FR: Meetup makeouts

[Vanilla]

I wanted to meet new people. It wasn't about picking up girls specifically. Turns out, it was a GREAT decision. My attitude was at its highest when I went there, which seemed to attract attention. I remembered to smile at everyone. Guys and girls, I asked what are they passionate and tried to avoid boring topics like work/school. Got contacts from both guys and girls, success already.

Then met this girl and right away I commented on how pretty her purse was while she was in mid conversation. I felt that my voice was strong, loud and confident. We seem to hit it off right away, we shared similar interests and had drinks, non-alcoholic (since we're both driving). I then left her to meet more people since that's why we were all here, she was cool with it. Once the area was clearing out, a bunch of us then got some food. I felt like I was leading the pack since they all followed my guidance. When we all sat down, had conversations about movies and such, I kept noticing that she was gazing at me nonstop.

After a late dinner, we walked around and the topic of dancing came up. I mentioned how I took classes and wanted to dance again. She knew of a place and we met there after the group split up. When I arrived I saw her already dancing with an older guy, I didn't think much of it and went to ask other girls to dance, rejected but worth the attempt. I took her hand right afterwards to the dancefloor. Compared to the other guy, I was pretty bad but managed to remember what I learned years ago. Just after a dance or two, I wanted to sit down and she went with me.

I asked if she was adventurous and if she has done anything crazy. While she was thinking, I said "what about kissing a guy you just met?" and instantly went from a kiss to a makeout. (I haven't had one in such a long time, especially sober). After brief chatting we made out again, then once after I got my coat and we went outside, I went right in for another makeout without even thinking. She mentioned that she recently got out of a relationship like a week ago. I walked to her car and she offered me to sit in the passenger seat since it was cold.

We chatted more and got heavy with makeouts. I bit her neck a bit, one hand fondling her chest, and when my other hand went down exploring inside her panties to her vagina, she said "not tonight". She did say she's enjoying this though, even when I didn't ask. I kept initiating. I pulled her onto me. I felt her breathing heavy. Each time, I went again but she kept saying "not tonight". I also moved her hand to my c*ck for her to play with while I focused on kissing her chest and trying to rub her crotch area which got really warm. It was getting late so I decided to bail and continue this another time, hopefully at her place.

Overall very happy with myself, but feel I messed up a few times. Any tips I could use for getting past the "not tonight" LMR?

 

[Vanilla]

Well called for a second-date (if you can call it that), but she apparently got back with her ex, that sucks. Oh well, NEXT

 

[Wolfgang D]

Seems you are on the right path, Vanilla. Many things here that are textbook advice:

I wanted to meet new people. It wasn't about picking up girls specifically. Turns out, it was a GREAT decision.

Very good. That's how I do it too. I went to a singles-only pub event a few weeks ago and forgot that it was a singles-only thing, just acted normal. While I saw other guys hanging on to the women's every word. Guess who got a date with the most attractive girl there next week? Indifference, friendliness, fun topics, that's the key.

I remembered to smile at everyone.

Good.

Guys and girls, I asked what are they passionate and tried to avoid boring topics like work/school.

On a distinguished road you are, young Padawan.

I then left her to meet more people since that's why we were all here, she was cool with it.

Teh Exc3llent.

I mentioned how I took classes and wanted to dance again.

I'm gonna say this again, which I said in the salsa thread recently: dance classes pay off. Women love it. Because they survive through being part of the group, and dancing shows that you know how to be part of the group. Hey, we don't make the rules. It is also sensual, puts boy and girl in the right mood without anything being said.

I saw her already dancing with an older guy, I didn't think much of it

Indifference. Ah, I have a story about this. Some other time.

Compared to the other guy, I was pretty bad but managed to remember what I learned years ago.

And what does it matter? You show that you are there to have fun. You don't act goofy. You just treat it for what it is, a dance for God's sake. You are good at other things, so you don't let this bother you - that is the attitude to have.

While she was thinking, I said "what about kissing a guy you just met?" and instantly went from a kiss to a makeout.

One other way to initiate that I have to remember. There are no sure-fire ways, I am still struggling with this. (If there were any sure ways, everyone would know about them.) Just collect the advice and apply when you have the right opportunity, and if it fits your style and fits the girl.

I bit her neck a bit, one hand fondling her chest,

...Okay, getting a bit too graphic in this paragraph. But hey. Good work.

Well called for a second-date (if you can call it that), but she apparently got back with her ex, that sucks. Oh well, NEXT

Exactly. You can only do so much. Then it's out of your hands. How you look and act, that's just one variable in her decision. She has a past, she has ex-bfs, she has other prospects, she has studies and work to take care of, and it's just a good or bad time in her year, etc ... lots of variables.

Getting a "no" is the normal answer. Just like when you want to sell something through cold calls. Or when you are applying for a job. Or look up ads for an apartment to hire second-hand. Demand wildly exceeds supply. You have to keep throwing out the line, knowing that the number of fishing lines is much bigger than the number of hungry fish. Keep throwing out the line.

If I would make a new handle it would be Fisherman, just to remind people of this.

 

[Vanilla]

Many thanks for the reply, glad to see I'm doing it right. I've gotten plenty of rejections, so this is just another one to add to the pile. I know that I'm a catch. And I'll leave the 50 shades of grey parts out next time.

 

[Solomon]

Overall very happy with myself, but feel I messed up a few times. Any tips I could use for getting past the "not tonight" LMR?

Props on this report I'm curious though, what type of "meetup" was this? was this online etc?

I usually am very persistent but there comes a point where sometimes it's best to to walk away because you can come off looking "Thirsty" (desperate) if you try to hard. I wouldn't wait to long though, I had a chick to do this to me a couple years ago every time thinks got hot and heavy she would give me uber-LMR come to find out she was holding out on her ex. So don't be the guy giving her that validation

 

[Vanilla]

Props on this report I'm curious though, what type of "meetup" was this? was this online etc?

I usually am very persistent but there comes a point where sometimes it's best to to walk away because you can come off looking "Thirsty" (desperate) if you try to hard. I wouldn't wait to long though, I had a chick to do this to me a couple years ago every time thinks got hot and heavy she would give me uber-LMR come to find out she was holding out on her ex. So don't be the guy giving her that validation

Yes, it was Meetup.com for recent college grads. It helped break the ice by using this as a main topic and everyone was in the mood to meet/talk to strangers.

 

[D Wolfgang]

Many thanks for the reply, glad to see I'm doing it right. I've gotten plenty of rejections, so this is just another one to add to the pile. I know that I'm a catch. And I'll leave the 50 shades of grey parts out next time.

You're welcome. And hey, rejections aren't always forever. I contacted a girl six months after contact had petered out. I had a good event to suggest to her, and she said yes. We dated for a while after that. She told me that when we had first met (I did a cold approach in the street with a lame excuse) she was just breaking up with her boyfriend, which of course she didn't tell me, because she was charmed that I was talking to her.

Another girl also, who actually contacted me and suggested we meet up, five weeks after I had written her off. I learned that she had had a lot to do five weeks earlier, trying to find a new apartment among other things.

Another girl, dated for three months about three years ago - slept with her again a couple of times this summer. We met up and had dinner, movie and sex at my place every time, with no intention of doing anything else.

Don't burn any bridges by being clingy or spelling out your lament about how she doesn't want to date you. A small percentage of them will be bedmates later down the road.

 

[Vanilla]

You're welcome. And hey, rejections aren't always forever. I contacted a girl six months after contact had petered out. I had a good event to suggest to her, and she said yes. We dated for a while after that. She told me that when we had first met (I did a cold approach in the street with a lame excuse) she was just breaking up with her boyfriend, which of course she didn't tell me, because she was charmed that I was talking to her.

Another girl also, who actually contacted me and suggested we meet up, five weeks after I had written her off. I learned that she had had a lot to do five weeks earlier, trying to find a new apartment among other things.

Another girl, dated for three months about three years ago - slept with her again a couple of times this summer. We met up and had dinner, movie and sex at my place every time, with no intention of doing anything else.

Don't burn any bridges by being clingy or spelling out your lament about how she doesn't want to date you. A small percentage of them will be bedmates later down the road.

Solid advice. She randomly messaged me on Facebook this week. I responded after 2 days. I took that as high interest and now I have a second date for Saturday. We'll see how far it goes this time.

 

[Vanilla]

Just got back from a second date. Over the holiday weekend, she confirmed that she broke up with the guy. When we were chatting, I found out that she's really boring, so conversations wouldn't go anywhere. We just walked around for a while until I had to bail for work.

I wasn't feeling a connection, but tried for a kiss at the end which she turned her head so I just got her cheek. Damn.

 

[old_skoolr]

awesome post, some of the best nights Ive had have been when picking up wasnt on the agenda, but instead enjoying my night. Your whole mindset changes....always good.