Frame control in pickup -bars and clubs

[Captain Redbeard]

ps - why was @Cheeky_James banned?

It would appear he lost his frame battle with the mods...

 

[corrector]

It would appear he lost his frame battle with the mods...

So did BPH appearently.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

Hmmmm. I guess I missed all the commotion while enjoying the weekend.

Women that I know personally including me all start by deciding whether or not a particular man is attractive (or not.) That can be done in a glance.

So this idea put forth by OP (and promoted by various PUA gurus he may have invested in) about dominance/alphaness being the magic trait?

I strongly disagree. When you see someone, you see physical presentation (looks, style, body language, maybe voice if you are close enough), and that's it. You know nothing else about the man, not his dominance or alphaness or gobbledegook that PUAs would like you to believe.

He could be gay for all the woman knows.

As far as BPH goes I can tell you he is an attractive man with a great smile, in shape and well dressed. He also is comfortable in his own skin and self confident. Has no issue striking up a conversation. He is socially adroit and charming. He is attractive and likeable. But women still must be in a "buying" mindset to show interest. And he's got to be interested back too.

I introduced him to my girlfriend's daughter. She liked him, but she wasn't his type, it is what it is sometimes.

Frame battles at the first meet are just not smart, and also are not reality. An uninterested woman is going to blow you off. Period. She might be cool about it, she might be rude (she might start out cool & become rude when you don't take the hint & bugger off)....

But a "frame battle" is a complete waste of time & is terrible advice for men who really don't know better.

Working on physical presentation (looks, style, grooming) is a much better place to make effort, if you are overweight & sloppy looking that really is the place to start.

 

[Vanderdonck]

Frame battles at the first meet are just not smart, and also are not reality. An uninterested woman is going to blow you off. Period. She might be cool about it, she might be rude (she might start out cool & become rude when you don't take the hint & bugger off)....

And women can be uninterested in that moment for a multitude of reasons. Usually has nothing to do with me. [checks breath]

Like I said to the OP once a man gets into a battle he's basically entering her "frame." The very concept is based on staying in your own, not slam them into another's.

 

[Sega Genesis]

When you see someone, you see physical presentation (looks, style, body language, maybe voice if you are close enough), and that's it. You know nothing else about the man...

I agree with this^^ however for ME (and perhaps some others including men) I can also feel his energy. I can feel it (genuine chemistry beyond just the physical) without speaking one word to him and it's as important as physical presentation. For me anyway and others I associate with.

Or perhaps it's all related however the energy/chemistry is intangible and can't be explained. Physical presentation can.

I introduced him to my girlfriend's daughter. She liked him, but she wasn't his type, it is what it is sometimes.

Probably none of my business but I'm so curious about this. Too bad @BPH won't be around for awhile to explain.

I ask because @BeExcellent knowing you as we do, you would have never introduced them if she had been unattractive and NOT a great catch.

In fact my guess is, she is extremely attractive and a great catch but yet according to BPH not his type.

Then again this is what I meant about a person's "energy" and the chemistry.

Apparently it just wasn't happening. Agree it is what it is (or isn't) sometimes.

 

[corrector]

yeah, probably its a flat personality or energy/wavelength was too off, or she came across too eager...if you can't mentally click, it don't matter how good she looks or catch.

 

[characternote]

It would appear he lost his frame battle with the mods...

So did BPH appearently.

I haven't even read the whole thread word for word, and have no idea what happened, but from just skimming it, I don't see anything 'bad'? Just different opinions? Have things been deleted? No idea why they got banned otherwise.

 

[corrector]

I haven't even read the whole thread word for word, and have no idea what happened, but from just skimming it, I don't see anything 'bad'? Just different opinions? Have things been deleted? No idea why they got banned otherwise.

Can't really say. They updated the rules and added more things to it recently. Maybe they violated one of the newer amendments. It is like the USA has lots of laws on their books you can go to jail for. So in the States, you can literally go to jail over nonsense. That what happens when there are too many laws and rules. You just trip up and get into trouble.

 

[BeExcellent]

I agree with this^^ however for ME (and perhaps some others including men) I can also feel his energy. I can feel it (genuine chemistry beyond just the physical) without speaking one word to him and it's as important as physical presentation. For me anyway and others I associate with.

Or perhaps it's all related however the energy/chemistry is intangible and can't be explained. Physical presentation can.



Probably none of my business but I'm so curious about this. Too bad @BPH won't be around for awhile to explain.

I ask because @BeExcellent knowing you as we do, you would have never introduced them if she had been unattractive and NOT a great catch.

In fact my guess is, she is extremely attractive and a great catch but yet according to BPH not his type.

Then again this is what I meant about a person's "energy" and the chemistry.

Apparently it just wasn't happening. Agree it is what it is (or isn't) sometimes.

Agree on the energy thing. I gotta have "edge" in a man on top of everything else. Edge is sexy, and its a different quality than looks & physique.

Yes my friend's daughter is pretty. Beautiful smile, tall, thin brunette with light eyes. She's also very bubbly, fun and positive to be around. But not his type & I also think she & her friends kept changing their minds on the gameplan, which BPH understandably found somewhat flaky & annoying. So he blew them off despite their efforts to include him subsequent nights.

 

[Sega Genesis]

I gotta have "edge" in a man on top of everything else. Edge is sexy, and its a different quality than looks & physique.

I'm 100% with ya on that BE. Absolutely.

Like I always say too, it's a balance between alpha qualities and beta qualities. A "bad boy" or former bad boy with a soft side, especially with me!