Getting her to pay attention to me....

[mpapps89]

I can talk to girls pretty well, but I notice a lot of times (even with girls I know), they won't even listen to me. I speak, and they just ignore. Now sometimes they may be talking to someone else, but a lot of times, she just isn't listening. Tips?

I seem like an innocent, nice guy, at least I (unintentionally) come off as one, which I expect is part of the problem. Any advice on correcting this? Girls just don't listen to me!

 

[everywomanshero]

Here;s what I think; you're already setting yourself up for disaster by your cognitive processes. I would forget about "building attraction" and all this nonsense people on the Internet tend to talk about. Focus on something much simpler.

First the norm of reciprocity: If you're friendly to others, over time the odds are more people will be friendly back to you.

Proximity is relational statistic: The closer you are to someone, the greater statistical chance you'll end up together. Be in proximity to the kinds of women you;d like to be with, and you've already increased the speed in which it will likely happen.

Manage expectations: Conflict is related to relationship satisfaction, and people tend to have the same conflicts over and over again. Also be aware that men tend to fall in love faster and be less utilitarian in relationships than women do. Contrary to popular belief, you'll likely want a LTR before she does, and you'll be more idealistic than she is. I say this not to sound cold, but to say that if she's not moving as fast as you are, there is a gender and age discrepency in how people respond to this.

 

[Metaphysical]

You need to develop more masculinity. The stronger your presence the more will people shut up and actually pay attention.

 

[mtlwlu]

Start working out.

 

[DJDamage]

Your a nice guy.

Being a former "nice guy" (a guy without a backbone), I know exectly how you feel.

You probably talk with a higher pitch then most guys, your volume is lower then most guys, but the bottom line is that you may be lacking some social skills (a good sense of humor and timing) and you probably don't really have anything interesting to say to women (most women have the attention span of little children). You can certainly work on your flaws by going out more, be around women more, taking more chances and risks with your voice and demeanour. Developing C&F attitude will do wonders to your game.

Also you might want to hit the gym and work out so you will command a greater presence when you stand/talk and be more attractive to the opposite sex, so girls would pay more attention to you (even if you don't have anything good to say).

 

[Mavrick]

Start making a habit out of slow talking. It shows that you have confidence in yourself and what you're saying. I want you to try it with some, but practice talking slow to yourself for a little bit to get the hang of it.

Come back and let me know if it helped.

 

[DonJuan11]

I can talk to girls pretty well, but I notice a lot of times (even with girls I know), they won't even listen to me. I speak, and they just ignore. Now sometimes they may be talking to someone else, but a lot of times, she just isn't listening. Tips?

Don't talk about Star Wars, Star Trek, Gaming, Checkers, or your pet hamster

I seem like an innocent, nice guy, at least I (unintentionally) come off as one, which I expect is part of the problem. Any advice on correcting this? Girls just don't listen to me!

They don't listen because you are not interesting enough.