"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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FR: Disney movies!

LikRetsam

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My best friend is going to college and so one of our mutual female friends hosts a goodbye party for him. Yay? It's a bunch of females and some guys I can't stand. But it's for my friend so I decide to show. All I have to say is that it takes very little for chicks to take off all their clothes.

It's about midnight and most everyone has left except for 7 people. 4 guys, 3 chicks. One of these chicks, is the hottest piece of ass ever. She's my friends girlfriend and an ex of mine from a few years ago. We're all out back and there's a sprinkler set up. The host and the hot chick remove their clothes and reveal bikini's as they go play in the sprinkler. Attention *****s? Maybe. Nice bodies? Unquestionably. They aren't having as much fun as they should be having so I'm walking around and they push me into the sprinkler. I get soaked. It's time to PARTY! I strip down to boxer and start pushing them into the sprinkler and whatnot. the grass is soaked so we're slipping and falling down. The other guys and other chick decide to "Sit this one out" .

We get inside and set up a movie. Meanwhile, I am in the kitchen baking brownies with the host and my friends' girlfriend. I've gotten the signs in the past, the "I want to **** right here right now" look but nothing compares to the double team action in that kitchen. As enticing as she was stripped down in nothing but a real small underwear and a really tight bra, she was still my best friends girlfriend. And that means she is OFF LIMITS . She is reaching for ingredients across my back, gently rubbing on her way back, accidentally putting chocolate on my nose and licking it off (then proceeding to insert her tongue in my open mouth but not touching anything). All the while, the host in just as much clothing and much bigger tits will not get my leg out from between hers, rubbing herself against it gently... All the while we are joking outloud and pretending that nothing is going on. Once we're out of the kitchen, things REALLY cool down. I pay no attention to it, I didn't come here to get laid.

We boot up Team america (hehe) followed by Léon. I'm on the ground with the host lieing on a sleeping bag while the 5 others are on couches/beds. I wasn't getting any signs for a long time so I really forgot about everything. I was having a good time. After both movies ended, we decided we had to pull an all nighter and insert THE INCREDIBLES. As with all disney movies, I was not watching this for more than 20 minutes before her tongue was down my throat. I was bored of this movie rather quickly so ran my hand slowly up and down her arm. She kept falling asleep so I nudged her a bit to keep her awake every now and then. Eventually though, she was sitting up against a sofa and I put my hand on her shoulder and massaged her. That was my green light baby, she took my hand with hers. I lean back onto the sleeping back and she falls with her head on my chest... My hands start doing their magic all over her body as she reciprocates the movement. She starts breathing deeper and moaning just a bit... My lips are so close to hers I can feel her breath as eyes closed she says :
"We shouldn't do this... stop..."
"Okay..."
In one final movement, I slide my hand from about her knee all the way up to her zone rubbing against her pants as I settle on her area, and massage just a bit. Her body pushes a bit, she moans and rolls over on top of me.

Apparently, the floor is uncomfortable because it wasn't long before we were in her room. By the time we were done, I had just received head for the 3rd time in the evening. Could we have gone further? Yeah... if I had ****ING CONDOM!

The movie ends downstairs so we head down. It's light out and people are about to start leaving. Meanwhile bestfriend and hot ass ex break up with each other. All is well that ends well, right? This aint no fairy tale. One of the guys opens his mouth looking at my Fvckbuddy with the look.

The only thing I remember thinking at that moment is "I sense pure evil".

As he says: Are you done being used yet?

She promptly runs upstairs and breaks down, my ex running after her.

"Good game" he says.
"Game over" I reply as I walk out of the house with my best friend and go home.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Porky

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Brother, this is like the eighth time you've been without a condom. I'm going to stop by your house today and drop off a 24-pack.
 

familyguyfan

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Wait, why was that guy mad at you for hooking up with that girl?


Nice job though.
 

Patrick124

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probably cause hes jealous his dumbass didn't get none of that poonany.
haha. good call bro.
I dunno if ur like em, but i always "forget"
a condom if I'm chilling with sluts. I've had the oppertunity..but honestly I don't want to lose it to slutty-mcslutterson
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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gravstar

Don Juan
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Yeeeeeeeeeeew!
Holy crap your balls must have been big just before you got blown. Isn't the lead up to that kind of stuff just legendary. (Seduction)
:D
 

Peace_Out

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Holy F*** Reading that gave me a boner (over the chick) :p Props to you mate, you deserve it. That C***smoker should be punched in the face. Although on the plus side the w**ka didn't c*ckblock you and you actually got some.

~Peace Out
 
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