The Comeback Kid
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 4, 2005
- Messages
- 591
- Reaction score
- 5
Throughout my life, I've had a bit of trouble when it comes to getting dates. I've only gone on a couple of dates my entire life and have never been in a serious relationship - not even close.
Most of these woes occured when I was in high school. I was never afraid to put myself on the line when asking a girl out, but nothing ever worked out. I asked out about 10 girls between 10th-12th grade, and every single one said no (I think I went on one "date" and that was it). And not just a LJBF no either - a rude, painful no that was very uncalled for. Some oddities here include the Homecoming Queen for my grade "disappearing" when it was time for the King/Queen dance (I won Homecoming King for my grade two years in a row, but I was only present for the second), no date for Junior Prom (I didn't plan on going anyway, but nothing looked promising) and I didn't even go to my Senior Prom - I asked several girls to go but I ended up with no one.
These continuous letdowns would cause many guys to plummet, but not me. I don't lose my cool often, but I also tend to also compress my anger in the process. When I began college, I found a place to let this anger out: the gym. I am a workout freak, lifting and running every other day (and with no stimulants of any sort
). All of a sudden, I, the guy who was once called "little and skinny" is now being asked if I take steroids. While I lift primarily to improve myself, it's nice to see that other people notice, and my friends tell me I get a lot of looks from girls now as well.
Those last two paragraphs served as more of a background. Now, as a Sophomore, I am hoping my luck will change. I have a lot of acquaintances, but never became real close with a girl, even on the friend level. All the time, I know girls who get along with certain guys real well and they hang out together (more like friends). I have never been able to establish this with any girl. As for dates, same thing. I simply have trouble getting one, no matter what I do - even when I have the girl's number and have given a call. The date can even be as small as going to the dining hall for dinner, and I'm having trouble. It seems anyone can get a date and it's not all that difficult, but I've just been "unlucky."
I don't know what I am doing that puts off girls, but it must be something. In high school, I could point to my smallish frame, but not anymore. Sure, I am short (5'6"), but I am well-built (six pack, big arms and chest, etc.). I also know I tend to get a bit arrogant when I get frustrated. The final knock against myself that I know is that people think I'm too energetic. Nonono, not "energetic" as in someone who will be real loud and will start singing/dancing at any moment, I mean "energetic" as someone who always seems upbeat and happy, always active, and someone who is always up for a chat (I know it doesn't sound like a bad thing, but sometimes it could rub people the wrong way).
Any thoughts on this - what could help me in getting just one date, whether it's going out somewhere or even a date for a dance? I feel I should be able to get a date, as I believe I am physically attractive, posess a good personality and I don't really lose my composure. I have also improved my "game" and am pretty confident in myself. Any help here is appreciated.
Most of these woes occured when I was in high school. I was never afraid to put myself on the line when asking a girl out, but nothing ever worked out. I asked out about 10 girls between 10th-12th grade, and every single one said no (I think I went on one "date" and that was it). And not just a LJBF no either - a rude, painful no that was very uncalled for. Some oddities here include the Homecoming Queen for my grade "disappearing" when it was time for the King/Queen dance (I won Homecoming King for my grade two years in a row, but I was only present for the second), no date for Junior Prom (I didn't plan on going anyway, but nothing looked promising) and I didn't even go to my Senior Prom - I asked several girls to go but I ended up with no one.
These continuous letdowns would cause many guys to plummet, but not me. I don't lose my cool often, but I also tend to also compress my anger in the process. When I began college, I found a place to let this anger out: the gym. I am a workout freak, lifting and running every other day (and with no stimulants of any sort
). All of a sudden, I, the guy who was once called "little and skinny" is now being asked if I take steroids. While I lift primarily to improve myself, it's nice to see that other people notice, and my friends tell me I get a lot of looks from girls now as well.Those last two paragraphs served as more of a background. Now, as a Sophomore, I am hoping my luck will change. I have a lot of acquaintances, but never became real close with a girl, even on the friend level. All the time, I know girls who get along with certain guys real well and they hang out together (more like friends). I have never been able to establish this with any girl. As for dates, same thing. I simply have trouble getting one, no matter what I do - even when I have the girl's number and have given a call. The date can even be as small as going to the dining hall for dinner, and I'm having trouble. It seems anyone can get a date and it's not all that difficult, but I've just been "unlucky."
I don't know what I am doing that puts off girls, but it must be something. In high school, I could point to my smallish frame, but not anymore. Sure, I am short (5'6"), but I am well-built (six pack, big arms and chest, etc.). I also know I tend to get a bit arrogant when I get frustrated. The final knock against myself that I know is that people think I'm too energetic. Nonono, not "energetic" as in someone who will be real loud and will start singing/dancing at any moment, I mean "energetic" as someone who always seems upbeat and happy, always active, and someone who is always up for a chat (I know it doesn't sound like a bad thing, but sometimes it could rub people the wrong way).
Any thoughts on this - what could help me in getting just one date, whether it's going out somewhere or even a date for a dance? I feel I should be able to get a date, as I believe I am physically attractive, posess a good personality and I don't really lose my composure. I have also improved my "game" and am pretty confident in myself. Any help here is appreciated.