get to know with people

[lafual]

I've just started at a new school.. where everyone dont know eachother.. so i have a problem, the problem is how to get to know with people.. (girls/boys)
i know some few people, i started to talk with them at the second day at school, told about myself and they told about them self, what i did, where i live.. but after that i was just stuck.. i didnt know what other question i could ask them about them..

and plz dont say read the conversation posts FFS!!!!, i have readed, and yes i have listen carefully!.. i can get the girl i want,, so i DONT NEED TO READ THE BIBLE, cuz I HAVE readed the bibel.. and it have changed my life.. buti just suck at questions.. to get know with people, what to ask.. its easy to lead the conversation.. but its just that i SUCK to know people,, questions..

so what kind of question can i ask them to get more ehm known with people, with boys and girls..


kthxbye!

 

[Soapz]

so what kind of question can i ask them to get more ehm known with people, with boys and girls..

What do YOU want to know about them?

These are people you've never met before! Where the heck are they from? What did they do there? How was their lifestyle there? Are they pot-heads? Whats their view on homosexuality?

You really just need to take a genuine interest in others. Once you do, the possibilities are endless.

 

[Patrick124]

study comedy, listen/watch comedians[that you find funny] and this willput you in a comedic mood, which will hlep you to make friends.
discuss things like waht you're doing this next weekend, get some peoples #s[both guys n girls] and during lunch n ****, find the chill guys who you want ot cihll with n either ask em to eat with you, or eat with them. create a crew.
iuno man. thats what I would do.

 

[lafual]

What do YOU want to know about them?

These are people you've never met before! Where the heck are they from? What did they do there? How was their lifestyle there? Are they pot-heads? Whats their view on homosexuality?

You really just need to take a genuine interest in others. Once you do, the possibilities are endless.

I want to know them better,, I have asked them, "what they like, where they come from, why are you here, what are they intrest in" and bang i have runned out of question.. and im stuck! yes i listen, and if he say "i like to play fotball" and then i ask them bunch of fotball-question.. and if they like basketball i ask them bunch of basketball-question.. bbut when im run out of question.. im stuck, then what kind of other question can i ask them then, its EASY to lead the conversation as i said.. but to get knownthem its hard,
IM SUCK at question... all i say is "What do you like, what do you do.. osv---" as i said.. so what kind of OTHER question can i tell them

and for Patrick124, you mention about "what youre doing this next weeked" its kinda ehm weird, i feel i have to know them b4 i can ask that question..
i found some chillpeople, and started as i always do.. "hi, name here.. so.." im stuck

sry for my english..

and

 

[Soapz]

Ah, I see.

Well, I'm not usually one to give SPECIFIC advice, cuz I believe more in the power of the mindset and overall vibe.

But it sounds like your itching for more concrete stuff stuff so here goes...

First thing- you're asking "close ended" questions.

Where do you come from? What do you like? What are you doing next weekend?

They all require simple one word answers. (e.g. Canada, Football, Church). Try asking something more open ended like "How do you feel about this school?" or "That girl over there- what would you give to bang her?"

See? Those questions require longer answers and have slightly more depth to them.

Secondly, it ain't all about asking questions. You gotta put something into the interaction as well. Tell stories, say where YOU'RE from, what you like, etc. You have to relate to people. Talk about your emotions and how you feel about things- thats always easy.

And thirdly, and probably most importantly, have fun! Don't feel like you have to talk about "normal" stuff. Talk about anything! Ask a girl "Do you think you can beat up that girl over there?" Or talk about your childhood experiences with Pokemon. Whatever! Just enjoy yourself and you'll find yourself connecting with others much more easily. Don't think "I gotta make this person my best friend," or "What should I say next?!?!?"

The mindset you should have is more akin to "This person looks interesting. Lets see if we can have some fun together!"

G'luck, and don't hesitate to ask if you want more clarification!

Oh, and I would highly recommend you check out Juggler material. Go here and sign up for the forum: http://www.setbb.com/charisma/

His stuff is ALL about conversation and connecting with people. You may find it useful.

 

[lafual]

thgxthx

you mentiont "http://www.setbb.com/charisma/".. ehm didint find so good threads in tghere.. if im wrong.. can you give me a dir.link?


anyway do any other know somme good tip? or readstuff?

 

[Soapz]

Hey, sorry I wasn't more specific about the Juggler method stuff. Anyways, search for this post on the forum: "unsolicited review of phone coaching with Dan of CA" and download the little file in it. It's a pretty nice summary of the Juggler Method.

Another good site is http://socialhitchhiker.blogspot.com/

I'd recommend you check out these posts:

• Rewarding
• Genuine Interest
• Crash Course in Relating
• Equal Interaction Exchange Revisited
• Connect - Relate - Reward

All good stuff. And remember to go out there and start talking!