"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Get her to want you.

onlysmiles

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i met this girl at daytona beach on springbreak, hung out with her once and everything went well. Now that SB is over i wont see her unless we work something out, she lives in a whole nother state but only 4hrs away. we been texting eachother ever since we got home (two texting convos), saying how much we like eachother, sending pictures, ect. and i've initiated the convos. so i decided not to talk to her until she initiated the next one so i can see how interested she is, but its been about 5 days and still nothing. Another thing is she has two friends i can talk to.. i could talk to one of them to get her jealous?? but what opinion would say i do, should i move on, call her, or keep hope?


I also know its hard to maintain or force a relationship so far away, but how do you keep someone on they're toes so far away to see you/want you??


:crazy: :crazy: :crazy: :crazy: :crazy: :crazy: :crazy:


Thanks all for your advice.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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sosilky

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onlysmiles said:
I also know its hard to maintain or force a relationship so far away, but how do you keep someone on they're toes so far away to see you/want you??
listen bud you got to understand something, as romantic as your story sounds, you guys were on a Spring Break, which aside from Las Vegas is the ultimate BREAK FROM REALITY. Now you guys are back to reality and your lives. She's 4 hours away, you guys have probably spent about three days together and your trying to set up long distance jealousy traps. I think she probably likes you too but actions speak louder then words and she is back to her life now. facebook her or whatever and maybe see her down the road, but on a scale of 0-100 you should put a ratio of 1% effort into this. Anymore then that and she'll probably think your desperate and don't have a life of your own. i dated a girl I met on a wild trip that lived states away from me but she showed an equal amount of interest in me as far as comunication goes and it began to build to me going out to see her. Do not put anymore into this then she is. Wait a minute i just noticed you only hung out with her once on that trip......bro...relax
 

DonJuan11

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onlysmiles said:
she lives in a whole nother state but only 4hrs away. we been texting eachother ever since we got home (two texting convos), saying how much we like eachother, sending pictures, ect. and i've initiated the convos. so i decided not to talk to her until she initiated the next one so i can see how interested she is, but its been about 5 days and still nothing. Another thing is she has two friends i can talk to.. i could talk to one of them to get her jealous??

Thanks all for your advice.

Talk to her friend if you want to talk to her, but don't talk to her to make her jealous. If you do that, you are playing into her hand. What happens if she doesn't talk to you for 10 days instead of 5? Are you then going to sleep with her friend to make her jealous ?

---------------------------------------

Baby if you give it me, I'll give it to you.
 

onlysmiles

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haha no i dont plan on sleeping with her friend. it just seems if i talk to her friend regardless if im trying to make her jealous or not, she would get jealous anyway, ya know? but one thing i forgot to metion is that her n her friends plan on coming up during the summer if that means anything

i just realized that this whole thing is useless and stupid, but i cant stop thinking bout her.. im goin crazy. really.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Faded Image

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sosilky said:
listen bud you got to understand something, as romantic as your story sounds, you guys were on a Spring Break, which aside from Las Vegas is the ultimate BREAK FROM REALITY. Now you guys are back to reality and your lives. She's 4 hours away, you guys have probably spent about three days together and your trying to set up long distance jealousy traps. I think she probably likes you too but actions speak louder then words and she is back to her life now. facebook her or whatever and maybe see her down the road, but on a scale of 0-100 you should put a ratio of 1% effort into this. Anymore then that and she'll probably think your desperate and don't have a life of your own. i dated a girl I met on a wild trip that lived states away from me but she showed an equal amount of interest in me as far as comunication goes and it began to build to me going out to see her. Do not put anymore into this then she is. Wait a minute i just noticed you only hung out with her once on that trip......bro...relax
Sosilky, I must say that you've learned a lot since you've been here, good advice.
 

sosilky

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Faded Image said:
Sosilky, I must say that you've learned a lot since you've been here, good advice.
well this situation isn't new to me, knew how to handle this situation before coming here, yet i have picked up some knowledge from here. don't listen to don juan11 smiles he obviously doesn't understand the situation. Just follow my advice and if she comes up this summer if its meant to be it will be. If you put all your energy into this ...She wont want to see you when she comes
 

onlysmiles

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7th day she texted me and we chated for a bit :)
but one question. all we've been doing as far as communication wise is, texting. I was thinking to call her in a couple days since i dont want to just text all the time, good idea?

thanks.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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