"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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For all you guys on NC, stop it!

JdelaSilviera

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Well, if it is working for you it´s fine, I tried it and my experience is exactly what Desdinova said in the past....

2. "You probably weren't around when sosuave had "Ganji Game Fever". It produced some of the worst cases of one-itis I had ever seen on here. Guys had put themselves into positions where they wouldn't date other women because they were using "Ganji Games" for weeks and months hoping that their ex-gf would come back to them." - Desdinova

A few months now, it´s better to stay in contact and still pursue other girls. Otherwise you will become obsessed, counting the days you´ve been NC, and wondering if she is going to contact you.... terrible..
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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P

perseverance

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No contact should be used as a last resort and it should done with the intention of never having anything else to do with the person you've gone no contact on. I use no contact and it's very effective, because a person out of sight in my experience, eventually becomes a person out of mind. It's a great technique and one I'd recommend to anyone - providing your actual intention is to have nothing more to do with the woman/women concerned.
 

Iceberg

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Well, what is your definition of going No Contact?

Let's say I've been banging a girl for a few weeks. I ask her to go out, she says "I can't today. But maybe saturday." Then Saturday rolls around, and I don't hear from her.

My assumption is that after I made the initial meet-up attempt, an interested woman will reciprocate by calling to arrange the date. The only weapon in my arsenal is to go NC. It removes the woman from my mind. And it keeps me from being the pursuer in this situation, which would just lower my value.

Could I continue to call the woman to arrange dates that she'll continue to not show up for? Sure. But I don't see the benefit. And yes, there is the chance that reaching out to her would re-open the communication (and banging), but I feel that my best prospects were always the ones who were chasing me.
 

Zerro

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Some people are acting like it's all or nothing and that Limited Contact is not an option.
 

EvilAgenda

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No contact was never meant to get your ex back.

It's meant to get her out of your mind, and concentrate on your life, which includes MEETING NEW WOMEN.

A lot of the newbies thought it was about getting their ex back. NO, the advice of no contact was to get your ex OUT OF YOUR MIND, which in turn actually makes you more attractive to her.

It just so happens that your ex-gf expects you to be miserable, and when you are not, wonder and doubt start to creep into her mind, and she WILL start reaching out to you, etc, etc. And newbies mistook the no contact for a strategy to get your ex back...which it never was.

And also what Iceberg said has been proven to be effective and true time and time again to eliminate girls you do not want and keep the girls that you do want. That guy knows what he is talking about.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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SMS 48

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I went NC and actually moved the fukk on. I have no idea how long its been since I last talked to her.

It still hurts at times, but if I was talking to her now, things would be so much worse.

You're giving very bad advice by telling guys to still talk to women who they can't be with but still have feelings for. Wtf OP?
 

LearningSlowly

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Zerro said:
Some people are acting like it's all or nothing and that Limited Contact is not an option.
Agreed. For girls that don't text to offer a date if they said they would, I won't go no contact. I'll just text them back in 2 weeks when they may be more interested.

No Contact for me is after I get in too deep with a girl and she's making me have bad feelings, or after something happens to ruin a connection with girl and I want nothing more to do with her.

I don't obsess over waiting for her to text me, of course she won't.
 

MisterD

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no contact is one of the strongest tools a man can have in his arsenal. i would be lying if i said i didn't feel a sense of satisfaction when i walk away from a girl unannounced, without explanation, and move on with my life. it feels like you broke free from the ***** spell. it's a very empowering feeling knowing that at any minute, you could walk away

you set certain standards for yourself. your own code. you say i'll stick around until she does xyz, i wont tolerate xyz. if she does xyz and you can't walk away, that's trouble. set a bar and when the woman feels to meet it, you have to be able to walk away.

it's also good in a limited dose. as in i feel like i'm losing frame with a girl. so i go nc to show i dont depend on her. and maybe i show up a month or so later like nothing happened, and reframe.

no contact is the only way to make sure you dont say or do something that makes you look weak or emotional
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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Most of you guys over-think every aspect of the game. Even when it comes to going no contact you fools still over-think it. When you go no contact you should be putting her out of mind until she comes with 110% co-operation.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Krueg

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I think its a good point, but NC is also good for moving on in your life and getting over the ex.
 

SoSuave666

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I've seen NC work in getting your ex back, I've seen it fail. I've seen NC work in forgetting about your ex, I've seen AFCs go nuts a year later after initiating NC because their "true love" hasn't reached out. It's all about how you use it and the end goal. If you want to forget about your ex, actively subscribe to that mentality. As far as getting your ex back, NC works but you have to reach out at some point to test the waters if she doesn't come to you. I've seen it work best when a man goes NC, his feelings for his ex subside and her value becomes the same as any other plate he might try and spin...essentially a reset button. This way, if she does not reciprocate, so what? Women have a tendency not to forget the past though.

Personally, I think it's wasted motion to use NC as a means of getting your ex back, even though every "get your ex back" forum or guru will preach it.
 
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