getting eat up inside addicted and jealous envy of woman

[limerickdesign]

Im in my late 20's. Decent looking been called good looking by many.


I hang out with so many girls that have options.
Pretty girls and even not so pretty girls who pull guys constantly and consistently, always getting hit up by good looking dudes.
Really fit, really tall, or wealthy and tall and good looking combinations of really good traits and these girls can just go **** around with whomever.

They complain to some extent not being able to find a guy for the long term, but im a guy who
cant even find pretty girls to date or **** without paying for it
or just random stroke of luck. I'm a decent looking dude who has some money but that doesnt mean anything.

I find myself addicted being around such beauty and hearing what they have to say and admiring and picturing myself with that kind of power.
I secretely hate and love my closest friends that are girls
and they mistreat me alot and at times and i envy they can get away with almost anything, get catered to, find guys to **** whenever they are horny, get free **** all the time, get out of tickets and other things and dont have to do much if they dont want to as they have looks and there will always
be some poor sap that caters to them.

I have learned alot about women and i actually so many days and times
visualize myself as a pretty girl, and wish i was a pretty girl.
I'm a sensitive guy who has alot of traits that are girls anyways i might as well be a girl but i dont have the power that they were lucky enough to have by just being born.

It really makes me sick and i justified all this by seeking personal growth through meditation and trying to attain enlightenment and release patterns by trying to get over this hump, but i find myself lonesome as they can get the thrills of life and i have to do slow personal growth through being mostly alone. I dont find guys interesting, and have no desire to hang out with guys.
Its the weirdest thing and i know the relationships with these women is flighty and doesnt really have meaning in the long run as they dont recognize anything other than their personal greed and narcissism.

I'm not sure what im looking for except to find peace and happiness by myself and ive studied alot of esoteric and metaphysical practices
of energy cultivation and stuff like that but it seems being a girl is just far more interesting...

 

[mangotot]

If you are a hot girl, men are going to bend over backwards to accommodate you. But in life they still have to 'work' as in out the hours to ensure they stay good looking, hit the gym and so on. The only thing though is, compared to some men, the opportunities that they get in life is far superior to the ones some men get.

 

[NeverChase]

I think you should figure out the cause of your disinterest in guy friends.
I'm aware of some reasons I suffer from this -
I constantly judge people in my mind.
I don't have a true interest in most of the talks and laughs, I'm too focused on judging\myself\some crap stuck in my mind, and people feel I'm not present, so they also don't respond well to me.
I'm constantly aware of my behavior.
My emotional stress doesn't let my enjoy the moment.

Maybe when you see how great it is to be a guy, and how boring and shallow girls are, you won't be so jealous of them .

 

[YAboi]

Hang out with men

 

[synergy1]

You have managed to buy the whole 'equality' myth between men and women. The fact is men and women are hardly equal. In this regard, the average women hold the cards much more so than men when it comes to dating. As an average male with nothing spectacular going for you ( fame, a lot of money or what have you), the battle will be uphill. Women can simply show up, and get men to accommodate them without question.

Control what aspects of like you can. Obviously if you are attractive from working out , this will help you a lot. However, anyone can do this so its quite the commodity so it is my opinion one needs a much better differentiator to set them aside.

Its a very, very tough pill to swallow. I myself have had to come to terms with this simple fact that I am quite average and must endure this in dating ( especially since its not the city). Women would rather pursue/share a winner, be alone, and maybe use a loser to provide for them in a long term context... in that order if it comes to it. Most men are not "winners", and many women end up settling when its all said and done partially out of self-perceived necessity.

But here is the silver lining. When women live and die by their looks, this makes their advantage ephemeral by nature. Men on the other hand have vast control over their advantage especially if they manage something extraordinary. The exciting thing about this revelation is that it a man's dating ability can be 100% controllable. After a certain point, women can't control their looks as they age. The onus is on you to go out and make something truly amazing of ones self and that might tip the scales.

..but being average and doing what everyone else is doing is a great way to get stuck in the same rut most men are stuck in...