For those who do online dating (which seems more required with the pandemic)

[Sebastian0001]

Once you match with a woman, do you first set up a phone call or do you go straight into the date? And if straight into the date, do you start with something small like coffee or straight to something more like dinner? It seems to me women have some sort of ASD to hook up after dinner?

Also, for those who are very opposed to online dating, how have you been meeting women during the pandemic? It seems there are less opportunities to cold approach people due to all the restrictions? The only thing I don't like about online dating is that the selection pool seems of lower quality and the women seems to be of the type who might not get guys in person already. The hot women get approached just by going anywhere and don't need more sources of guys coming after them.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Get her off OLD and on to text asap.
Set up date asap
Meet in a public place.
I’ve done lunch, dinner, coffee, drinks... all good.

 

[CoandaEffect]

I was using OLD at the beginning of this year (match.com). I would send a message to the ladies I was interested in. Put some effort into it, make it clear that you have read her profile. Ask her a question which makes it easier for her to reply. Don’t make you messages too long, 4 or 5 sentences does it. I had replies from about 10% of them. Some of them would then ghost, not that many, maybe 1 in 5.

I would request a date on my 3rd message. Most accepted but some would make up excuses. To those I would let them know that I was not interested in a lengthy texting game and would ask them to contact me when they had free time. All of them blocked me, that’s how I flushed out the AWs.

First few dates should be cheap, coffee, walk, ice cream, drink at a bar, nothing more. The women that are interested in your wallet will not accept second dates. The women that are interested in you will be keen to date again.

I met a very nice lady using that method. We’ve been together for 5 months now. So far, so good.

Good luck!

 

[Zimbabwe]

Get her number and get her OFF OLD ASAP, after that organise a date within a couple of texts.

If she gives any answer that isn't a firm YES, you delete her and move on to the next chick. Women who make up excuses are time wasters who have no interest in you romantically.

 

[andreihaha]

Here's my "map" of success online:

1. I look at her profile and see if I like something. If she has nothing of interest, the conversation is gonna be boring probably.
2. I start a conversation about something I find interesting. Like: "Hi. Good song on the profile." or "Hi. What do you write/paint/etc.?
3. See where the conversation goes like a normal human being. Be intelligent, be sexual if appropriate, without being arrogant or a creep. Let her talk about herself more that you do about yourself. Ask questions that you're honeslty curious about, no small talk.
4. If she seems interesting, tell her you'd like to grab a drink. Usually easy to slip it in after talking about something personal. Like "I'd ask you why, but it seems to be a question I'd rather ask in person. Got some free time this week?"
5. Give her your number and tell her you'll contact each other more easily over phone/whatsapp/whatever is popular for you.
6. When you have time, call her to set a date. It shows them you're not afraid of talking, that you're well calibrated and you can hear her reaction and her tonality/voice on the phone. I got a date every time I did this.
7. You go out for a drink or whatever you want to do. Something easy and fun, 1-2 hours max. No dinner, no movie.


If at any point, she doesn't seem interested enough, stop talking to her. Only continue if she initiates, make it clear you're not looking for an online buddy. If she disrespects you, delete her. It's more about respecting yourself and seeing your best interest, but also about teaching her a lesson.

My opinion? It's really hard to find someone right for you online if you want a LTR/life partner. If you want just sex, it works fine.

Good luck!

 

[Atom Smasher]

To this I would add, make her aware early on that you are testing and evaluating her to see if she fits in your life and meets your expectations. In other words, you are judging her.
You’ve got to flip that script. Most men loudly broadcast that they’re all-in right from the start. Women sense that they hold 100% of the power because the guy is simply there to see if he is accepted or not.
Can a woman look up to such a man?Certainly not. Women CRAVE a man who they perceive as above them. Flip the script early on and let her sense in no uncertain terms that you are judging her. Then send a generous contribution to my PayPal account for having solved your dating problems.

 

[Sebastian0001]

To this I would add, make her aware early on that you are testing and evaluating her to see if she fits in your life and meets your expectations. In other words, you are judging her.
You’ve got to flip that script. Most men loudly broadcast that they’re all-in right from the start. Women sense that they hold 100% of the power because the guy is simply there to see if he is accepted or not.
Can a woman look up to such a man?Certainly not. Women CRAVE a man who they perceive as above them. Flip the script early on and let her sense in no uncertain terms that you are judging her. Then send a generous contribution to my PayPal account for having solved your dating problems.

great point! Would this be in the form of questions to show her you are evaluating her? What kind of questions are some good examples to show her this?

 

[Sebastian0001]

Here's my "map" of success online:

1. I look at her profile and see if I like something. If she has nothing of interest, the conversation is gonna be boring probably.
2. I start a conversation about something I find interesting. Like: "Hi. Good song on the profile." or "Hi. What do you write/paint/etc.?
3. See where the conversation goes like a normal human being. Be intelligent, be sexual if appropriate, without being arrogant or a creep. Let her talk about herself more that you do about yourself. Ask questions that you're honeslty curious about, no small talk.
4. If she seems interesting, tell her you'd like to grab a drink. Usually easy to slip it in after talking about something personal. Like "I'd ask you why, but it seems to be a question I'd rather ask in person. Got some free time this week?"
5. Give her your number and tell her you'll contact each other more easily over phone/whatsapp/whatever is popular for you.
6. When you have time, call her to set a date. It shows them you're not afraid of talking, that you're well calibrated and you can hear her reaction and her tonality/voice on the phone. I got a date every time I did this.
7. You go out for a drink or whatever you want to do. Something easy and fun, 1-2 hours max. No dinner, no movie.


If at any point, she doesn't seem interested enough, stop talking to her. Only continue if she initiates, make it clear you're not looking for an online buddy. If she disrespects you, delete her. It's more about respecting yourself and seeing your best interest, but also about teaching her a lesson.

My opinion? It's really hard to find someone right for you online if you want a LTR/life partner. If you want just sex, it works fine.

Good luck!

Thanks this is excellent! I do want LTR/life partner and I agree that online dating is not great for this. What would you say are a few of the better venues to meet a quality LTR life partner type of girl?

 

[Atom Smasher]

great point! Would this be in the form of questions to show her you are evaluating her? What kind of questions are some good examples to show her this?

Make humorous remarks like “Uh-oh… you lost a couple points with me on that one. You’ll have to make up for it”.
Basically pepper a few humorous questions about her suitability, but these must be in a friendly, self-amused way.
Combine that with leading her physically and mentally and you’ve got a lethal combination.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Once you match with a woman, do you first set up a phone call or do you go straight into the date? And if straight into the date, do you start with something small like coffee or straight to something more like dinner? It seems to me women have some sort of ASD to hook up after dinner?

Also, for those who are very opposed to online dating, how have you been meeting women during the pandemic? It seems there are less opportunities to cold approach people due to all the restrictions? The only thing I don't like about online dating is that the selection pool seems of lower quality and the women seems to be of the type who might not get guys in person already. The hot women get approached just by going anywhere and don't need more sources of guys coming after them.

I sniper approach IRL. OLD is rubbish. All fatties and single mom's. Use ig. Swipe. Video chat to avoid catfish and actually approach IRL.

 

[andreihaha]

Thanks this is excellent! I do want LTR/life partner and I agree that online dating is not great for this. What would you say are a few of the better venues to meet a quality LTR life partner type of girl?

Social circle is the best, if it involves new people constantly. Otherwise, any place where you can meet women you have something in common with. Depends on your interests.