"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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GF gets Mad over Twitter

Fela Kuti

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If your GF gets mad because you don't reply to some of her updates, would you consider it silly or reasonable? And it's not big deal of updates either. Something like "want to buy new shoes" or "feeling hungry".
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Perry

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I believe this is the first twitter thread, I hope its also the last.
 

Captain

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Fela Kuti said:
If your GF gets mad because you don't reply to some of her updates, would you consider it silly or reasonable? And it's not big deal of updates either. Something like "want to buy new shoes" or "feeling hungry".
Don't reply to them. I mean, you've got better things to do. Right?

You shouldn't reply to any of her twitters. I wouldn't.

Next time she gets mad, just ignore her and wait for her ridiculous tantrum to end. If she keeps nagging and getting mad, tell her to stop. If she argues or continues to throw tantrums, leave her.
 

Allurre

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Wow. This is ridiculous lol. If your GF gets all fidgety and annoyed that you didn't REPLY to her TWEETS, she's got problems.

I barely reply to half my incoming tweet messages.

Do not tolerate this behavior. It's childish.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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WC2

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I smell attention wh0re. I also sense she's wearing the pants in this particular relationship.
 

speakeasy

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The server that houses twitter should be blown up with a daisy cutter.
 

Da Realist

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Depends on what she's saying. You shouldn't respond to her every whim. Then again, why are you looking at twitter to begin with?
 

Fela Kuti

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Da Realist said:
Depends on what she's saying. You shouldn't respond to her every whim. Then again, why are you looking at twitter to begin with?
It seems that Twitter is underrated around here. I look at Twitter because I can get updates about music and films in one click.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Da Realist

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Fela Kuti said:
It seems that Twitter is underrated around here. I look at Twitter because I can get updates about music and films in one click.
Are you just posting this to advertise for twitter? If not, I've got the perfect advice for you: stay off of twitter for a while. She knows you go on and she posts stuff to get your attention. If she didn't think you went on there so much, you wouldn't be having this problem. When she has to post on a networking site to get your attentiuon, something is wrong somewhere. Either she's an AW as people put it, or you spend way too much time on twitter. I'm not saying it to be mean because I've had a girl to sit on my shoulder while I was playing a video game just to get my attention after she came over. If the latter holds true, just give her a little more offline attention. If she's just an AW, get off twitter for a while anyway just so she can move on to something else.
 
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