"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Getting her to qualify to you
- Thread starter Casino
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
George Gordon
Banned
Why use tactics trying to get women to qualify themselves to you when you can simply qualify women? Using techniques to get a woman to want your approval is ironic. Why? Because by using these tactics, you're core is seeking their approval.
Masculinity calls for you to need no one's approval. You abandon all opinions about yourself, but your own. Your desire and conviction belong only to you. Let no one take them from you.
After all, why would you want to accept a woman into your confidence until you've fully tested her, and she's fully proved herself to you over time?
Start qualifing women. That's the solution. "Do I want her? Does she fit into my world? Is she continuing to fit into my world as our relationship passes time?"
And when you start qualifying women, they start seeking your approval because they notice that you refuse to validate women simply because they're sexy. Or anyone for that matter.
I think more than anything, women watch how you communicate with everyone you interact with. And if they notice other people begging for your approval, she'll start asking for it too? "Do you like my necklace?" "Do you think I should get my hair cut shorter?" Still, refuse to give it to her.
The more attractive I become, the more I notice that it's because of what I stop doing. Rarely, what I start doing. And this seems to come across through body language strongly, yet naturally and effortlessly.
I think all men can be powerfully attractive. But few realize that it's what they refuse to do. Not what they think they should start doing.
Treat your confidence like gold. Only give it to people who have proved themselves to you. And accept no currency from others, other than gold.
Do that, and women will start wanting your approval. Do it not, and you will continue to beg for women and others approval, perhaps without noticing it.
!GEORGE GORDON!
Masculinity calls for you to need no one's approval. You abandon all opinions about yourself, but your own. Your desire and conviction belong only to you. Let no one take them from you.
After all, why would you want to accept a woman into your confidence until you've fully tested her, and she's fully proved herself to you over time?
Start qualifing women. That's the solution. "Do I want her? Does she fit into my world? Is she continuing to fit into my world as our relationship passes time?"
And when you start qualifying women, they start seeking your approval because they notice that you refuse to validate women simply because they're sexy. Or anyone for that matter.
I think more than anything, women watch how you communicate with everyone you interact with. And if they notice other people begging for your approval, she'll start asking for it too? "Do you like my necklace?" "Do you think I should get my hair cut shorter?" Still, refuse to give it to her.
The more attractive I become, the more I notice that it's because of what I stop doing. Rarely, what I start doing. And this seems to come across through body language strongly, yet naturally and effortlessly.
I think all men can be powerfully attractive. But few realize that it's what they refuse to do. Not what they think they should start doing.
Treat your confidence like gold. Only give it to people who have proved themselves to you. And accept no currency from others, other than gold.
Do that, and women will start wanting your approval. Do it not, and you will continue to beg for women and others approval, perhaps without noticing it.
!GEORGE GORDON!
I totally understand what cha saying. But i still have a few questions,
1) When you're asking friends questions about the situation are you not being the alpha male? (for example, asking questions like "where's andrew?", "what did he say?" and "what???, what's going on?") Are all these question acting submissive?
2) How do you get people to beg for your approval? I think am a very confident person and have present good body language and that is why they ask me for some approval, but i want them to ask me more more approval, how do i go about doing that?
h2o
Banned
very well said, and very true.
just don't qualify them too much, because after some length of time (depending on the girl), she will lose interest and regard you as arrogant ass. don't let your ego get in the way too much...you're not god.
i find myself having to remind myself of that every once in a while, because such behavior can also be detrimental.
I guess some of us are in "the game" for different reasons. Before I found the community I was already confident. Very alpha like. I could attract women.
I agree with the whole "Alpha" and "Be a man" thing to an extent but I think some of you guys take it a little to seriously.
For example:
Nothing is wrong with that statement that he made, although I will argue that being alpha doesn't necessarily mean be some uncompromising John Wayne type figure..you can be Alpha and still listen to other peoples opinions.
To be honest I'm in the game for the social engineering aspect. You can call me a little bit of an a-hole but I love to manipulate people especially women.
Anyways...pimp on and continue the debate.
I agree with the whole "Alpha" and "Be a man" thing to an extent but I think some of you guys take it a little to seriously.
For example:
I'm talking about doing approaches and getting girls to start qualifying and dude goes all Dr. Phil on me lol (no offense)
Nothing is wrong with that statement that he made, although I will argue that being alpha doesn't necessarily mean be some uncompromising John Wayne type figure..you can be Alpha and still listen to other peoples opinions.
To be honest I'm in the game for the social engineering aspect. You can call me a little bit of an a-hole but I love to manipulate people especially women.
Anyways...pimp on and continue the debate.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
George Gordon
Banned
Docka
First, what exactly are you asking in your first question? I don't understand where it's coming from or how it relates to what this thread is about. Clarify.
However, it rarely matters what you say. What matters is how you say what you do. Your power will always lie in the meaning you give to your communication. Words mean nothing until you put your conviction behind them.
If a Nice Guy compliments a woman, he comes off desperate. But if a Cool Guy compliments a woman, she'll be flattered.
Second, if you want people to want your approval, you're seeking their approval. The only way to get people begging for your approval is to be indifferent about it. Really, it's when you could care less what other people think about you that others will start looking to you for approval.
Personally, I hate it when other guys look to me for approval. It's damn annoying.
Casino
In the feminized age that we live in, don't you think it would be unwise to take your masculinity half-heartedly? A man should take his life seriously. But that hardly means that it shouldn't be enjoyable and fun.
Look. What one thing does the effectiveness of an approach come down to? You. It's always you. That is why I focus on the thinking. If my thinking is organized and accurate, so will my actions. Approaches then happen naturally. And they're genuine because I'm authentic.
And when it comes to success with women (and life), it seems to me that there are two major battles. One war is the self dualing with insecurity. Yet where does insecurity come from? Doesn't it come from a guy's concern about how others perceive him?
That is why I stress needing no one's approval. When a man validates himself, he defeats insecurity. And because he looks to no one for permission, others sense it in him and want his validation.
And just because a man validates himself barely means other people's opinions become unimportant to him.
I never said that you should refuse to listen to other people's opinions. What I did say was that a man should refuse to accept any opinion others have about HIM. Why would anyone want to live their life by the image others project onto them? No! We create our own image, and bring it into the world we create.
But as far as listening to others goes, I listen only to those who share similar values. And it's easy to make that distinction. As soon as I sense someone has different values than I do, I shut the door. They no longer have a chance at getting my confidence.
Simple.
By the way, who is Dr. Phil?
And h2o
I say qualify as much as you want. Or as much as you have to, to get what you want. When you know what you want in a woman, why settle for anything less? And to do that, it means qualify, qualify, qualify.
When you qualify, a woman will rarely lose interest. If anything, it will go up. But if it seems like she does lose interest, all she's really done is given up on it because she thinks she has little chance with you.
My take, anyway.
!GEORGE GORDON!
First, what exactly are you asking in your first question? I don't understand where it's coming from or how it relates to what this thread is about. Clarify.
However, it rarely matters what you say. What matters is how you say what you do. Your power will always lie in the meaning you give to your communication. Words mean nothing until you put your conviction behind them.
If a Nice Guy compliments a woman, he comes off desperate. But if a Cool Guy compliments a woman, she'll be flattered.
Second, if you want people to want your approval, you're seeking their approval. The only way to get people begging for your approval is to be indifferent about it. Really, it's when you could care less what other people think about you that others will start looking to you for approval.
Personally, I hate it when other guys look to me for approval. It's damn annoying.
Casino
In the feminized age that we live in, don't you think it would be unwise to take your masculinity half-heartedly? A man should take his life seriously. But that hardly means that it shouldn't be enjoyable and fun.
Look. What one thing does the effectiveness of an approach come down to? You. It's always you. That is why I focus on the thinking. If my thinking is organized and accurate, so will my actions. Approaches then happen naturally. And they're genuine because I'm authentic.
And when it comes to success with women (and life), it seems to me that there are two major battles. One war is the self dualing with insecurity. Yet where does insecurity come from? Doesn't it come from a guy's concern about how others perceive him?
That is why I stress needing no one's approval. When a man validates himself, he defeats insecurity. And because he looks to no one for permission, others sense it in him and want his validation.
And just because a man validates himself barely means other people's opinions become unimportant to him.
I never said that you should refuse to listen to other people's opinions. What I did say was that a man should refuse to accept any opinion others have about HIM. Why would anyone want to live their life by the image others project onto them? No! We create our own image, and bring it into the world we create.
But as far as listening to others goes, I listen only to those who share similar values. And it's easy to make that distinction. As soon as I sense someone has different values than I do, I shut the door. They no longer have a chance at getting my confidence.
Simple.
By the way, who is Dr. Phil?
And h2o
I say qualify as much as you want. Or as much as you have to, to get what you want. When you know what you want in a woman, why settle for anything less? And to do that, it means qualify, qualify, qualify.
When you qualify, a woman will rarely lose interest. If anything, it will go up. But if it seems like she does lose interest, all she's really done is given up on it because she thinks she has little chance with you.
My take, anyway.
!GEORGE GORDON!
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h2o
Banned
yeah you're right. because those times that they've gotten bored and gone away have been times when they had low IL to begin with. that first post of yours (to this thread) should be a tip in itself.