"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Getting a job and phone interviews

bob2007

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I hate these ****en phone interviews. I've had like 4 and not gotten the real interview once. One of them is pending however.

I felt that I wasn't excited enough on the phone and I didn't know whether to speak louder or softer cause I donno how the reception is on the other end. I felt like I was answering a survey, and didn't have the time or preparation to elaborate on the questions.

Anyways, here's the situation, as I said above, I probably didn't come off as great as I would have liked, especially since the position requires speaking on the phone. The position would require me to place stock trades for clients and do some research for their magazine. I have since looked at their website and think its a great position for me and the same type of growth research I've done in the past.

The woman gave me her number to call her in case I wanted to know about the status of call backs - she has said that it'll happen next week. Should I use this opportunity to dispel her concerns about my lack of customer service experience by calling her back and showing some enthusiasm? Or, would you all think that's a little desperate.

BTW I am very desperate for a job, its been 6 months since graduation. I had day trading stock trading job (pure commission) where I made no money, just all the profits charged to expenses.
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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bob2007 said:
...Should I use this opportunity to dispel her concerns about my lack of customer service experience by calling her back and showing some enthusiasm? Or, would you all think that's a little desperate.
Right now what's more important, securing your pride or securing a job?
 

bob2007

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Right now what's more important, securing your pride or securing a job?
I hear ya, but what I was thinking was not so much my pride, but whether the recruiter would see it as desperate. Or... would she see it as geniune interest? I am leaning on the latter.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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As long as you don't beg or try to bribe her you should be alright following up.
 
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ExploringOne

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Call in and ask. Just be very non-chalant about it. Get the point across that you're interested, but not desperate.

Last thing some HR recruiter lackie wants to do is hire a desperate person. If they perceive that you're desperate, then in their eyes you have no value.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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