I realized it full bore yesterday, but I have known it for a while now. Whenever I talk to a new girl i can't escalate the conversation towards a sexual nature. I keep them interested, but it's along the lines of where they're from, what they do....... blah blah blah....nothing about what I care about......trying to get in her pants. I don't know how to say or do things to let t hem know I want to be more than a "girlfriend". I know it's been discussed a million times, so if someone can post a good link I would appreciate it. Thanks.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
From fluff talk to fvck talk......
- Thread starter Drewskie
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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Be playful with it. For example, don't ask her where she's from. Try to guess where she's from. Whenever she asks you a question, don't answer directly. Turn it into a game (e.g. "Where would you guess I'm from?"). Basically, immediately pretend as though you know her. Make a few assumptions about her and joke about it. You're just all about having fun.
You can easily relate it to the way you joke around with your close guy friends. You probably love to make fun of each other, act stupid and just make each other laugh.....you know, all that male bonding stuff. I'd bet that comes quite naturally to you as it does to most guys.
Of course, you'll want to avoid the potty humor, the obnoxious noises and foul language when you're talking to girls.
You can easily relate it to the way you joke around with your close guy friends. You probably love to make fun of each other, act stupid and just make each other laugh.....you know, all that male bonding stuff. I'd bet that comes quite naturally to you as it does to most guys.
Of course, you'll want to avoid the potty humor, the obnoxious noises and foul language when you're talking to girls.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
ok this may sound wierd.
but i was talking to this HB8.7 once a couple of months ago
first night i met her.
she looked indian but had solid developed legs and calf muscles in her short office skirt.
so half way through the convo, instead of asking where she's from i said.
ok let me guess where you're from..
she goes ok..
so i looked her up and down, giving her the obvious checking out look.
and she laughed and said "my face is here though"
so i replied with "yeh but you can tell alot by the persons body shape you know"
she was like "ok where am i from then, since you've looked me up and down carefully"
me: well you're skin color is pretty smooth and tanned, so you're probably from a country where they have tanned people.
you have natural flowy silky hair, looks like the type of hair from an asian country.
but...ive been CHECKING OUT YOUR LEGS and CALVES and i dont think indians have those kind of calves..or legs going up..yours are pretty well defined..
so either you're an indian that is very health concious or you're a south american with an indian face..either way i like it..
she just laughed hysterically and blushed..
and said yes im indian, and i work out alot.
i then switched to talking about how our skin tons are not that far apart.
and asked her to put her hand on my hand..to compare colors.
then i put my hand on her thigh to compare skin color diff..
and said something like "so im sure yo daddy wont mind you seeing a black guy whose not THAT much darker than you right?"
had her laughing she said "no i could lie to my folks
"
she got the hint..
anyway i think the hand on the thigh thing worked good coz i just left my hand there for the rest of the convo..took her out and said...
so we've compared parts of our body..except the most important bits..
she "what part is that?"
me "lips...ofcourse! nawty! what did you think? i saw that naughtiness in your eyes girl!"
she just laughed like.."i wasnt being naughty!!..hahahah..lips huh?"
me" yeh come closer, lets put it together and see how diff they are and.."
she leaned in and kissed me before i could continue the sentence..
ended up back at her place and fclose.
hope that helps.
that was one of the most randomest pick ups..and since then ive used that ALOT
but i was talking to this HB8.7 once a couple of months ago
first night i met her.
she looked indian but had solid developed legs and calf muscles in her short office skirt.
so half way through the convo, instead of asking where she's from i said.
ok let me guess where you're from..
she goes ok..
so i looked her up and down, giving her the obvious checking out look.
and she laughed and said "my face is here though"
so i replied with "yeh but you can tell alot by the persons body shape you know"
she was like "ok where am i from then, since you've looked me up and down carefully"
me: well you're skin color is pretty smooth and tanned, so you're probably from a country where they have tanned people.
you have natural flowy silky hair, looks like the type of hair from an asian country.
but...ive been CHECKING OUT YOUR LEGS and CALVES and i dont think indians have those kind of calves..or legs going up..yours are pretty well defined..
so either you're an indian that is very health concious or you're a south american with an indian face..either way i like it..
she just laughed hysterically and blushed..
and said yes im indian, and i work out alot.
i then switched to talking about how our skin tons are not that far apart.
and asked her to put her hand on my hand..to compare colors.
then i put my hand on her thigh to compare skin color diff..
and said something like "so im sure yo daddy wont mind you seeing a black guy whose not THAT much darker than you right?"
had her laughing she said "no i could lie to my folks
"she got the hint..
anyway i think the hand on the thigh thing worked good coz i just left my hand there for the rest of the convo..took her out and said...
so we've compared parts of our body..except the most important bits..
she "what part is that?"
me "lips...ofcourse! nawty! what did you think? i saw that naughtiness in your eyes girl!"
she just laughed like.."i wasnt being naughty!!..hahahah..lips huh?"
me" yeh come closer, lets put it together and see how diff they are and.."
she leaned in and kissed me before i could continue the sentence..
ended up back at her place and fclose.
hope that helps.
that was one of the most randomest pick ups..and since then ive used that ALOT
tsmith2334
Master Don Juan
I rarely post here but I had to make a comeback for this one. Whatever you do, don't follow that advice ^Wolf said:2) If you are chatting online, send her a link to www.meatspin.com
Depending on what sort of reaction you get you may be able to joke around that she secretly holds the world record for sitting through the most spins, whatever. You know, then you can just continue, gradually building up...
How old are you Wolf, 16? The last thing any self-respecting guy would want to do is to send a potential hook-up to such a foul website. Sure, it may lead to a sexually charged conversation, but 99 times out of 100 you'll probably never hear from her again. Are you trying to set this guy up for failure?
Nudity in a movie might work, but gratuitous shock porn will not help your cause.
Drewskie said:
You can't go from "hi how are you" to "take off your clothes and let me inside you" in 5 minutes. You have to identify what's important to her and run with it.
"What's your favorite color?" = job interview = boring.
"Would you like to salsa dancing tonight, I know a great club, my friend is the owner." = Fun, charming, well known guy. I will sleep with him soon.
We need specific examples before we can help.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Thanks donjuan11, that sh!ts funny too, but thing is, I don't really have an example. Here's how it goes down, I come up cool, with a smile, say "hey I'm drew", or some othrer standard, not canned opener. It just seems like a natural progression to go into.....where are from, who you here with, where do you work....blah blah blah. Before I know it, it's like i've already cut myself from the fvck worthy line-up. I don't how to make the switch to, by the way, my house is only four blocks away or whatever..
YellowPeril
Don Juan
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100% truth.DonJuan11 said:
There's no magic bullet convo topic, you've just gotta feel the girl out as you go along. Sometimes you gotta dig.