"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Frustrated.

Industry

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I just don't get it guys. What the fvck is wrong with me? I haven't had a "real" girlfriend in almost 3 years. 3 fvcking years! Now, I've dated tons of women since then but none seem to want to be exclusive with me. I get laid, I get dates, I get flirted with... no problem. But I can't ever get to the next level with a girl it seems.

I just turned 27, I'm a good looking guy, 6'0 175 lbs, I work out, surf, fly airplanes, I'm a regional sales manager for a finance company here in Cali, own a house, a nice car, have a great close family. I think my life is pretty awesome except for the fact that I have no girl to share it with.

Maybe I'm too nice? Maybe I'm not the bad boy every girl wants? I have no fvcking idea. I'm just me and I think that's good enough... but for some reason no one else seems to think so.

What do I need to do? I have no problem talking to girls, I'm confident, and easy to get along with. What am I missing? Do I need an edge of some sort?

I'm confused... give me some input boys.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Interceptor

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Maybe you're considered "too nice"? Or too "perfect"?
Maybe you don't have an "edge" to you? Maybe you look at women in an idealized image of them?

How do you bring up LTR issues?
Do they bring it up to you?

What happens in these situations?

More info please.
 

Industry

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Interceptor said:
Maybe you're considered "too nice"? Or too "perfect"?
Maybe you don't have an "edge" to you? Maybe you look at women in an idealized image of them?

How do you bring up LTR issues?
Do they bring it up to you?

What happens in these situations?

More info please.
I don't think of myself as a "nice guy" but I am a good person. I don't take **** from anyone and I've got no problem telling you what's on my mind. The girl I was just dating would call me a jerk. She did sh1t that pissed me off and I wasn't shy about telling her.

I don't think I'm perfect... but I do like my life and have the freedom to do as I please. I thought most girls were attracted to that?

I think I have an edge to me... I'm a thrill seeker... I fly planes, I skydive, scuba dive with sharks, and I'm somewhat unpredictable. Sometimes I think that I look too young (not masculine enough) for girls to take me serious. but I don't know.

What do you mean by "idealized image of women"?

Usually when the issue gets brought up of being exclusive, all that gets said is "I'm not ready for that yet... " Over and over again. The last girl I was ready to take that road with said it to me for 4 months and after 4 months I pretty much said we have to be exclusive or end things for good. Well, they ended.

I'm just sick of dating, I have no time to play the field like I used to and I want to figure out what the hell is wrong with me when it comes to dating.

Here's my myspace if that can help shed any light on the situation... http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=2453361
 

On Point

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Nothing wrong with you man, but you're probably making some mistake in the way you're interacting with women, or your inner game isn't genuine.

The good news is you're here and these guys can help you. Like Industry says, post some examples of how it goes.

Also read Senor Fingers e-book and see if that turns on any light bulbs for you.

Industry said:
What do I need to do? I have no problem talking to girls, I'm confident, and easy to get along with. What am I missing? Do I need an edge of some sort?

I'm confused... give me some input boys.
 

Industry

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On Point said:
Nothing wrong with you man, but you're probably making some mistake in the way you're interacting with women, or your inner game isn't genuine.

The good news is you're here and these guys can help you. Like Industry says, post some examples of how it goes.

Also read Senor Fingers e-book and see if that turns on any light bulbs for you.
My inner game? uhhh? Im pretty sure it is... i dont know?


Where can I find the e-book?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

violator

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I havent had a girlfriend for over two years, not because none of them want to be exclusive but because I haven't found a worthy mate yet.

But getting back to the subject. Is it possible since you are so intent on having an exclusive relationship that you are subconsciously, creating a needy vibe that scares them off?

If i were you I would just relax and let things flow naturally. If you have that easy come easy go attitude you will be more of a challenge to women and they will be the ones raising the exclusivity question.
 

On Point

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Man, it took forever to find where I downloaded it. Here you go:

http://www.jbspencer.com/djb/

Sorry, inner game is jargon from some of the articles here. If you read WMS and the Book of Pook they cover all that stuff. If you read those and still don't know where you're going wrong I'd be surprised.

Industry said:
My inner game? uhhh? Im pretty sure it is... i dont know?


Where can I find the e-book?
 

Industry

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I've read a few of those before but I'll check this out. It looks pretty good. Thanks man!
 

Janez

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maybe you just don't make good sex with women u sleep with??

if u **** them good they will want you more than just a few times
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

CF9

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You're probably sending out a vibe of desperation...that's synonymous w/ weakness, and weakness is unmanly.. That's my guess. Just remember that your self-worth is NOT tied to being w/ a woman; it's about what kind of man you are. Ultimately, your confidence will shine through. Probably not what you wanna hear, but you'll find your woman when you aren't looking for her...
 
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