"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Found out something disturbing about my current GF

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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KarmaSutra

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Padron Reserve maduro in hand while finishing my b
Fenderules said:
she told me that back when she was 16, her Bf at the time got into some harsh drugs. They had no money what so ever so she ended up selling her body to around 30 guys or so. she would meet them on chat lines and then real life and **** them.
Each time this c0ckslvt creeps into your skull, imagine you kissing her and each of those 30 guys cvm rolling around your mouths.

If that doesn't work (if it doesn't you've a cuckold fetish) take out your c0ck and beat it with the claw end of a hammer.
 
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