Getting married in secrecy.

[Mr.Positive]

Marriage if often discussed here, and I'm sure most of us agree under current marriage law, men have the disadvantage legally. We also discuss how marriage can often completely change the relationship dynamics because of this, and the importance of completely qualifying women before taking the leap.

I think I have an idea on how we can take back the true values of marriage, and at the same time, provide the ultimate test to the woman we choose to marry.

I was watching the movie Braveheart the other day, and how braveheart and his wife married in secrecy because the ruling powers, the british, would have sex with the newlywed wife on the day of marriage. So, they married in secrecy, and kept the government out of their affairs. This is similar to today actually, except it's the new husband that gets bent over by the government.

So what about getting married in secrecy today?

If you are religious, get married in the eyes of God, in a church, in secrecy. Find a priest you trust in your religion. Don't tell the state. Both man and wife move in together, but keep seperate legal addresses with family, etc. Be married in the eyes of God, how it should be. Have children, but file joint custody, etc. File taxes as single status...separate bank accounts, separate incomes.

This also just proves without a doubt, that the women you marry is out of love, with true intentions.

I think this can be done, and is what men should start doing. Also, it would be one ballsy thing to do...and one hellofa statement to make. That marriage should be a union, a life commitment, instead of a legal contract.

 

[LeftyLoosey]

Impossible. You can take all of those steps, and your woman can still get upset one day, demonstrate to a lawyer that you've lived at the same address for long enough to be considered common-law, and still take half your **** and ask for alimony.

 

[Mr.Positive]

Impossible. You can take all of those steps, and your woman can still get upset one day, demonstrate to a lawyer that you've lived at the same address for long enough to be considered common-law, and still take half your **** and ask for alimony.

Well, if you had the house in your name, and her legal address somewhere else...do you think she could still prove that she lived there under common law? Might be hard for her to do.

I know the biggest question is why even bother? I'm just reconnecting to my religious side lately. I've found, I'm not against marriage, just against what it's legally become.

 

[sodbuster]

SOL,most ministers have to fill out the forms for the government.

 

[LeftyLoosey]

Well, if you had the house in your name, and her legal address somewhere else...do you think she could still prove that she lived there under common law? Might be hard for her to do.

I know the biggest question is why even bother? I'm just reconnecting to my religious side lately. I've found, I'm not against marriage, just against what it's legally become.

The law would have to change before marriage could be risk-free for a man. A woman cannot give up her leverage even if she wants to. The only way for a man to keep it is to keep his schlong wrapped and to not live with a woman.

 

[Mr.Positive]

SOL,most ministers have to fill out the forms for the government.

This is what I was concerned about. I did find out though, that what I'm trying to understand is if it's possible to enter into holy matrimony, in the Church, without actually getting married, technically married that is.

Maybe I should discuss my concerns with a priest.

 

[Scaramouche]

Hey Positive,
You could always do a Woody Allan and live separately,many advantages in being TLA together living apart.

 

[DJDamage]

Hey Positive,
You could always do a Woody Allan and live separately,many advantages in being TLA together living apart.

Unfortunately most men are not as famous or as rich as Woody Allen that can afford to pay their significant other their own apartment. Beside's Woody gamed his step daughter, that is messed up already.

Every long term investment a man makes with a woman will require him to cater to her whims on some level while sacrificing his.

You can't find loopeholes, there will always be a trap hidden somewhere. Whatever you do just make sure you choose the best course of action for you, pick a good woman and hold the upper hand in the long terms.

 

[CaptainJ]

What's wrong with prenups? Do they not work?

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear All,
Most women are so hung up on this marriage merry go round they would not even consider anything less than the "Full Monty"....I can still remember the hassle I had getting my last wife to sign on the dotted line of a Pre Nuptial...The word distrust was mentioned a lot...in the end it was the best thing I ever did,by digging my heels in on that one.

 

[Colossus]

This sounds like a good idea on paper, but i agree with scaramouche---good luck finding a woman who will go for it. Even if you do, I bet it will come back to bite you when she sees that she isnt getting the spoils of mariage that she 'deserves'.

Better to sign a prenup to at least protect what you have, or have a marriage ceremony but dont sign a marriage license. This is doable, but you need to check common-law statutes in your state.

 

[Jitterbug]

Love the Braveheart stuff, but it works in Braveheart as both bride & groom were trying not to get screwed & disposed by the government, while in your case, the bride would get handsomely rewarded by the government by joining in to screw the groom.

Better check what prenups mean in your state. I know in Australia, they now mean jack sh!t. The Family-destroying Court has a million reasons to throw them out like toilet papers, particularly if kids are involved.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Jitterbug,
You are right about Pre Nups being thrown out,mine was,but was readmitted as a Contract,In the end it meant the same thing...I was really glad I had it....At the least a pre Nup is a basis to work from.

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

Scenario: A guy is coming into ownership of farmland. In addition to these assets, he owns his own farm and makes a good living in a white collar job. If he was someday considering marriage, how does he best shield his assets from his soon-to-be wife?

Couldn't you just put your assets into a trust or under a LLC before getting married? I mean, she can always come after your cash, the courts will raid money markets, 401Ks, annuities, smashing them all up and generating gigantic fees in their wake of destruction. But if your physical assets are held "in fiducia" with a lawyer or bank, what happens then?