foreigner dating local girl - please help!

[TheTraveller]

Hi,

I'm currently living in Hong Kong and I just recently met a local (Hong Kong - Chinese) girl this past weekend.

Since I'm only here for 1 more month, I'd like to make the "most" out of this situation. What I mean is, I know there are cultural differences here, but I can tell she is genuinely interested (met at club, she offered her number) and I would like to pursue this interest all the way to my bedroom

So, with my limited timeframe and cultural differences of girls here in general going slower than Western girls, how should I get her back to my place? Should I do so when I call her tomorrow for our first real date or should it wait a bit?

Thanks,
- t

 

[jakethasnake]

Originally posted by TheTraveller
Hi,

I'm currently living in Hong Kong and I just recently met a local (Hong Kong - Chinese) girl this past weekend.

Since I'm only here for 1 more month, I'd like to make the "most" out of this situation. What I mean is, I know there are cultural differences here, but I can tell she is genuinely interested (met at club, she offered her number) and I would like to pursue this interest all the way to my bedroom

So, with my limited timeframe and cultural differences of girls here in general going slower than Western girls, how should I get her back to my place? Should I do so when I call her tomorrow for our first real date or should it wait a bit?

Thanks,
- t

It's obvious that this girl is another Lan Kwai Fong/Wan Chai bargirl. Lemme guess - she is either a Filipina or a local Hong Kong girl - am I right? I see a lot of those -- overweight or dorky British or Aussie guys with Filipina or HK Chinese girlfriends/wives. No offense, pal.

But getting back to the point, she is after your money, and also the perceived 'status' you have as a foreign male (usu. white) in a former colony - inferiority complexes die hard. The ho' offered herself to you - so what are you waiting for? **** her hard and furious, then leave. Trust me - the bargirls that frequent the expatriate bars are VVHORES. They are pros - they are NOT 'slow'. Trust me on this. They are used to the faster Western pace of courting. since they make it their second life to hit on expats (who they hope are richer than the local men).



Treat her with the respect she deserves - you've made it clear that you don't intend to be serious with this anyway.

 

[TheTraveller]

She's just graduated from university here in HK (and I'm a univ. student in HK) and she's in a profession that makes decent coin and NO, not that kind of profession.

I met her at a local club, not one of the expat bars which I despise.

Any more advice based on these more specific facts? I also was accepted by all her friends

 

[jakethasnake]

I think the key to inter-cultural relationships is the downplay the difference, at least at the start. The issues slowly creep up when you get serious, but at the start, she is like any other woman. You're overanalyzing... which makes it likely that you'll fail.

If you fail with a naive Asian-Asian girl (not Asian-American), you're an utter failure as a DJ. In terms of a challenge, they are the lowest of the low - they have no sense of humor and thus laugh at your dumbest jokes, are pliable, and generally have low self-esteem. I find them a joke as a challenge, so I mostly hit on white girls now. They are more fun to tackle.


But like I said - just keep it simple. Culture is not a big deal right now. Play it like you'd play a British girl or an Aussie chick or where ever the hell it is you come from.

 

[TheTraveller]

That all makes sense, but what about this perceived notion I have(obtained from speaking with friends here) that HK and Asian girls like to go slower than that of Western girls, so courting them would take more time? Doesn't this mean that taking things too fast, even when they know you are only here for 1 month more, can ruin everything and scare them away?

Just something I find to be a generalization with a hopeful exception.
- t

 

[WizardOfOz]

I agree with jakethasnake's idea of treating her just any other woman.

Unlike yourself I've heard that Asian (HK women in particular) like to 'go hard'. You've only got one month. Get cracking.

PS I was in HK recently. Loved the place. Unfortunately didn't get to hit the clubs while I was there. Make the most of it while you can.

 

[TheTraveller]

Like to "go hard"? What are you implying here dude?

 

[WizardOfOz]

I'm implying that they're wild in bed.

Unfortunately I'm not speaking from personal experience. I have some Asian friends and that's what they tell me.


I guess you need to work this out for yourself. I believe every race/country has a range of different women in regards to how fast/slow they like things to move.

 

[TheTraveller]

You're probably right. My only experiences with Asian women is one Asian-American who was indeed wild in bed

I'll give this one a call tomorrow evening and see how things go.