Game? What game?

[Trance_69]

I'm new to So Suave and with the help of this and other websites like this I will learn and become a DJ.

I was a major wuss (AFC?) and had limited success with women, then I decided to get this part of my life sorted and master this new skill.
At first I didn't even know I was playing a game let alone what the rules were. It was like playing a video game set on the hardest difficulty setting and with no instructions.
Then my bro introduced me to Dave D and this website and thank f**k he did or I would still be lost in the wilderness.
I'm trying to incorporate this stuff into my personality and improve my inner game.
I guess it's like learning any new skill, like learning to drive or mastering a martial art (I've done both), easy to learn the theory and basics but takes years to master.

I have 2 questions, how many years has it taken you master DJs to learn this stuff so that it becomes natural and part of your personality?
And
What good openers do you guys use?
I find the hardest part is the initial meeting, breaking the ice. Once I get into a conversation I'm fine.

 

[mcs]

1. depends on a guy. what's your past and things like this
2. forget about openers, look more around here

from your questions i suggest you to do a search on "inner game"

 

[schttrj]

hi trance, welcome to the site first of all (a bear hug)!

well, we all were unaware of what we were doing, whether we were a player or not. i believe so. the thing is that, dont think you are left behind. you are on your way to being the flame and make sure you dont stop till your death.

i am not going to teach you anything here. just keep at it and remember giving up is not an option until u become the casanova of the 21st century!

to be honest, you never stop learning and i think i am still a student. i dont approach like a crazy person but ya, i do approach regularly and this has gotten me into the state where previously my body and inner noise would prevent me from doing it, but now i just like to do it. you know, taking your chances! you feel an inner power. but still now, there are so many factors and nitty-gritties you have to take care that you can only strive to become better than others, never the best. just keep in mind, you are going to be outgamed at tiems, but after all, this is a GAME, so enjoy yourself.

openers - girls are different n you can never be sure which one will work. but my advice or what i follow:

if at all you don't have a choice, go for a direct approach. but then again, i'd suggest, you only say a "hi" (a compliance test), n you take it from there. but if you have a reason to talk with her or you can start talking with your target very subtly like it is just happening, then you are going for a very strong game. no more ranting from me! get out in the field and figure out yourself, thats whta the experts told me when i was a newbie! remember, two ways you can open a girl... 1)you have interest in her 2) you don't have any interest in her, she is just like anybody else. #2 calls for strong skills and it ensues with a strong game and works better than #1.

thats it. keep at it, bud!

 

[Trance_69]

Hi schttrj, thanks for your reply.
I know it was silly of me to ask what time span it takes to master all this stuff as there is a lot to master and each person will learn at a different pace.
I have also heard the best and easiest opener is simply saying "Hi".
When I first started learning this stuff it did build up my confidence (I was like a kid with a new toy) and I would just go up to the hottest girl in any place and try to chat her up but would usualy crash and burn. I think this is due to cramming to much information in my brain and when I need to use it I go blank.
Now I'm learning to slow down, see what girl notices me first, make eye contact etc and then approach.
At the end of the day I guess it is all down to practice, practice and more practice and seeing what works and doesn't work for me.

 

[schttrj]

well trance, i have something to say here: DON'T EVER WAIT FOR A GIRL'S SIGNALS. she may give it or she may not, you may be able to read it or you may be not. just follow one motto: unless and until she is showing disinterest, persist and don't eject. Of course, you have a limit, if she crosses taht, next her.

can't say if "hi" is the best opener since it is sort of direct opener and it needs you to show a lot of value in the first impression itself. you don't have time if you are going to use it on the hotties, ya know. but sure it can be used anywhere. higher risk/higher reward opener! still field test it. see if it works well for you.

 

[redspicyflag]

1) You always keep learning. It really depends on how you are before, but it took me a couple years to integrate everything. I'm still doing it/\.

2) Not what you say, but how you say it. Just have the right mindset. Calibrate!