Getting frustrated at my mom, and vice versa...

[ScrewIt]

I really dont know how to start this thread off...well here goes..

First off i work this weekday job, and i can pretty come in whenever i want.

And it seems my mom's a loner and not as independent as i had thought. These past few months have revealed much about her.
Such as her getting emotional on me, when its not even my fault.

here are some examples of the point im trying to get at:
There was one time i had to bring her to the passport center to get it renewed. Then afterwards, she wanted to go eat, or perhaps go shopping. I said i wasnt hungry and had to meet up with my friend. Then she tells me to go. i can tell she was mad, as later she called me on the phone to ***** about it.

The other day, she picked up my sister early from school. i guess she was hungry and wanted to eat, my dad had went out and i was ready to go to work...well she called us both to come out and eat with her.

Yesterday she had asked me how to say the word "expired" (she's not too good at english). i pronounced it. Then she asked me hwo to spell it, i told her to ask my sister ...to give her a chance (she is in school after all). Then after awhile she got all pissed and emotional on me...*****ing about how hard it is to ask something of me. And at that time i had told my sister to write the word down on paper.

She was back to normal this morning, and wanted to get a refund on possible expired food she had bought yesterday. She doesnt know english, and it was near my workplace so i agreed. eventually, i found out the food wasnt expired...then she asked me how much the tums were (the price was labeled). Then i said "look i dont have a lot of free time, i gotta get to work." She said bye and i waved bye. of course when i said that, i was pissed at that point.

When this **** happens, i feel bad about making her feel bad.

Sometimes i wonder if she's causing me to react this way or is it vice versa. I mean, she's not nobody, she is my mom afterall...

any solutions?

 

[Julian]

Yo i know the feeling. my mom is german. she speaks decent english but with a heavy accent.

You gotta have patience man. Afterall she is from another country and probably not as smart as you.

I think you need to stop flippin out over the little things she does that are probably massively annoying to you.

She was probably hurt that you didnt want to go eat with her, she probably just wanted to bond with you over a nice meal.

 

[ScrewIt]

Julian, it's not like that at all. Actually this has nothing to do with knowing english or not.

The thing is she has many acquantances, and no real friends. And if she feels like doing something perhaps, she'll look toward her family for comfort. and in these particular scenarios, preferrably me. As my dad works full time around the clock.

The thing is she hasnt been working as of late (well her decision). So she has a lot of free time on her hands, and i guess she doesnt want to stay at home.

I've realized she's not as independent as i thought she was. Plus i cant be there for her every time she wants to do something, i have my own life ot live and have responsibilities after all such as work.

 

[Luveno]

Possibilities are:


1. She is hitting menopause. This can do craaazy things to a woman's emotional state.

2. She just doesn't feel loved for some reason. Yeah, this may sound odd, but my grandma sometimes acts the same way.
I suggest that even if you have something else to do or somewhere else to go, give your mom a hug and a kiss before you leave. That will mean the world to her.