor, Give her some Underoos for the kid, Take her to the airport and wave goodbye as she enters the elevator. . .


Now you're Mr. Sensitive.
 

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
3,739
Reaction score
41
Age
45
Location
-777-Vegas-777-
Originally posted by KarmaSutra
Drop a load in her backdoor, Give her some Underoos for the kid, Take her to the airport and wave goodbye as she enters the elevator. . .


Now you're Mr. Sensitive.
Doesnt "Karma" mean that I'll get what I give later on in life?

I did all I needed to to put her down, there's no need for anything too extreme here.
 

Docs

Banned
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
3,571
Reaction score
56
Location
Kingston, Can-a-duh
She wants security, that's what you have.

You have to honestly look at her offer...and then yours, and then decide what you get out of it?

Kiss her when she's about to leave and wish her luck. Just be lucky you haven't fallen for her, because she'll try her damnest to make you fall for her, kissing ass and being dragged along with nothing.

Good luck.
 

Tazman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 26, 2004
Messages
1,282
Reaction score
30
Age
47
she was f*cking smoking crack
This seems about right.

Realize that you only entertain her because she's attractive. What sane person would suggest such a thing?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Badmannaz

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 13, 2005
Messages
782
Reaction score
18
Location
entering the 4th quarter....
Originally posted by KarmaSutra
Drop a load in her backdoor, Give her some Underoos for the kid, Take her to the airport and wave goodbye as she enters the elevator. . .


Now you're Mr. Sensitive.

WTF????? are you smoking crack??? Not trying to insult you but i totally didn't get that!!!!
 

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
3,739
Reaction score
41
Age
45
Location
-777-Vegas-777-
Originally posted by Tazman
This seems about right.

Realize that you only entertain her because she's attractive. What sane person would suggest such a thing?
I think I tolorate her because of her attractiveness yes. But I doubt the outcome would of been to different if she were a 4 or a 5. I'm not too big on telling people off regardless of what they look like (unless I'm drinking, then all bets are off). In an office case like this one I'd in all likelyhood be just as diplomatic with an unattractive girl as I would with this one.

Again if she'd has a history of making ludacris statments like this to me then that might of altered my tactics slightly. I don't care what you look like, crazy is a life style and it pushes me the wrong way.
 

Tazman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 26, 2004
Messages
1,282
Reaction score
30
Age
47
No, no, I agree with how you handled it, no need to yell at her (or anyone) for making the comment. I just think it speaks volumes about her level of maturity and how crazy it would be to involve her child in something so ridiculous. Like you said, she's never even been on a date with you, but she'd be willing to move to another state and live with you? With her f*cking child? Could you even trust a woman like this? Sorry, the kid involved hit a sore spot with me.
 

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
3,739
Reaction score
41
Age
45
Location
-777-Vegas-777-
That i can agree with. She really doesn't know me at all, and to be honest if I would have said yes she'd be making the worst mistake of her life. Not to knock myself too bad but I'm not exactly what you'd call "parent material" at this stage of my life. I'm still in that free spirit mode and there's no way I could switch from that to taking a little girl to ballet and soccer in a mini van.

But at the same time I can see her furstration with the guy she's with. He barely works and when he does he f's up and expects her mother to take care of it so he never really learns his lesson. The guy smokes a lotta dope to and that's not exactly the best thing to be doing around a 2 year old. Not saying I don't have my vices, I drink quite a bit and, though not recently, I've been in and out of the drug scene for a few years of my life. Not to say that I'm not relatively stable becaue I dont' really depend on anyone for anything that i have. Still she should really be more careful with her self especially since she has a child. Rationality is crucial even more so for a young mother like herself.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Rovalier

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 28, 2005
Messages
150
Reaction score
2
Look what you did now. You gonna make her want you even more badly, she's probably crying over her failed attempt. I say she will try even harder next time to convince you. :D

Seriously though, you handled that situation pretty well. :up:
 
Top