Getting back into the game - 100 approaches journal

[The Artist]

Hello all, this is the first time im posting to these boards, altough I´ve been visiting this site and reading these forums for years now, I´ve never posted anything before! This site has had an impact on me, and as an result I´ve become more confident.

Reading other peoples journals got me inspired to start my own, I really think that this is one of the best ways to aid yourself to get more confident.

Okay, I´ll start by giving you an insight off my current situation. I have had some success with women in the past, and I do mean SOME - not much at all, But in the last few months I´ve seen a drastic drop in the amount of women I´ve been approaching. In the last month´s I´ve been approaching women only in clubs, and have had little success.

As a result I have become less confident, and don´t have balls to even flirt like I used to.



But all that is about to change...

I welcome all criticism and advice, in fact I ask you people to criticise, so I can better my game!

I will start tomorrow, or maby even tonight, if I go out somewhere.
The plan is to get 100 approached, I´ll set me a loose time limit, Don´t want to put too much pressure on myself, and Trying to get 100 approaches done as fast as possible is not important to me, what IS important to me is to take every opportunity I´ll face! I´ll give myself 3 month´s off time to get it over.

P.S english is not my native language, so I hope you forgive me for typos and mistakes in my grammar! I´ll try to see that as little as possible is lost in translation, as I´ll be translating the conversations etc.

 

[satyriasis]

Remember, it's the quality that you put into those approaches.

 

[The Artist]

Ok, this week started off slowly, Not a single approach, yet.
I did go see a movie with this one girl, but she clearly isn´t interested.
I´ve known her for too long and we´re too far in the friendzone.

Why haven´t I made any approaches? well I haven´t really went out enough, for the past three days I´ve just went almost straight to home from work, so from now on I´ll be spending more time in the city after work.

Tomorrow I´ll be going to a club - I hate clubs, haven´t had any luck with them recently, but let´s keep our fingers crossed.

I´ve also planned to go for a cup of coffee with this hb 7.5, I found her from a bar, and she is interested, so I think that it will go just fine.

I´ll keep you updated of how things work out.

 

[The Artist]

Last Night I was at the club... Didn´t quite go as hoped, but It could´ve gone far worse, so Im happy.

I went there becouse a couple of my friends were there - all of them women. One of them introduced me to this hb 7 girl. she was a "nice girl". I also had spotted this other girl, a hb 8,who I had infact had a little something going on with a long time ago, must´ve been something like 6 months ago. When I first saw her I smiled at her, and she smiled back.

Anyway, the girl my friend had introduced me to, was sitting on a sofa at the one corner of the bar. I was walking around with the same friend who had introduced us to each other, and she told me to go and talk to her, but I was having second toughts, because I had the hb 8 in my mind, but I still decided to go for it.

My opening line was awful... "jenny... I mean maria told me to come talk to you. (accidently said the wrong name :crazy: ) "I do believe that" she said.
The rest of the conversation was just horrible by my part too, Long akward pauses and so on, but she was interested, so she was sitting on my lap in no time. At this point I taught things were going just fine, but she was holding back tough, and suddenly she just left :flowers: - After that her friends told me she was interested in some other guy, so that was that.

After that I went walking around the bar, and I spotted the hb 8, she walked right past me, not noticing me, so I tapped her on the shoulder, (at this point I would like to stress out, that tapping a girls shoulder is not a suave way to get a girls attention when starting a conversation, you should walk up to the girl in front of her, and work from there, as it will give a more confident picture of you to the girl - read the bible, it´s all there. Anyway, this really didn´t matter, becouse I did know this girl from before.

So I tapped her shoulder, and smiled to her when she turned around, She said "hi" gave me a hug, a kiss on the cheek, and asked "are you really still interested in me?" I nodded "yes" "I tought you had someone with you?" I shook my head "no" "will you come dance with me later?" "yes", then she gave me another kiss to the cheek, and left. I wondered around for a while, chatted with some friends, and then they played a slow song, so I went looking for the hb8. She spotted me and asked me to dance, and we danced.

from there things went great, we started making out ect ect, UNTIL SUDDENLY, some chump comes along, and off they go...

I had seen the guy before that evening, they clearly had something going on before, so I really didn´t have any other options but to walk off.

At that time it was so close to closing time, that I left. I did have a small conversation with a hb 6.5 as I was making my way out, could´ve asked for a number, but decided not to, wasn´t interested.

So, at the end of the night I had 1 approach under my belt :yes: , only 99 to go :yes:

Evaluation:

1. The conversation with the first girl was horrible, everything about the approach was just plain horrible, I was distracted with the other girl

Lesson learned: Concentrate 100% percent to the girl you are approaching/having a conversation with.

2. I didn´t approach women enough

lesson learned: Approach more girls to gain more approaches under your belt

In the future I will put more effort Into writing these raports, I understand that I did not write detailed enough this time

 

[The Artist]

I had a date with this hb7.5 yesterday. The date started fine, I kept the conversation going quite well I think. At one point I took her hand into mine.
She asked "what do you think you are doing?" In a playful tone. At this point I came to the conclusion, that I could continue holding her hand, becouse she didn´t pull her hand away.

She did make quite a few of phonecalls during the date, trying to make plans for the evening. She called her friends trying to get somebody go to the movies with her, but had no success. Finally I offered to go with her, but she changed her mind, deciding to go to a club instead, telling me that this was the only night she could see her friends - quite an abrupt change of mind I´d say.

After we left the coffee place I offered to walk her home, and she accepted. During the walk at one point I tried taking her hand in mine, but to that she said that It was making her feel uncomfortable.

Evaluation:

I came off too aggressive. Didn´t read her bodylanguage, or take her words seriously enough. I wasn´t being a challenge, even think I could have come off as desperate!

lesson learned: THE BRAKES! jeesus christ push the brakes WE´RE GOING TO CRASH, we´re all going to die NOOOOOOoOoOOo! <<<<KABOOM>>>>

also the hickie in my neck from the night before might have had a part...

Next Im going to go and read more of the bible, seems like I haven´t learned the lessons at all

 

[drumerdud]

the funny thing is,,,all these things...are simple to understand..all the techniques mindset. etc. What many of us fail to do, including me, is to actually DO and FOLLO these techniques outside. Especially witha HB, i tend to blank out on eveyrthing i learned from here. So again, picture them with a beard and beer belly, that should do the trick. Additionally, i like to read the bible every night before i sleep, just skim through it. Eveyrtime i read it, theres always something i missed which in turn willl help me in the future

 

[Tomatoes]

Hey Artist. I have read threw your posts and it seems you are making an effort to sort things out. USeful pointers you shud take in mind.

1. You said you were going to a club to cold appoarch? You then say in the next line that you dont like clubs... Now cold approaching makes you feel a little nervous and uneasy as it is. Doing it in a surronding your not comfortable in is just going to make it harder. If your going to cold approach. Do it where you feel comfortable. Where you can relax. I cant stand pulling in clubs...so i dont try. A quiet bar or pub is much more comfortable for myself and my success rate is alot higher.

2. As satyriasis said in the second post. Make sure you approach girls you are intrested in. What is the point in approaching a girl that you see no intrest in? There is no motovation to succeed making the whole process pointless and a waste of time. You can spend half an hour gaming a girl you dont accaully want to do anything with. She gives you her number but you wont ring it because you were never intrested....what has that half an hour achived? Yeah you got a number close. But it wasnt one you wanted so it doesnt matter. Pending on the totty about i would usually go for 5 approaches in a pub/bar. Sometimes i may go for only 1. Others 10. Depends what calibre is about. You need to go after girls you see intrest in thow.

3. You went to hold that girls hand. I want you to ask yourself. What were you thinking at the time? Were you thinking "heh this is a good game move for some kino"? She turned round and then said "what do you think your doing?". I personally wouldnt go for holding hands on a date. (esp first date.) Its so cliche and corny. Girls dont fall for it. Unless you do shezz's little palm stroaking move. I tried that the other night and it got the girl i was with horny as hell. Now. Every action has a reaction. If you are going to do something like "Hold her hand". You know she is going to react in some way. Be it positive or negative. You want to have a C+F repsonse ready really. Staying quiet makes you look boring when she comes out with a line.

 

[The Artist]

Thanks for the replies guys, I´ll definetly take your advice. I really don´t have that much experience on dates, so I´ll propably continue messing up in the future, but I feel confident that things will work out for the better.

"I hate clubs" was perhaps a bit exaggarated, In the recent times I have had little success there, But still I do go to clubs because there are lots of opportunities there, I do believe that In the end of the day it all comes down to my personal performance, mind state and wheter I got the guts to approach cold - It´s not the clubs that suck, it´s me

so guess what! I was at a club last night, for a change... Did a couple of doomed from the start approaches on groups of girls with a friend. I won´t even count them approaches, they were that bad. on top of those I did do one good approach. I saw this hb7 sitting on a sofa alone, as soon as I approached.

I started by asking why she was sitting alone there, can´t remember how the rest went, but she blew me off becouse she was a bit older than me. (The age difference wasn´t huge perhaps something like 5 years, but comparing to me, she lived in a whole different world.)

altought it didn´t go as I hoped it would, I don´t feel bad, it´s not like it was my loss

 

[DJsparky]

Never give up, you will learn from your mistakes and you are trying and thats the main thing. Remember women are wierd creatures mixed with all emotions, there looking for guys that are different in aproaching, be original,fun, use kino and tease, you cant go wrong and at the end of the day all this will pay off

Good luck

 

[The Artist]

Nothing... Just read the featured tip of the day "Changing Your Routine" by DJ de Florida, and it get´s right into the point - It tells you to change your daily roitune in a fashion that you will bump into more women, exactly what i´ve been doing wrong, I´ve been going home straight from work lately.

Another thing is procrastination. Im always making up excuses not to hang out in the city... Be it bad weather or whatever.

Last night I was at a club... MAN did it suck

Ayway I did approach this one hb8. She was at a table, clearly alone. I went up to her (should´ve first made eye contact, and smile) And grabbed her attention by saying "Hi" (with a smile of course)
She: Hi
Me: you alone here?
She: yes
Me: Why so?
She: Just came to have a cup of coffee
Me: ok, that´s cool.
Akward pause...
Me: So... What do you do? are you in school or do you work?
She: I work at a restaurant
Me: aren´t the work hours a bit tough?
She: well, not for me, maybe for some
Me: So it kinda depends on the person?
She: yeah...
Akward pause...
Me: Imma gonna go check on my friends, you have a nice night.



Sad, sad, just so sad... BUT IT COUNTS MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH
btw, keep in mind that was translated, It didn´t sound that crappy In reality, But I do think that I captured the true essence of the conversation, which btw was "crappy", into that translation...

Well... Even the best lose sometimes, that must mean Im the best-EST! :rockon:

Over and out.

 

[ShyRyder]

Good job cold approaching im doing a cold approach journal also. Make sure your being positive right after you do you approaches. Take the good things like the fact that you approached and pat yourself on the back.

After
She: Just came to have a cup of coffee

Maybe you could said something like

“Yah I love to take a break out of my day and relax, how often do you come here”

Anyway don’t take my word for it I’m no expert. Good job approaching keep it up

 

[ntssv]

Ayway I did approach this one hb8. She was at a table, clearly alone. I went up to her (should´ve first made eye contact, and smile) And grabbed her attention by saying "Hi" (with a smile of course)
She: Hi
Me: you alone here?
She: yes
Me: Why so?
She: Just came to have a cup of coffee
Me: ok, that´s cool.
Akward pause...
Me: So... What do you do? are you in school or do you work?
She: I work at a restaurant
Me: aren´t the work hours a bit tough?
She: well, not for me, maybe for some
Me: So it kinda depends on the person?
She: yeah...
Akward pause...
Me: Imma gonna go check on my friends, you have a nice night.

This sounds exactly as my convo's... Being quick witted and charming can be a pain in the A$$ for someone like me. Reserved, toooooooo laid back!

Your doing good though! Getting out there throwing some balls around!!!

 

[Blackdragon5095]

Yay more people doing Field reports. Just ketp praticing. Remember 75% of communtion is body language. Also you gonna show you gonna show your listening. Read the DJ bible and get out their. The Field is the best teacher you can ever get !!!!!! :yes: