Girl Asked for Text Reminder

[E-Male]

Hey all,

First time post here.

I'm a graduate student and yesterday I asked out a classmate of mine that I've been chatting up for a while now. She immediately said yes, which is good, but after we set up the day and time (this Friday night) she said, "Send me a text so I don't forget."

This caught me so off guard that I just blurted out some beta crap like, "Sure, yeah, okay." I know what I should have said (playfully teased her, saying that if she forgot it was her loss or some such thing), but again she caught me so off guard that I just spat that wussy response out.

So, the more I thought about it last night, I started to get ticked off. First, I took an order from her. Second, and more important, if she were really interested, she wouldn't forget and certainly not tell me that she might forget.

So I'm not planning on texting her, even though I said I would -- just gonna show up and see if she does too. But I'd like to see what some of you fellas would do. Let me know. Thanks.

 

[n52]

I'd have just responded with something witty like 'As if you'd be able to forget about a date with me' and then left the convo at that until date day.

Nonetheless what's done is done. I'd say don't text her until an hour or so before the date saying you're running a little late and may be 10-15 mins late. Not mentioning anything about reminding her, as if she didn't even say it in the first place.

Either way don't let it bother you, play it cool. You'll know immediately on the date whether she's on it or not.

 

[E-Male]

Not a bad idea, n52. I'll consider it. This girl has been somewhat flaky on me in the past, so I really don't want to give her any power so I may not text at all.

 

[n52]

Not a bad idea, n52. I'll consider it. This girl has been somewhat flaky on me in the past, so I really don't want to give her any power so I may not text at all.

Who know's maybe she's trying to act uninterested so she doesn't seem clingy. Only meeting her will let you decide that. The only way you won't give a fúck about what she says is by having other female options open so you can drop this one at any time.

 

[E-Male]

Yeah, who knows. Frankly, I'm almost inclined to do absolutely nothing, (I don't have time for bullcrap like this) but I'll see what happens in a couple days.

 

[n52]

Yeah, who knows. Frankly, I'm almost inclined to do absolutely nothing, (I don't have time for bullcrap like this) but I'll see what happens in a couple days.

You say she's been flaky in the past? How flaky is the question. If you were meant to go on a date before and she flaked I'd next her immediately until she schedules a new one. If not, she sent a harmless text this time. If she doesn't turn up next her.

 

[E-Male]

No, we haven't gone out other than one time with friends. So, this will be a first date. I've never been stood-up, so if she doesn't show Fri, it will be a blow to my (massively inflated) ego, ha!

 

[n52]

No, we haven't gone out other than one time with friends. So, this will be a first date. I've never been stood-up, so if she doesn't show Fri, it will be a blow to my (massively inflated) ego, ha!

Happens to the best of us. Just gotta walk it orf:rock:

 

[Bible_Belt]

"Send me a text so I don't forget."

That sounds like a job for Siri. Every phone has an alarm/reminder function. It's too late now, but that can be on the tip of your tongue if you hear that line again.

 

[E-Male]

Good one, Bible_Belt. Wouldn't work on this chick, though -- she has a "dumb phone."

 

[JoeMarron]

she has a "dumb phone."

Hah potential green flag. This means she isn't on social media 24/7. I wouldn't bother sending a text. If she shows up tease her about not reminding you to send her a reminder.

 

[ludis]

it's a sh|t test, if you text you fail.

 

[G_Govan]

I'm with ludis, it's a sh-t test and you simply don't comply. My reaction when she said it would've been a simple chuckle, like she's just joking. Pretty much brushed it off.

Show up for the date, but don't wait for more than 5 minutes if you don't see or hear from her. If she flakes, act like it isn't a big deal because it was never concrete and if she doesn't counter offer another date suggestion, next her for low interest.

 

[E-Male]

Excellent point, ludis and G_Govan. Hadn't thought about it that way (I've been out of the game for several years now in a long-term relationship. Still shaking the rust off). Thanks

G_Govan, 5 minutes, really? I usually give a girl longer than that even if they're not being flakey. I was planning on waiting maybe 15-20 and, if she doesn't show, texting all matter-of-factly, "Are you here?" (we're supposed to meet at a sports bar).

Joe, hey, a green flag is better than red, right?

 

[VladPatton]

Don't text anything. See what happens. I would of said "damn, how many dates you got lined up that you'll forget?!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=BaM5B0MBAoA#t=45

 

[pdx1138]

I'd just text her the day of the date in the morning:

"see you at 4" (or whatever the time or place is)

I never have subscribed to the idea of being late for a first date for the sake of it, especially for a first impression.

Just be mindful of maintaining the frame from then on.

 

[The LadyKiller]

Don't text anything. See what happens.

This is me too. If I confirm details in person or over the phone with a HB, I won't text the day of. As others have said, I don't text because I want to see if she remembers the date. If she doesn't, then chances are she was going to flake anyways.

I recently went on a date where I didn't text the day of, the girl brought up my "not texting," I brushed it off and everything ended up fine.

 

[E-Male]

Consensus seems to be agreeing with what I have planned -- i.e. not texting anything.

The thing is, the girl is extremely, extremely forgetful, so she might have honestly wanted the reminder. Still no excuse for not remembering, so we'll see if she shows up tomorrow night or just flakes on me.

 

[Purefilth]

sounds like an excuse to flake when you text -

"oh I forgot - now I'm doing xyz - sooo sorry!"

or something like that

 

[Alvafe]

nope, even the most forgetfull people will remember something they want or like, hell even me who forget things and hate to wake up in the morning, do it without a problem when I will go do skydiving or rafting.

just stay cool and go there, one thing I would do I read here was send her a text saying sorry I didn't show up but something happen, if of course she don't show up.

edit. also what purefilth said, I did get that one too, just to be be told she forgot and did is doing something else, thing syou learn over time and here is really something...