"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Getting Girl to be Girlfriend

WORKEROUTER

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 9, 2003
Messages
1,514
Reaction score
9
Location
WA
There's this girl I've seen for a couple months off and on, and lately, we've been acting like we're in a relationship when we're together.

However, we've never really talked about having a serious relationship. I wouldn't mind going out with this chick (her as a girlfriend), but should I wait for HER to bring it up? Should I just keep playing it cool right now and trying to boost the interest level?

I realize that she may just be one of those women who digs the attention, and in fact not ALL THAT interested in me, so I am still keeping my options open.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Intheirheads

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 26, 2004
Messages
15
Reaction score
0
Location
Cleveland
boost her IL man, but keep your options open cause you dont know yet what her intentions are. Have fun and dont get caught up in anything emotional- just enjoy the ride.
 

TizZle

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 12, 2004
Messages
433
Reaction score
6
And wait for her to bring up the subject of becoming exclusive. It's in the bible if you havent read it.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Fenderules

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 31, 2003
Messages
873
Reaction score
1
Age
40
Location
Alberta
yeah just try some stuf like kino and see how she responds (rubbing and thouching)
 

Don Juanabbe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 28, 2004
Messages
1,278
Reaction score
8
Location
Canuckistan
Originally posted by WORKEROUTER
There's this girl I've seen for a couple months off and on, and lately, we've been acting like we're in a relationship when we're together.

However, we've never really talked about having a serious relationship. I wouldn't mind going out with this chick (her as a girlfriend), but should I wait for HER to bring it up? Should I just keep playing it cool right now and trying to boost the interest level?

I realize that she may just be one of those women who digs the attention, and in fact not ALL THAT interested in me, so I am still keeping my options open.
What kind of relationship do you think it is? An intimate relationship? Have you been intimate with this girl?

If so, then you should be judging this girl by her actions. What is her behaviour like? Does she call you alot?

Your job here is not to necessarily bring it up, but you better be making sure that you are projecting your interest through your actions. Embracing, kissing, sex and all that? Is that happening, or are you in the friends zone, and you are just confusing it with a relationship?

Keep showing her a great time, but keep it cool.

Do the things that will amp her interest level up, if you do the job right, you will have her asking you about it soon enough.

Surely friends have been commenting about it to the both of you?
 

Hot Ice

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2002
Messages
1,667
Reaction score
3
Location
Finland
I agree that you should wait her to bring it up. Just have fun all the times and boost the IL. She'll bring it up if her IL is high enough and if she's interested in LTR generally!


I've been in your situation few times.
If I were you, I would go and date other chicks as well.

That's for three reasons:
1) You'll have backup if things doesn't go well after all.
2) You have some basis to compare if she really IS LTR material
3) You are able to keep your head more free from emotions and feelings that can seriously lead you to wrong decisions.

One way to determine your true feelings toward her is to keep attention to your feelings and thoughts about her after you've had sex/masturbated. Asking yourself questions is SHE (not her pvssy!) worth all this effort. After you have blown your swimming team as far as you can, you see things more clear you know.


Just be laid back, have fun, and don't be needy at all.
Also remember to only give respect to those who respect you.
 

WORKEROUTER

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 9, 2003
Messages
1,514
Reaction score
9
Location
WA
Re: Re: Getting Girl to be Girlfriend

Originally posted by Don Juanabbe
What kind of relationship do you think it is? An intimate relationship? Have you been intimate with this girl?

If so, then you should be judging this girl by her actions. What is her behaviour like? Does she call you alot?

Your job here is not to necessarily bring it up, but you better be making sure that you are projecting your interest through your actions. Embracing, kissing, sex and all that? Is that happening, or are you in the friends zone, and you are just confusing it with a relationship?

Keep showing her a great time, but keep it cool.

Do the things that will amp her interest level up, if you do the job right, you will have her asking you about it soon enough.

Surely friends have been commenting about it to the both of you?
Ya we've been intimate together, and I can tell that she is gradually liking me more.

Initially, we would do stuff together, but I think she was just having some fun...she even tried to use the LJBF line on me in the past, to which I totally blocked off and told her that I have enough friends.

By applying DJ skills as best as I could, however, I turned it around (at least it seems this way), and have tremendously boosted the interest level.

I started to fall back to AFC mode lately and made a couple wrong moves, but after reviewing the bible, I think I am back on my feet.

I agree with all of you that the best thing to do here is to have fun when I am with her, continue to boost the IL, and continue to pursue other women on the side....and then allow HER to bring up a more serious relationship.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Don Juanabbe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 28, 2004
Messages
1,278
Reaction score
8
Location
Canuckistan
Yeah, if she tried to use the LJBF crap on you, then I wouldn't advise slipping back into AFC mode at all.

She could have tried that for a number of different reasons, it's kind of strange to me, but I would see other women if you can.

Why do you suspect she tried that? Also, how often are you seeing her?
 

becker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 13, 2003
Messages
1,697
Reaction score
4
I'm in a situation right now where I'm dating this girl, and we started out as casual friends. She throws out all sorts of mixed messages, essentially telling me that based on her past (she hasn't had many relationships) she tends to get out of relationships because she gets "bored" after a while.

Anyways, she's openly suggested we be friends w/ benefits, to which I obliged, and we've been that. However, at the same time, she's calling me all the time and asking me to hang out. It's a strange situation, because she tells me that she doesn't believe in dating more than one person at a time, which means that the fact that we're dating means she's not seeing other guys. But at the same time, she hasn't really pressed the exclusivity issue. I guess I should just enjoy fooling around with her.
 
Top