Friends always getting back with there ex's

[dillin]

Something I noticed my friends always doing is they break up with there gf's and then they always seem to get back together everytime soon after they breakup, it's insane. I dont get why they do this and it seems like all the time on here I always hear about how guys ex-gf's never want to even see them again other than friends but it just seems that everything I see with freinds is they always get back with there ex's everytime.

Why do you think it is with guys on here how ex's never want them back and thats how it usually is everywhere but for some reason my friends ex's come back everytime. Of course these girls are total sluts who have slept with every guy on the block.

 

[CLOONEY]

Your friends are probably in LTRs, no?

I have noticed this all the time, once a LTR breaks up, the couples usually end up getting back together a few times, until they either sort out their problems, or the relationship ends FOR GOOD!! It is FAR harder to totally end a LTR, because even though you both know you are not right for eachother, you have also had soo many great times together.

Most of the guys on here were only with their woman for a few months, meaning it is far easier for the girls to get rid of them and not look back. It should also be easy for the guys to let go of a girl they hardly know. Once they get confident with the game, it will be.

 

[dillin]

They do this even when the relationship still has lasted a few months aswell and it keeps going for a REALLY long time, were talking a couple years sometimes.

 

[E-Z Rider]

Yes, it is fairly common. I myself went through this.

It is usually the girl who both initiaites the getting back together and breaking up.
She deep down wants to break up but still superficially 'loves' the guy. So as soon as she breaks up she feels kinda guilty and like maybe she jumped the gun. So she calls back and tries to get back together.

The guy ususally has no idea whats going on and just wants her to stay with him. So he has no problem with accepting her back.

But each time he accepts her back, she loses a little respect for him. And eventually she has virtually NO respect. And thats when it ends.

Usually guys will twist the story around when they tell it to their friends, so it doesn't look like the girl was running the show. But trust me, it's usually the girl.

A true Don Juan knows when the girl really doesn't want him and is just superficially keeping him around. He would cut her loose after her first sign of faltering interest. In turn, she would likely gain respect for him, and subsequently her interest level would rise. And he might get her back for good.

I think if you look at the times when couples have broken up and then got back together *successfully* (like for an extended period), it was b/c the guy showed some real backbone.

Now, I'm a little drunk, so I have no idea if I'm making any sense- but you might check out my post called "Breaking up, an essential part of many relationships?" It kind of touches on this.

 

[dillin]

Originally posted by E-Z Rider
Yes, it is fairly common. I myself went through this.

It is usually the girl who both initiaites the getting back together and breaking up.
She deep down wants to break up but still superficially 'loves' the guy. So as soon as she breaks up she feels kinda guilty and like maybe she jumped the gun. So she calls back and tries to get back together.

The guy ususally has no idea whats going on and just wants her to stay with him. So he has no problem with accepting her back.

But each time he accepts her back, she loses a little respect for him. And eventually she has virtually NO respect. And thats when it ends.

Usually guys will twist the story around when they tell it to their friends, so it doesn't look like the girl was running the show. But trust me, it's usually the girl.

A true Don Juan knows when the girl really doesn't want him and is just superficially keeping him around. He would cut her loose after her first sign of faltering interest. In turn, she would likely gain respect for him, and subsequently her interest level would rise. And he might get her back for good.

I think if you look at the times when couples have broken up and then got back together *successfully* (like for an extended period), it was b/c the guy showed some real backbone.

Now, I'm a little drunk, so I have no idea if I'm making any sense- but you might check out my post called "Breaking up, an essential part of many relationships?" It kind of touches on this.

I totally agree with you, VERY good points.

All the guys I know try to act all badass when it comes to women but they just keep getting walked all over by women who are complete wh0res. These guys really do not have any self-respect at all. This is not so much to do with just taking the girls back it's just that these guys have no respect for themselves no matter whats going on.

I think getting back together in a relationship actually is ok it just depends. I think it's usually the wh0res who just keep coming back a week later after they brokeup because of the EXACT same reasons you said.

Do you think theres a better chance if the two people are good people but if they atleast move on for awhile and cut contact for eather months or years?

 

[E-Z Rider]

Originally posted by dillin


I think getting back together in a relationship actually is ok it just depends. I think it's usually the wh0res who just keep coming back a week later after they brokeup because of the EXACT same reasons you said.

Do you think theres a better chance if the two people are good people but if they atleast move on for awhile and cut contact for eather months or years?

Yes. But once two people move on, they aren't likely to cross each others paths again, and you lose that immediate feeling of love. But if you WERE by chance to run across them, it would have a much better chance of working out in the long run, I think.

You're running right into the topic my post is about, the one i mentioned above. You should check it out.

 

[dillin]

Yeah actually I did read that post before that you made, it was good.

BTW what do you mean by move on? Do you mean finding someone else or just emotional detachment? I'm wodnering, do you think two people never really move on till they have found someone else and are happy in a new relationship?