"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Gentleman, I have won the battle of No Contact!

Wasabi_Master

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I just wanted to let you know that NC does work. I had no contact with my ex for a few years and have received a friend invite on FB. I will not accept the request because that is not what NC teaches us, it helps us move on and that is exactly what I did but DAMN does it put a smile on my face.:cheer:
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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JohnChops

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Wasabi_Master said:
I just wanted to let you know that NC does work. I had no contact with my ex for a few years and have received a friend invite on FB. I will not accept the request because that is not what NC teaches us, it helps us move on and that is exactly what I did but DAMN does it put a smile on my face.:cheer:
Five years? Dedication right there. People.can't even make.it a week without crying . Glad your life is right side up
 

Wasabi_Master

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i think over 3 years. I recommend for any guys looking for NC advice is to read every thread made by Pook. he also references other DJ's so you will learn a lot. Also make no mistake, going NC is not about hoping to get back together again, its about making life changes to not be a "nice guy". Again read Pook's book, its here somewhere.
 

bigneil

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The idea is to get her back to having high interest. NC is an essential tool toward that end, but don't lose sight of the goal. Getting in shape is equally important and probably more effective. There are some people who say that it doesn't matter if she has high interest now if you broke NC, which is absurd. The only exception to every rule is there's an exception to every rule.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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foreverAFC

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if you had to wait several years just to get some satisfaction, then i dont really think you really won at all
 

JohnChops

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Danger said:
NC is not about returning her interest level.

NC is about moving on with your life and finding better prospects.


If one used NC for raising interest level, then it is little more than a rationalization for taking back a woman who decided to go out and h0r around for a few more years before returning and committing to you.

Accepting this is tantamount to saying "I'll pay full price for you even if a bunch of other drivers come along and use you for five years, that is how desperate I am for you".

Was just about to post the same thing . Why would you ever NC a girl then take her back? Its counter productive of the real meaning of NC . You NCd her for a reason, did you forget the reason?
 

Renegade357

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Actually he does make a good point. NC can get you another genuine shot at a girl 2-3 years down the line. I've had it happen several times. Everytime they come back it's only after I've truely lost my feelings and no longer want them. Just happened to me about a month ago actually. Super cute girl. We dated for a few months, she gives me the distance routine trying to play mind games ect, I went NC. Butt hurt for about 6 months then got over her. Fast forward 2 years she comes back around trying to get me to ask her out again but then I remembered how insane she is.
 

st_99

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Renegade357 said:
Everytime they come back it's only after I've truely lost my feelings and no longer want them.
isnt if funny how that happens? Whether you TRULY lose all feelings for them in 1, 3 or 6 years. THAT is when they will contact you. LOL. Its so absurd, its funny, all of this nonsense.
 

Renegade357

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st_99 said:
isnt if funny how that happens? Whether you TRULY lose all feelings for them in 1, 3 or 6 years. THAT is when they will contact you. LOL. Its so absurd, its funny, all of this nonsense.
Haha yes, it is totally absurd. I treated this girl pretty well too. Wasn't COMPLETELY AFC with her or anything. Regardless, with all the cases they always know when you really TRULY forget them. Demonic little creatures they are!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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bigneil

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JohnChops said:
Why would you ever NC a girl then take her back?
Because you got in shape and you know she'll react to you. Then you can start over and dump her the next time she acts up, and she'll be chasing you.

You still need to go 60 days though.
 

JohnChops

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bigneil said:
Because you got in shape and you know she'll react to you. Then you can start over and dump her the next time she acts up, and she'll be chasing you.

You still need to go 60 days though.
I thought about doing that exact thing to my oneitis however in her.eyes your the same, first.impressions last forever as they say . In her mind , muscles or not, in her mine your still the emotional chump who poured your feelings out on her. Plus why bother improving yourself to get her back and then dump her.....that means you spent all that time improving for HER, not yourself...... a little to much emphasis on the her .

Edit - my phone is retarded, fixed the spelling
 
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Wasabi_Master

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if you were shopping in a mall and saw your ex that you haven't seen in a while gain 200 lbs, wouldn't that put a smile on your face? same thing when they try to get back in touch, I've moved on and will not get back with her but i did get the gratification on some level that she is crawling back, that's all.
 

MikeOck

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With 3.5 Billion+ women on this planet, it is always best to let an ex remain an ex. It isn't even worth the time to get them back just to screw them over. Just move on and let the past stay where it is.

However, it does feel good when some time passes and they come chasing. Usually I just ignore it, occasionally I'll give a "Thanks, but no thanks".
 

JohnChops

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MikeOck said:
With 3.5 Billion+ women on this planet, it is always best to let an ex remain an ex. It isn't even worth the time to get them back just to screw them over. Just move on and let the past stay where it is.

However, it does feel good when some time passes and they come chasing. Usually I just ignore it, occasionally I'll give a "Thanks, but no thanks".

mhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm thats my point exactly.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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