"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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GF tells me how some random guy hitted on her..hmm translate

shark

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so im on the phone talking w/ her and she goes "the weirest thing happend tonight...i was eating with my family and we left and some guy comes up to me and says hey sexy girl...and i gave him a dirty look. then my dad just say what the hell and that i should be happy that guys give me that attention"

So i was like ok thats weird whatever. Why'd she say this? Normal or she wants attention or what? and how should i react or is it o late and drop it
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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In2theGame

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Originally posted by shark
so im on the phone talking w/ her and she goes "the weirest thing happend tonight...i was eating with my family and we left and some guy comes up to me and says hey sexy girl...and i gave him a dirty look. then my dad just say what the hell and that i should be happy that guys give me that attention"

So i was like ok thats weird whatever. Why'd she say this? Normal or she wants attention or what? and how should i react or is it o late and drop it
Your just paranoid, doesnt mean anything IMO. Girls like to talk and your girlfriend was probably just sharing her day with you.
 

DJStudent

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I think girls say that so that they can get you jealous. Just like you would if you want to impress a girls and said "Oh some girl gave me her number today". She's just playing with you.
 

TheRelic

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She was CLEARLY was with him at the club, and got his number for a repeat encounter.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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She doesn't feel that you value her so she is showing you that someone else does.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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The_Lifter

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Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
She doesn't feel that you value her so she is showing you that someone else does.
So is the best technique to completely ignore these instances or address them in some way?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Originally posted by The_Lifter
So is the best technique to completely ignore these instances or address them in some way?
If you ignore them a DJ (like me) will eventually test her will so thoroughly that she may stray. But you also don't want to address them in a way that would make you look jealous, that's not attractive.

The way that I usually handle instances like that is by acknowledging that "yes" other guys will find her attractive and will add a line like "Why do you think I keep you around? ;)" Yes, the wink is a key factor in the response. In that one response you have shown her:

  1. That you acknowledge that other men find her attractive and you are self confident enough that it does not bother you.
  2. That you yourself find her attractive.
  3. That you won't get jealous if she brings up things like this in the future so her pushing your "jealous button" will have no effect on you.
  4. That you appreciate having her around even just for your amusement.
  5. That you "could" cut her off if she doesn't keep up in the looks department.
  6. That you aren't like other guys, you are actually in control of yourself.
    [/list=1]

    Seems like a lot of sh1t that came out of that one line, right? Understanding a woman's mind explains it. They are extremely imaginative and read into every action and word that you say (magazines like Cosmo enforces this).

    Knowing this allows you to get your point across without getting into a long, uncontrolled argument. You make your c/f statement that should nip the issue in the bud unless she is a drama queen that doesn't realize what a catch she has in her DJ boyfriend. Women like that will make the relationship self destruct. So be it, they aren't worth your time anyway.
 

ethnomethodologist

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LOL for a beginner DJ, it is better to show jealousy, than to show indifference.

I have many alpha male friends, all of their GF's talk about WANTING to make him jealous. They love the attention and the confirmation that 'THEIR MAN' will stand up for whats right, and SHOW how much he loves her to other people.

Whether with words or actions is your call.
 

NoNickname

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Originally posted by DJStudent
I think girls say that so that they can get you jealous. Just like you would if you want to impress a girls and said "Oh some girl gave me her number today". She's just playing with you.
There's a girl who I'm into, but has a boyfriend. There has always been a little thing between us, and we're flirting and having a good time when we're together. After she got her boyfriend, she has been talking about him a lot. How great he is and how the bracelet he gave her had "saved her" twice (this was just bull****) and so on. I think she's testing me.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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The_Lifter

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Cheers for the reply Francisco. This is exactly what I was thinking. Up until now I'd just been deflecting them and conveying that her attempts at jealousy aren't going to wash with me but lately I've grown aware that she doesn't think I care about her in the slightest and that I just laugh at her all the time - alarm bells were ringing, I'm overdoing it.

Many thanks for the guidance.
 
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biker_gixxer

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Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
She doesn't feel that you value her so she is showing you that someone else does.
Amen...
 
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