"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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From target to girlfriend.

nvictor

Senior Don Juan
Joined
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DJs,

Just established her as my GF yesterday. I'm
totally aware of not becoming an AFC. Past
experiences have taught me a lot.

I'm making modifications to DJs' rules.

You are who you are around with. I wouldn't like
to be the one that goes out with a *****. For
that, I won't allow others treat her like a *****.
If both of us can't respect that, I'll stop the rela
tionship.

I demand her, respect to my time, my goals. And
I judge her only on the way she treats me. But
somewhere, I must protect her, from jerks.

So what do you think of that?

Opinions wanted. Thanks.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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resilient

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2005
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You're on the right track. :up:

One note on protecting her from jerks. You really can't make the decisions for her to wanting to be with someone else. If you guys have the exclusivity talk (hopefully brought up by her) than you've got a pact of trust until broken or proven otherwise.

What you can do however is be your best self and someone that she'd always look forward to being around. Doing things right will keep her attracted. You can correct AFC behavior, but don't think DJs are spotless, we're human - we make mistakes as well, just not as many as AFCs. ;)

Life is a long learning process of making decisions and taking risks. If things don't work out in the end than that's ok because you learned something about what you're looking for long term and more about how you handle your strength and weaknesses in relationhips.
 
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